<p>Good luck Genny mac!</p>
<p>The OP and collegeproject should teach a workshop on double entendres.</p>
<p>emilybee, thanks for your comments. it’s disappointing to see that some schools have been turned into “holding” tanks. </p>
<p>i haven’t read the whole thread but has there been much mention that some girls also have the same struggles adjusting to high school, i.e., inattentiveness, disorganization, forgetfulness?</p>
<p>/raises hand</p>
<p>I had exactly this kind of issue in middle school and 9th grade (and I am a girl)–it manifested as laziness and forgetfulness. Some of it was! But it was caused by a weird kind of performance anxiety that I’m only beginning to untangle now.</p>
<p>I don’t really have much advice for you; I started doing my work when I decided I should start doing my work, and nothing my parents did in the meantime helped much. But yes, this happens to both boys and girls, and sometimes we just have to grow out of it.</p>
<p>I think that I am a great personal example of this. My “pulling through” started last year in 9th grade, where I learned that high school is about organization and studying. My grades were above average and I had 1 B that year. Now, that I’m a sophomore, and I’m taking harder classes, I have all grades above 96% so yay.</p>
<p>Not sure if this will help but we did 2 college tours while on vacation going into jr. year. Top tier schools which we didn’t know much about (that might have been a good thing b/c my son was very open to new ideas) - U Chicago & Northwestern. The info sessions & tours were great. They emphasized, in a fun upbeat way, that they wanted to see As on the report cards but some b’s are okay. </p>
<p>While he would never fit into UChicago in a million years- we didn’t know that at the time- it was our first time kicking the tires. </p>
<p>The light bulb went on for my son! ah ha! I want to go away to a really cool college threfore my grades matter… Then he started to work</p>
<p>I have a 10th grade son & I’m still waiting for the light bulb to shine bright.</p>
<p>He is gifted (140 or so IQ), does great on standardized tests, has ADD and consistently forgets to hand in homework. He has very little interest in school work.</p>
<p>I used to worry that he had no work ethic. However, he has in the last year shown great commitment to a few ECs. I even have seen some great leadership skills lately. He put a ton of time and effort into a design/build project for Engineering Club. He is certainly the leader of his Engineering team. Now, why can’t he put half that effort into math and science classes?! (BTW - before 2 weeks ago I had no idea he joined the Engineering Club).</p>
<p>So, although the bulb isn’t shining, at least we are experiencing some surges.</p>
<p>My S didn’t really get his act together until his senior year, after we started college tours and he saw some great places he’d like to go, but probably wouldn’t be able to go to because of his grades. Then he was high honor roll all year.</p>
<p>I had had him tested in middle school and was told he was borderline ADD and it was up to us to decide to put him on meds. We did not go that route.</p>
<p>I agree with blueiguana that very short term goals would be helpful. We made the mistake of rewarding short term progress (progress reports or report card) and he would then proceed to slide until we caught on at a future reporting period, and yanked his privileges again. Looking back, it would have been better to have smaller increments of checking on his success - his grades resembled a sine wave.</p>
<p>With my S I thought it was more a maturity issue than ADD, I think that turned out to be right. He is a college freshman and is doing well in a demanding engineering program.</p>
<p>Perhaps it’s because I’m a girl but I started pulling it together in 9th grade. Up until 8th grade I, like many others, cared little about school, did fantastically on standardized tests, and had a gifted IQ. I earned several Cs each year and did in fact fail Latin one trimester. My parents never put an ounce of pressure on me to perform which I think was what allowed me to more quickly make the decision to start working. In 9th grade I was placed in all honors classes, one of which was incredibly challening, and I started to work and earn all As. I think the key is a healthy amount of challenge. Too much and the kids will feel discouraged and fail. Too little and the kids don’t care at all. </p>
<p>I realized if I had aspirations to be around smart kids in college who cared about intellectual things, that I was going to have put forth some effort. I’m grateful I realized this at the begining of 9th grade when it really started to matter.</p>
