Can someone give me feedback on my uc personal statement?

<p>Prompt 1 - Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.</p>

<p>Life is not always fair; some people just grow up in a better environment than others. I was raised in a dangerous neighborhood where theft, mugging, and extortion occurred frequently. Ever since I was a little child, I have always been cautious of my surroundings because anything can happen. Throughout my life I have been mugged by a man with a gun and had my house broken into. Over the course of these events, there has been fear and horror, but also I have risen to the occasion and become a strong-willed individual. Not many people have faced death in the face with guns to the head, or even watched an innocent person have his car keys stolen. However there are always ways to get out of horrible surroundings.
Many people say that the world that we live in shapes us into the type of person we are today depending on an excellent or awful environment. My environment has definitely affected me by how I think and feel. It is extremely hard to not be sucked in to a corrupt lifestyle, like doing drugs or committing crimes. However, an awful environment can also help one have the utmost dedication to getting out of this place. For example, I have seen people dealing drugs just for an extra buck or two, but I know this is the wrong way to get money so I just stay away from those people. The way I want to get successful is by pure hard work and dedication to school. This horrible neighborhood that I live in has shaped my dreams of becoming successful in my life. To achieve these dreams I must go to college and work the best of my ability. Once I become successful I can help my family out of our neighborhood and into a nice and desirable place.
Is it really true that people who live in a good environment always turn out better? I do not think so because they have not faced the real hardships and struggles of life. Every single night during my school years, I had to hear very unpleasant noises coming from the outside environment. I always try to avoid my neighborhood that is why I have always been active in school work and physical activities, like lifting. The hardships of my environment have caused me to be extremely determined to get out of this area, so my goal has already been set into place. The environment I live in is really like a double-edged sword there are favorable and unfavorable consequences. You get crime, corruption, and fear on one side and on the other side you get strong-will, courage, and determination. It may look like the unfavorable side outweighs the other, but if you look deeply into it you can see that favorable side builds an individual’s character and qualities. Building those qualities in a person can really get me further in life, than being scared all my life. I now feel that I am ready for college and have been provided the necessary skills to be successful in life.</p>