Choosing a BS because of a sport — Pro/Con

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
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<p>PhotographerMom mentioned in another thread that one of her kids chose a particular BS for its ability to let him pursue a specific sport (something outside the school-supported sports). However, over the years, I've also heard advice to the contrary...from the "don't choose a school because of a sport" camp.</p>

<p>Wanted to have a dedicated thread to hear both sides of the argument...especially from parents with kids who have done so and regretted it — or done so and loved it.</p>

<p>FYI, my interest in starting this thread isn't purely academic. As we put together the list of "apply to" schools with my younger daughter this fall, the ability for her to continue competing in a niche sport offered by very few boarding schools is important to both her and her parents.</p>

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<p>If the sport is done in an off-campus setting, it will be very hard to do it from a BS due to transportation and time needs. Most BSs are in remote places so you need to travel a lot back and forth. Best would be a local day school where parents can shuttle the kid around. Even if the sport is practiced on-campus, I’m not sure how much support you can get from the BS as they have their established sports and the faculty have trifecta of responsibilities. Not impossible, but hard to do. Unless you are recruitable in the sport, it’s better to go to a school where there is an academic fit. Many kids playing sports are not recruited anyways.</p>

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<p>Thanks pwalsh. I’m also open to hearing about experiences with school-supported sports, but still where the decision is influenced made based on sports — though I know that academic fit is paramount.</p>

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<p>NE BSs do well in recruitable sports as they play in good leagues with other schools and have a track record of placements. The higher the school’s endowment, the better their support for sports in general. Most athletes come prepared to BS (trained by pro-trainers), the value-add from BS is not much as the teachers are not great coaches, like pro-trainers are.</p>

<p>Depending on the sport, Deerfield, Salisbury, Brooks, Exeter have good programs.</p>

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<p>My son didn’t pick a BS for a sport, but he wouldn’t consider a school that didn’t compete in his sport…if that makes sense. While he ultimately did get recruited, that possibility wasn’t even a blip on our radar when he was in 8th grade and we were researching BSs. We just knew he loved to play, he was a much more motivated, energetic and happy student when he was playing and to take it off the table for a more “prestigious” (oh how I hate that word) school seemed like it wouldn’t work to his benefit at all.</p>

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<p>I might look at the question in reverse. How happy would the student be if she couldn’t participate in her sport, or for that matter any other activity central to how she sees herself?</p>

<p>I wouldn’t choose a school solely based on one sport, but as one of many criteria I think it’s a perfectly valid way of narrowing your list.</p>

<p>My daughter felt strongly that she wanted to continue her niche sport, that is until she suffered a recurring injury exacerbated by that sport in particular. Had she not had an opportunity to participate for two years in BS she would have felt it as a loss and I think she would have resented the school, and possibly her parents for encouraging her to give up the sport cold turkey. She’s now resigned to the fact that she can’t play her sport at a high level, but she’s picked up another as her “main sport.”</p>

<p>I think the question can be applied to more than just sports. Would you send your violinist to a school with no orchestra or string quartet? Would your potter be happy at a school with no kiln?</p>

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<p>Tx JoBenny & Sue22 for sharing your thoughts/experiences.</p>

<p>“How happy would the student be if she couldn’t participate in her sport, or for that matter any other activity central to how she sees herself?”</p>

<p>This is such an important question…that we have asked and will continue to ask. Our version is “If you got injured or burnt out pursuing your sport at the highest level…would School X still be a great place to be for you?”</p>

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<p>And that is, of course, the most important question to be asking.</p>

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<p>All prestigious schools do have sports because BSs are founded on the principle of providing a well-rounded education (AAA - Academics, Arts, Athletics).</p>

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<p>^True. But they may not have the sport your (general) child wants to play. Ice Hockey, crew, golf, squash, field hockey, track events…</p>

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<p>Not sure if this applies to your daughter, SevenDad, but I’ll add it anyway for the benefit of those reading this thread…</p>

