Can someone grade my essay please?

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Can someone grade my SAT essay please?</p>

<p>Prompt: Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority?</p>

<p>It is very important to question what the authorities claim to be true. Asking the authorities makes a society stronger and better. Moreover, questioning is the only way to detect flaws in a system and get them atoned. Several examples from history support this assertion.</p>

<p>Rosa Parks, often regarded as the ‘mother of freedom’ simply asked the conductor of the bus why should she stand when she paid the full-fare and boarded the bus before those white people who claim her seat to be theirs’. This action led to a revolutionary change in the history of black community. The bus boycott by the black people lasted 381 days and succeeded in transforming her initiative into an equality law.</p>

<p>Another example which supports my stand is of Nelson Mandela. Nelson Mandela questioned the colonizers, why the people of South Africa should be treated as slaves? His voice reached the billion hearts of South Africa and succeeded in bringing a revolution which ended with democracy being established in the country.</p>

<p>It is not that every time the authorities are wrong and we should not just start intriguing the authorities without having proper claim, evidence and support. No doubt, the path of change is difficult as Rosa Parks thrown into prison without a charge and Mandela had to spend 27 years of his life in prison, but if it is for a good cause, we will achieve success. Mahatma Gandhi has rightly said, “Be the change, you wish to see in the world.”</p>

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<p>ESSAY STRUCTURE: 2/6
This is just too short. Furthermore, what few words you have are about fifty too many because there’s lots of stuff you don’t need. (“Several examples from history support this assertion.” You don’t need to tell what’s about to happen in your essay. “Another example which supports my stand is of Nelson Mandela.” Your next sentence accomplishes the exact same purpose, so this one doesn’t need to be here.) You address the question but only superficially. Each body paragraph feels like a brief history lesson (one that doesn’t teach me anything I didn’t know).</p>

<p>VOCABULARY: 4/6 You generally use the right words in the right places. There just aren’t enough of them.</p>

<p>SYNTAX: 3/6 There are some unclear expressions as well as awkward and/or incorrect phrasings.</p>

<p>USAGE: 4/6 Not too many glaring errors but not too many glaring successes either.</p>