Can anyone please read my essay and give comments? =]

College Essays
1

<p>Hello~
I'm applying to transfer right now and would be great if you can please read it and give an honest feedback about it--regarding the adjustments I need to make and why. I would really appreciate it!!! thanks </p>

<p>p.s. I'm applying to UVA, illinois, fordham...if you attend any of these schools, can you also give me some advice as to what the admission committee would like on the application? =]</p>

2

<p>I can proof it for you</p>

3

<p>PM it to me. I’ll look it over.</p>

4

<p>thank you…i will send it asap</p>

5

<p>I’ll take a look.</p>

6

<p>thanks!!! i just emailed the essay…apparently it was too long to send it by Personal message lol</p>