<p>wow, just stumbled on this and I could have written the original post myself. My son was exactly the same in middle school (pulled it together enough in 8th grade to get As and Bs though, because he wanted to go to a selective high school). He did get into that high school, partly because he had shown that he was able to perform, and perhaps partly to some divine intervention.</p>
<p>He BARELY passed 9th grade (literally) but this year (10th) is much better. I won’t lie and say he is sailing through or getting all As but let’s just say that we are disappointed in Cs this year instead of thrilled to see them because they mean he is not going to get kicked out of the school! (it’s a very work-intensive school, not for everyone … the one thing he has going for him is that he loves the school and does not want to leave)</p>
<p>Also, he just got his PSAT scores back and they definitely reflect the lax days of his earlier education. We have our work cut out for us before the “official” 11th grade PSATs and even more so before the SATs!</p>
<p>OK, I haven’t read the thread yet - had to get the thought out first. I’ll do that now!</p>
<p>Edit: read the thread, could have written many more than just first post: my son is also in a LaSallian school with a sister in public (a senior) who has excelled in honors and AP as well as other areas - high property taxes and a public school system challenged by fiscal woes - add to that ‘ADD type behaviors’ and textbook ‘executive dysfunction’ characteristics. Wish I’d seen this back when it was going on!! Hope someone still reads :-)</p>
<p>I have 2 DS’s with the high IQ/ low grades scenario. It is frustrating to say the least. With my oldest, who is a Junior, he has seemed to finally mature this year… finally. I think he just coasted through elementary school and then when things got a little tougher in HS he did not know how to really study and push himself… so the result a transcript full of B’s. This year he has pulled a few A’s finally. I did take him to visit a few colleges last year and I think that is what really motivated him… he also seems to be doing better in the harder AP classes. He always tests amazingly well… just got his first SAT back and it was VERY good. Don’t know if that is a good thing or a bad coupled with his low GPA.</p>
<p>DS2 is a 9TH grader who is scary smart, but also doesn’t perform at where he should. He is very social and is very involved with his passion… the performing arts. He is ADHD also, and so all this stuff at the same time makes it hard for him to focus on his schoolwork. He does really well if he studies and puts in the effort, but that is up and down. He will probably end up looking at performing arts schools, but I want him to have a choice too. He has fallen in love with Physics, and is really excelling at that, so that’s a good sign. </p>
<p>I have driven myself nuts over this. I have heard from a lot of people that sometimes the smartest kids don’t always have the best grades… i.e. Einstein, but I just see some of their choices being stripped away because they can’t seem to “pull it all together” I think it is pretty common… especially for boys.</p>
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<p>WOW!! THAT is funny!!!</p>
<p>Chiming in… S1 had great grades in middle school, but started to tank 2nd semester 8th grade. After quite a bit of agonizing, we decided to put him in private school for 9th grade, thinking the small class size and close teacher attention would turn things around. BIG mistake. The school was a “one size fits all” with very few classes to choose from, and everyone was put on a fast college track. S is not a genius and is easily overwhelmed-- had 7 classes that year, and failed 2 of them. Repeated 1 of them the summer after grade 9, did great, and repeated the other in grade 10 at the (highly regarded) public school, did great. He is now a jr, improving slowly, but improving. His grades are better than ever (although still not on par with most students discussed in this forum), and he’s got a good group of friends.</p>
<p>Is he where he needs to be? No. Looking back, I think it was lack of maturation and focus. He was immature and didn’t have a passion, and didn’t really see the relevance of school to his life. He’s now got a part time job he loves, and has found his passion-- music. He’s also beginning to see that he has to put in the work to get where he wants to go.</p>
<p>We are definitely in the “still waiting” (tap, tap, tap) camp. He may well end up at the local community college, but that’s fine, as long as he has a goal to reach for.</p>