<p>Be cautious about looking only at the schools strongest in your child’s sport unless he or she is truly outstanding. The athletic ability of the student body in general at prep schools tends to be much higher than that of most middle schools. That kid who was the captain of her varsity middle school team may sit the JV bench her freshman year at a school with strong sports, and if the school recruits for sports it’s possible she’ll continue to be superseded by athletically talented incoming students in subsequent years.</p>

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<p>If the school has PGs, it will be even harder to get on the V/JV teams. Beware of redshirted athletes also if your s/d is on the younger side.</p>

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<p>Another question to ponder…can you be sure that a sport your kid loves at 12/13 will be the sport he/she still loves at 17? You might find, as we did, that that the child finds an entirely new passion at the boarding school, something not even remotely on the horizon right now. </p>

<p>It’s interesting–as I think about my son’s boarding school app versus the college app, they share only one e.c.–and it’s not one he plans to continue into college. </p>

<p>The issue, as I see it is with sports that are only offered at a limited number of schools, thus limiting your bs options. My advice would be to look at those schools, for sure, but visit and interview at other schools that fit in other ways as well.</p>

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<p>S was a sports recruit. I remember wanting to pull my hair out during school tours because S only wanted to consider schools that had a turf field. I reminded him that if he got an injury and could no longer play his sport, would he still see himself happy at the school? Answer was always yes.
Fast forward to now - S did have injuries and was sidelined, lost interest in that sport and transferred to a BS school that was academically and socially a better fit. He’s now a team captain of a different sport.
I will also add that H and I were very pleased with 1st school and would have loved to see S graduate there. Another example of what is interesting to an 8th grader changes for a 10th/11th grader.
My advice to future BS families, go for the buffet instead of the fixed menu.</p>

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<p>A bit of a side note, but also still somewhat relevant. I was surprised during our visits to different boarding schools how different the philosophies were about varsity teams. Contrary to what it was like when I was in BS, there are many schools now where the varsity teams (at least in the more common sports) end up being essentially reserved just for the athletes that get recruited. If you’re not talented enough to make varsity as a 9th grader, or at the latest 10th grade, then you’re not likely to ever make varsity. We found it very refreshing to hear several of the coaches at Hotchkiss say that they still agree with the more old school view that as kids mature and develop they can work their way up to varsity teams. One way to suss this out, besides asking the coaches, is to look at the team rosters, which many schools post on their athletic team webpages. If you see a varsity team that has a number of 9th and 10th graders on it, odds are that the school falls into the new model.</p>

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<p>I could not agree more with CM, Muf and soxmom. A parent always worries that they might be discouraging the latent Olympian or future pro athlete etc if they don’t clear a path toward that goal. (Disclaimer: my kids had no star athlete gene to promote, at least to my knowledge.) But, interests really do change during adolescence and it seems smart to play those odds and select a boarding school that will maximize the likelihood that your child will have entirely new experiences and opportunities. Such exposure, aside from revealing new and unpredictable interests, will do wonders for promoting an essential orientation for exploring the unknown. What could be better than seeing your kid take a lifelong pleasure in “getting up to bat?”</p>

<p>Soxmom raises another point that affected our thinking, and about which there has been much debate these last many years on CC: does a small school choice increase the likelihood that your child will meaningfully participate in the new experiences you dream about them having? The bigger the school, the more specialized and advanced the extracurricular skills will be in every area: athletics, musicianship etc. Yes, it’s fantastic to watch a battle of the titans on the playing field or hear a world-class chamber piece, but if you want to maximize the chance that your above-average, non-Olympian child will have a REALISTIC chance to be a varsity athlete or join the top chamber group, a smaller school seems like a smart choice. (Disclaimer: I favor the small boarding school, big University path.)</p>

<p>And lastly, I think it’s great when West Coast parents send their kids East to BS and vice versa. The very different cultural milieus of the coasts are wonderful learning experiences.</p>

