Can't help but feel defeated...

<p>Please don’t go through college the same way, I assume, you went through high school. That is, with your eyes on some prize (Wall St., Harvard grad school, etc.) without enjoying your life. Your dreams may change, other goals may inspire you. It is heartbreaking to read these posts from clearly talented young people who stand in the way of their own happiness.</p>

<p>This thread has truly run the gamut…sober, serious, self indulgent, comical, helpful, hurtful, HYPer, you name it…and I am sorry that the OP is so disappointed and has concluded, based on college acceptances/rejections that she is ‘average’ after all. I think she may have missed an important lesson during high school. “There is an important mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life-happiness, freedom and peace of mind-are always attained by giving them to someone else.” Peyton Conway March (1864-1955)</p>

<p>If you are fortunate enough to be able to sit at a computer and worry about prestige, or rather, being average, you need to log off and go do something nice for someone else. Keep working at ‘good deeds’ like you’ve worked at good grades and you’ll be surprised at how much better you’ll feel. I mean it. It works!</p>

<p>Wow, theshogun was really into this.</p>

<p>Amen, Barbara7.</p>

<p>to “theshogun” and others rejected with high stats. do NOT let this get in the way of your future ambitions. US colleges have an obsession with “the renaissance man” who plays sports, does pretty well in school, AND was student body president. but just because colleges use that selection criteria does not mean there isn’t a place for brilliant academics in the world.</p>

<p>an example would be law school. the main criteria are test scores and college grades (the other stuff matters a LITTLE but really not that much). you can go to a fourth tier institution and if you get the right stats, you are in, even at top schools like Harvard law. </p>

<p>another example would be the tech world. the people that are the most ambitious and talented at programming succeed. there are plenty of engineers out there w/o even a college degree, let alone an “ivy league” degree. </p>

<p>so hold your chin up high. you can still be successful in any number of paths from a slightly lower tiered institution. while same paths potentially have some obstacles, like wall st. investment banking at goldman sachs, you aren’t missing out too much as those paths usually require you to sell your soul for meaningless work :P.</p>

<p>To get rejected is something you need to prepare for, when you apply. Many kids apply to a good amount of school. And each kid has a different back round, story and grades. Sure its never fair to have a friend get somewhere, that you wanted. Does that mean they are smarter, well not always. I mean, people come from everywhere to go to school in the US. And you need to see that the IVY’s are going to get them more then lets say your less known or not IVY colleges. As a Hispanic i can say that I was rejected. Sometimes its not what we see, the person being. but what the college sees. so you didnt get into and IVY when you the best of the best. well sadly there are a lot of people who think they are the smartest or brightest.
The fact you applied to an IVY shows you took a risk. There are millions of kids who apply. but the fact is its what you make of it. If you get into some other college that well isn’t IVY, its someone else goal or dream to get in there.
Just like BostonEng said you could do great and still not be in an IVY for undergrad, but land there if you make the best out of it. For graduate school.
Not everything is grades and GPA and SATs that now but plan for what you want after thats what you can go for.
The kids who get in get in for a reason. We dont know why they were picked we can only guess and wonder. but what good will it do. the college told you their answer. so plan to make the college wish they had. by doing your best striving for the next best thing.
But remember rejection isnt the end, its just a bump you have to go around for now.</p>

<p>The Shogun, no offense brah, but I think that you need to remember that without the terrific athletes, a college sort of becomes one-dimensional in only really academics. Also, you’re really competitive! That sort of attitude just won’t fly at top schools.</p>

<p>My post here is as a personal note- not official opinion in any way.</p>

<p>Rejection is a part of life, and yes, it stings. It does not mean you’re not intelligent, or won’t be successful. Success is about who you are, what motivates you, and how you use the tools available to you- not about the school you go to. As an intelligent person (and as has been pointed out in this thread repeatedly), you know that being rejected from ivies when you know people that got in means next to nothing. As with any huge applicant pool and a very small number of spots, there are a lot (LOT) of perfectly intelligent, great on paper applicants that will not be accepted. That’s what makes ivy-league admissions ivy-league admissions, and it’s the same kind of thing you’ll encounter if you look at medical schools, law schools, and other top professional and graduate programs. It’s also how scholarship programs work too- I’ve worked with students I really liked with phenomenal stats that apparently didn’t have the right tone of essay or interview to get the scholarship that it appeared, on paper, they would get. All of that said- there’s no point in letting this be a big negative point in your life, since it likely won’t affect your future success (unless you let it). There are a lot of great schools out there you can go to, find a program that fits you and challenges you, and let this be the start of the exciting new chapter in your life it should be. Thousands of people, and students, won’t get into the school, or grad program, or job they thought they wanted or “deserved” (a sense of entitlement is dangerous, but hard for an intelligent student to avoid- I’ve been there, so I do understand), but that doesn’t mean they won’t be successful, or even more successful than the person who did get into the school/program/job in the first place- it’s all about how you respond and how you make your way forward from here on out. Good luck to you, and I hope that you’ll find a school and honors program that fits you. In a few months, you’ll be having fun, being challenged, and this little inconvenience will be the last thing on your mind.</p>

