Brother Suspended, Need Advice!

<p>Hey guys, my brother is a second-year student at Syracuse University. Yesterday, he found out that he is being suspended for a year for having two alcohol violations. Before he got suspended, he prepared for the worst and sent his transcript ASAP to Tulane. He finished his application before he was even suspended. He has a 3.02 at Syracuse, but pulled a 3.36 last semester. He's nothing spectacular academically, but has a very strong resume. He wrote regularly for the student newspaper, interned this past summer on Capitol Hill in D.C. and interns for a Syracuse magazine. </p>

<p>He's really not a bad kid and feels really terrible for getting kicked out of school. Does anyone have any recommendations or insight on his chances for Tulane? He is considering moving to D.C. and working for a year and then going back to Syracuse. He already has 64 credits even though he has only been there for 3 semesters due to APs. It probably makes since to suck it up for a year and go back to Syracuse, but he doesn't even like Syracuse and would rather go to Tulane anyways. He just dropped all his classes and is kind of not sure what do to. Any ideas? P.S. he is 20-years-old.</p>

<p>While his application is finished, his final transcript from Syracuse will show the suspension. I have no idea if Tulane will care or not that he has been suspended, but I would assume they will want a final transcript as well as a letter from Syracuse that he was in good standing when he left. Most schools ask for this letter, usually from the dean of students.</p>

<p>I don't have any other ideas, sorry.</p>

<p>He probably is really NOT a bad kid, and that is why I think first he should enroll in some serious alcohol treatment and counseling, and only then consider his options.</p>

<p>Yeah I have no idea what my brother does at Syracuse, but I honestly don't think he is an alcoholic. I think irresponsibilty is more the issue here, but I suppose that is up for debate. I kind of agree about transferring to Tulane...who knows what they will think when they find out that he dropped all his classes this semester. I go to GW and I know a kid who got kicked out for something similar, but transferred to Tulane. Is Tulane easy to get into or something?</p>

<p>Whether he is an alcoholic or not, he owes it to himself to find out, and to do something about it. (And since alcoholism is a highly hereditable condition, it is something you should know as well.) </p>

<p>Students do stupid things, and most student binge drinkers do NOT become alcoholics. But roughly half or so of the binge drinkers become heavy (near daily drinkers) while in college, and, of those, about 60% will become alcoholics in the next 20 years, if they aren't so already. Your brother has nothing to lose from checking it out, and everything to gain.</p>

<p>Tulane likely has lots of open spaces in its upper classes, and warm bodies help pay the rent. (That is NOT a slap at Tulane, just a dose of reality about their current situation.)</p>

<p>I might add -- it should be pretty obvious -- that Tulane is NOT the place where I would send someone who has an alcohol problem and a track record of getting into trouble because of it.</p>

<p>I think wherever your brother decides to transfer to he is going to have to go and talk to them about his options and find out what he can do. If his current school will show him as suspended he needs to be straightforward and honest with the new school.</p>

<p>Your brother was caught with alcohol twice, and suspended for a year? Is there more to this story? Given the social atmosphere at Syracuse this surprises me. If he was suspended, then he didn't drop his classes, right? - he was told to leave. Tulane will know that he was suspended and he will have to explain the circumstances.</p>

<p>Deciding your brother is not an alcoholic, not having even been there, is putting his life in danger.
Even if not a true alcoholic -and he may be one-it is clear he is dumb as dirt when he starts drinking. Once he got that first violation, most students would avoid parties that might bring the police, avoid alcohol completely, throw away that illegal ID he is using at bars..in fact stay sober. The fact that he did not shows either he is driven to drink, and perhaps when given a drink can't stop til drunk.<br>
Unless he figures out why he'd keep drinking when he'd had a violation, the behavior will crop up again. IMHO you should never assume a heavy drinker is not an alcoholic without facts to make that judgement.</p>

<p>I don't agree that two alcohol violations is any indication that this kid has a drinking problem. It means he was caught twice doing something that the university believes is a problem. I suspect there is more to the story. My son said he can't even imagine anyone being suspended from Penn for alcohol violations. However, another friend's son just got suspended from Colorado College as a junior for alcohol violations. It usually means the kid was PROVIDING alcohol to minors or bringing into dorms against the rules. I suspect the first offense was serious and the kid was on probation and did something else- could have been just being at a party that got busted.</p>

<p>He needs to take a look at why it was so important for him to have alcohol that he risked his education at Syracuse. THAT could indicate he has an alcohol problem. We need to know a lot more about the situation.</p>

<p>It he writes a good explanation for Tulane, he might get in despite he suspension. Schools are willing to look at things on an individual basis. My son's prep school took in a stellar kid last December who was booted out of an elite (THE elite) prep school for a serious, one-time alcohol offense mid-senior year. My son's school did a lot of investigating and discussing, and decided to take the kid in. He didn't disappoint and is now at Columbia.</p>

<p>"I don't agree that two alcohol violations is any indication that this kid has a drinking problem."</p>

<p>Well, duh, by definition he has a drinking problem. (He got suspended for a year, for heaven's sake!) The only real question is what kind?</p>

<p>Getting one violation, well it can happen. Getting two? either he's really really stupid or he has a problem. I think most schools after one violation require some sort of alcohol consuling or make available guidence. </p>