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<p>Thanks for the input, all. It’s definitely a hot topic chez Seven this fall.</p>

<p>The “will she start Varsity as a frosh” issue is something that I’ve mulled over and over. While her performance in national-level competitions suggests she is an impact player who could start her first year, I think about the Seniors who have been waiting and working for years to get a chance to start for the Varsity squad. How would they feel about some Frosh taking their slot? So while I would want my daughter to get a chance to be a “difference maker” for a school’s team all four years…I can understand that a coach might not make that decision. I wonder if she would be as understanding.</p>

<h2>Interestingly, I think all of the input above points to us expanding our “to consider” set. Plenty of time before apps are due, right? ;-P</h2>

<p>Note that we have never considered ourselves that “sporty” of a family, so all of this is new ground for us. We’ll be leaning on advice of local club coach as well.</p>

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<p>I have two kids that share the same sport. This is the best way I can describe their school search: K1 wanted the elite all-inclusive luxury sports package while K2 grabbed his backpack and went off-road.</p>

<p>On a “Safety School” thread (of all places- Sorry OP!!), I shared how K2 chose a Gem over a highly selective “Dream” largely because he wanted the freedom and lifestyle to pursue his sport outside of school. He wanted the best of all worlds and I think he found it- and for the record, so does he.</p>

<p>I don’t want anyone to think his school search was based on sports. It wasn’t. It was a very important piece, but overall comfort and academics always came first. His home coach was wonderful and strongly reinforced those two critical factors. Life first- sports second.</p>

<p>And (of course) as a family, we had numerous conversations about being content/happy at a school even if (God forbid) there’s an injury or he decides to leave the sport. We made sure he weighed everything carefully (including potential burn out)- even up until the last second before we mailed the deposit check.</p>

<p>I think when a young person is surrounded by older world class athletes (that’s not meant to sound snooty) they become more keenly aware of the window they have to become dominant in their sport. K2, (perhaps more than K1) saw this and came up with a plan so he could work toward his goals. </p>

<p>We knew we had to find a BS Athletic Director (and coaches) who were flexible (tall order) and a BS team that was competitive enough, so he wouldn’t feel like it wasn’t a meaningful experience and he was just spinning his wheels. And (because he trains/competes year-round) he also needed other sports that would compliment his chosen sport- for conditioning purposes mostly.</p>

<p>For clarity, K2 does participate in all school required sports and with the AD’s help stays within training quidelines at all times. We’re extremely careful about that.</p>

<p>He doesn’t feel like he’s comprimised anything (Dream vs Gem- or wahtever), and so far everything has worked out very well. Better than I imagined- that’s for sure. He is VERY tired, but I know he’s happy and very grateful for all the support. </p>

<p>From a parent’s perspective, I’m happy, too. It’s been a crazy journey and a complete leap of faith, but it really has worked out. I’d rather see K2 do it his way now then live with some measure of regret later on. We all know about risks and benefits- so we’ll just have to see how it goes…</p>

<p>All the best, SevenDad!</p>

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<p>Thanks for chiming in Photographer Mom. I started this thread in large part because of your post on that thread…and because you (wisely?) have opted out of PMs here on CC.</p>

<p>Would love to correspond more, if you care to.</p>

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<p>Re #15, I think it depends upon the school; families should not leap to conclusions.</p>

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<p>Many of the schools we visited had more restrictive requirements for 9th and 10th graders than upperclassmen. Juniors and seniors were required to play fewer seasons per school year. So a varsity team with freshmen and sophomores might not mean the team was manned by recruited students–the upperclassmen might be happily doing theater or yoga instead.</p>

<p>In some contact sports, such as boys’ lacrosse, I would worry about a 9th grader playing against juniors and seniors. It can be healthier for a student to work on skills against other players who are not much taller, heavier and stronger than he.</p>