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<p>Yes, it is. It shocks me that people on this site don’t seem to be capable of being genuinely happy for their friends, and that freaks me out.</p>

<p>^I read in a poem somewhere that only 50% of people are truly capable of happiness, and the more that I think about it, the more I believe it.</p>

<p>The Shogun
The world looks at those schools differently, but who cares? some guy you meet in a 5 minute conversation? And athletes are more deserving than anyone else to go to those schools. Job employers are the ones that know what schools give what education, and those are the ones who really matter when it comes to what college you went to. He can dribble a ball across a court better than you and you can write the correct numbers on a test better than him. Which one does everyone want to see?</p>

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<p>That sounds about right, this forum is making me lose hope in our generation (although this might not be a generational thing).</p>

<p>I believe many rejected applicants can’t help but probe themselves for the reason why they were rejected and ruminate over finding explanations because there is no objective, published criteria for college admissions. From an objective POV, the college admissions process, esp. at top schools, is nebulous and lacks any oversight. I know this firsthand as a student who has been rejected by the Ivy League but accepted at another top school. Top schools say they are looking for “well rounded” candidates and then give you a laundry list of things that count: academics, sports, essays, motivation, personality, contribution to diversity, etc. A the same time, I have not found any real data on who really gets accepted. No one, for example, really knows how many legacies there are or how “need-blind” the admissions process really is. All the information comes from the colleges themselves.</p>

<p>Making the process more objective would entail publishing an objective formula for college admissions along with real admissions information to compare it to. Real information should be collected by independent, third-party observers, possibly as a result of legislation.That way, you would know once and for all where you stand and whether your SATs were too low, GPA too low, not enough, volunteering, or whether a sports player or legacy candidate “took your seat”, or whether it’s just chance.</p>

<p>Bro/Girl, you like Of Montreal, so you’re already a winner</p>

<p>Okay, if you want to feel better just get on youtube and watch video clips from “Justice”, Michael Sandel’s famous lecture course at Harvard. Some of the contributions from these Harvard students are just mind-bogglingly stupid. That’s right, some of the “best and brightest” are actually, as it turns out, somewhat less than bright. Truly.</p>

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This is the kind of attitude that worries me. It’s true that a NBA player probably make more money than a Noble Prize winner, but at the end of the day who create more wealthy for the society? Who make our living standard higher with all the new inventions? Some say that the best days of USA are behind us, I don’t believe it, but with this kind attitude, I’d say the nay sayers have a valid point.</p>

<p>“Top schools say they are looking for “well rounded” candidates”</p>

<p>That’s actually not completely true. What top colleges want are well rounded student bodies. This means some well rounded students, and a lot of students who are lopsided: have pursued a couple of passions in depth and with success, but definitely aren’t well rounded.</p>

<p>Wow, i think post #198 is amazing. Maybe it’s because i strongly identify with the OP and others in the situation of getting rejected from the ivy of their choice. I feel like some people on this thread are ignoring reality, saying its silly to do everything in high school only to get into college. However, this is the world we live in. If you want to get accepted to an ivy, you have to make that decision before the beginning of your freshmen year. You have to carefully map out all of your courses, your activities, etc and work your ass off for four years. You must sacrifice everything from sleep to time with friends to make your dream a reality. During high school, you justify this crazy schedule because you think it will all be worth it when you get that coveted acceptance letter. So, when you read that rejection letter after doing all of this, you feel angry and confused, especially when you see other people that clearly worked less hard than you get an acceptance. It’s devastating, and unless you have ever been put in this position, you should not judge.</p>

<p>Actually, there are many people who don’t sacrifice their lives in order to get into Ivies. They happily pursue their academic and EC interests, enjoy their friends, and it just so happens that the way that they live their lives makes places like Ivies good fits for them.</p>

<p>If they live their lives like that and don’t get into Ivies, they still are happy because they did activities in high school that fulfilled themselves.</p>

<p>The students who grit their teeth and force themselves to do what they think Ivies want are the students who probably are likely to be very disappointed senior year and to feel that they wasted their high school lives.</p>

<p>^^ very good points although I’d say some who grind their teeth do get into the Ivies.</p>