<p>While I don't 100% agree with mini all the time on this issue. In this case I think I do. There's a problem there that TWO citations (or whatever they're called) occurred. I'm sure the risk of getting thrown out WASN"T a surprize from the school. I'm sure they were upfront about it. So, knowing this, he continued anyway. I am not an expert on alcohol abuse, but I do understand consequences. </p>

<p>He may have trouble getting in elsewhere. I'm not sure. If I was Tulane or someone else, why would I take a student who is dumb enough to get two citations and suspended? Why should I take on this problem when I have so many other choices? </p>

<p>Now don't get mad, it's not personal. I don't know your brother, he may be a real nice guy who did just get caught. But, how well will admissions officers know him?</p>

<p>Mini: "Drinking problem" is merely a euphenism for alcoholism. </p>

<p>His brother is probably not an alcoholic; he was just merely unfortunate enough to get caught...twice. For all you know he could have only drunk twice and been caught on both occasions...unlikely, but it conveys my point. </p>

<p>Anyway, if evey student was suspened for drinking alcohol more than once than there would be very few students attending college and there would be many of what you seem to call "alcoholics".</p>

<p>Look. I deal with DUI data. For every time, the police arrest a DUI suspect, the suspect has been drinking and driving on average 20-30 times. </p>

<p>For all I know, he could have had a sip of a rare Cabernet just twice, and been in that perfect storm where he was caught both times, and maxed out on consequences. Or for all I know, he's been pickling his liver since he was 15. That's precisely why he needs an assessment and some counseling, and treatment if called for. And the issue of Tulane can wait - in fact, Tulane may be waiting for just such an assessment.</p>

<p>"Anyway, if evey student was suspened for drinking alcohol more than once than there would be very few students attending college and there would be many of what you seem to call "alcoholics".</p>

<p>The number of students suspended for drinking alcohol more than once is a tiny, tiny fraction of the students who will end up with liver cancer, cirrhosis, premature mortality, familial problems, child neglect issues, or alcohol-related motor vehicle accidents over the next 20 years.</p>

<p>I agree with mini....if he was already on probation, why in the world would he risk getting kicked out of school for a drink? and to get caught, well, shows he wasn't in controll....he may not be an alcoholic, yet, but he risked everthing to party...that in itself shows a problem...as an ault, one warning should be enough....</p>

<p>His priorities, at a minimum, need to be looked at...</p>

<p>"liver cancer, cirrhosis, premature mortality, familial problems, child neglect issues,"</p>

<p>Well, you can trust that I have experience with such calamities.</p>

<p>"The number of students suspended for drinking alcohol more than once is a tiny, tiny fraction of the students who will end up with liver cancer, cirrhosis, premature mortality, familial problems, child neglect issues, or alcohol-related motor vehicle accidents over the next 20 years"</p>

<p>I don't see your point as I was merely stating that if everyone who has had two drinks can be classed as an alcoholic then we would have an abundant if not interminable supply of them.</p>

<p>I didn't state he was an alcoholic. That's precisely why he should check it out.</p>

<p>At my alma mater (we're #1), 1 out 6 students are either already alcoholics or will be within the next 20 years. Higher for whites and males. The majority of those will have a hereditable link to the condition - something about which they have absolutely no control - and environmental influences will provide the opportunity for gene expression. Some folks can drink moderately. Some folks can binge drink (even often as students), with very little in the way of long-term consequences. Some can't.</p>

<p>He owes it to himself to find out. And I'd be surprised if Tulane didn't want to know as well.</p>

<p>We DON'T know the circumstances. A co-worker's daughter has been put on probation and will likely lose her ROTC scholarship for a semester due to ONE alcohol violation at a state school in the midwest. She went to a frat party and came back to the dorm drunk and got busted by her RA. Is she an alcoholic? She doesn't appear to be- but will be going to required alcohol education courses. Perhaps this young man had TWO such violations, or perhaps it is much more serious. If there is ANY indication that this behavior is something he can not control, I agree that he needs some substance abuse counseling and needs to examine how important his education is to him.
I personally think my son and his friends are drinking too much at college. It seems to be a big part of the culture there (an Ivy) and I just have to trust that he can manage himself and that it settles down some.</p>

<p>It is something he can't control, IMO....because he was already warned and it mattered not...that is not being in control...</p>

<p>I rolled through a stop sign about a year ago...got a sweet ticket....I am smart enough to NOT want another one, so I stop for probablly longer than I need to because I do not want another moving violation to deal with...</p>

<p>It may not be fair, the rules, but they are what they are, and the student knew the rules, and to risk so much shows there is an issue, whether it is alcohol or not....</p>

<p>Whatever issues/circumstances lead him to violate the rules again, knowing that he could get kicked out are something he needs to figure out, because those issues/circumstances are still there, and he needs assess what he wants in life. </p>

<p>If he blames the school for what happened and not himself, well, that shows he has some work to do.</p>

<p>I don't know all the circumstances, but no matter where he ends up-working or Tulane, I hope he at least gets serious and starts to think...his grades were good, so he isn't stupid, just had his priorities messed up</p>

<p>"I personally think my son and his friends are drinking too much at college. It seems to be a big part of the culture there (an Ivy) and I just have to trust that he can manage himself and that it settles down some."</p>

<p>Some will, and some won't. And often, for those for whom it won't, it is something not totally in their control without help.</p>