I understand the aggravation. S found out he was academically rejected from one school after the head of the MT department emailed to welcome him to the program and congratulate him on his scholarship. S had heard nothing so he responded asking about it. One thing led to another and the head of MT eventually came back and said that he was sorry he’d jumped the gun and that S hadn’t actually been admitted.
The next day, S got an email from another person in the MT program congratulating him and asking if he had any questions about the program. Talk about salt in the wound.
Have to ask. What is up with al the AMDA emails? My D never applied and I keep getting emails almost every day. The “Deadline” passed so I thought they’d stop. But now getting emails saying “the deadline has been extended for your VIP application!” Feels like TV ads: But wait there’s more!!!
@daughtersdreams I agree with your comment that these schools should show all their applicants common courtesy. I just posted a similar comment in a Hartt thread, since my D has not heard anything since her Chicago audition. I agree with others who suggested you call Wayne. My D auditioned for 3 Pace programs, so 3 times I heard Wayne’s spiel - “I personally make sure every letter - acceptance, WL, or rejection - gets mailed on time.” I would not be at all embarrassed to let Wayne know that did not happen in your case.
@daughtersdreams Yes we did get a rejection, but just a few days ago, Wednesday I believe. She was accepted academically in the winter so we got the big “yes” back then. You should definitely call. It’s so aggravating. We still never heard from CalArts, but I’m sure it’s a no, yet, if you’re not going to send an official rejection, give us our application fee back! Right?
@evitasmom I am sorry that your D does not feel good about her acceptance. I don’t know which school it is but I do know that even ONE MT acceptance is a win. I wish I could help your D understand this. Seriously, the training at almost all of the BFA schools is excellent. I hope that she comes around and gives it a shot. Some of the kids at my D’s school are there because it was their only option. Some jumped in and gave it their all and absolutely love it. Others did the minimum and are not getting anywhere. Some dropped out. No matter where you go, it is up to you to make it work.
So after some time needed to reflect and move on my D has returned to feeling good about her options as she should and her enthusiasm for her top pick is returning as she is beginning to see again how it checks all of her boxes. I don’t think even any of her waiting list schools could top it so I’m hopeful a final decision will be coming soon!
I have an audition for Millikin next weekend. Anyone have insight? I’ve read some negative things on this board that is kind of scary but some of it was from 2008. Anyone have info or positive things or more negative things to say about it? Feel free to PM
@evitasmom we are in exactly the same boat. Only one other acceptance at this point but lots of no’s from the schools she thought validated her talent. Nothing I say helps. I think I need to give her the space to think things through a few days as well. I’m in tears. I can totally relate.
@missnypizza just want to say I feel for you. “I’m in tears” made me so sad. My D had an early and devasting (to her) rejection early in her process last year. It was awful to see her so upset. I hope for you and your daughter (and all the kids and parents in similar situations) that time brings some perspective and peace with her options. These kids are pretty awesome to make it through this. They are fighters and survivors. They will come out stronger in the end.
Take hope from the many stories on here of kids attending schools they didn’t initially want to go to but ended up not only thriving at, but loving the school too.
The favorite story told at USC is the one where Steven Spielberg was rejected omission 3 times. Yes, THE STEVEN SPIELBERG was rejected to their acclaimed film school, not once, but 3 times. After his success (and after he attended a different film school), he went back to USC not to gloat but rather to contribute, financially and by teaching classes. In fact, he donated so mightily that his building sits directly across from alum George Lucas. It’s the story of resilience, and the USC students love that story, not because he was rejected, but rather because he embodies their motto - Fight On, even though he wasn’t educated at their school.
I know this sounds all hokey, but it’s the true story of where you go to school doesn’t define you. My heart is sad for all of you whose kids are feeling defeated/sad. It’s never easy as their parent bc we want to take the sadness away, immediately.
There’s no easy switch here to make them happy, but time and attitude seem like the key. Even Steven Spielberg was rejected multiple times. Hugs to you all.
While I absolutely believe that the best parenting leads us to become cheerleaders for our children’s dreams, I also do believe that dreams change.
I think it’s important that parents step back enough and make sure that their disappointed children, talented or not, still want what they originally set out to achieve.
For some, it’s possible that this particular rollercoaster ride has less appeal now that they’ve been through it. And this is only the beginning. There are plenty of kids who switch majors and change career paths as they go off to college and get more of an idea of what they would be doing in the real world. And the college audition process has been eye opening for most.
Sometimes we get so caught up in the original plan and all that has gone into getting our children prepared, that we don’t stop to question if they are still on board.
I think parents need to step out of the cheerleader role enough to ask their kids if they still want this. And make sure that you tell them they are not weak or disappointments if they’ve changed their minds.
@uskoolfish this is such a great post. So very true. Thank you for saying what may be hard for so many to accept. This is something to think deeply about
There is also a great story regarding Kyle Dean Massey ( Pippin, Wicked) who tells in a video online about his story of auditioning for colleges and using the song from Pippin ( Corner of the Sky) and getting rejected from every school …lol
While using that song as his audition song!
He ended up at Missouri State and well we know how this ends…he was in Pippin!
@uskoolfish great post - we just went through this. As I mentioned in my Final Decisions thread - in the beginning of the process I insisted my D had some non-MT programs she was applying to (Arts Admin) - we discussed the realities of pursuing MT and the odds of really making it in the business. She is talented, but so are most kids that are taking this path - and there are others that are already superstars and probably could go right to Broadway. She breezed through auditions feeling pretty good, but once the rejections started rolling in the reality also started setting in. At the end of the process she was really questioning if MT was the path she wanted to take. She has decided to attend a college she really loves, and was WL for MT. She feels that whether or not she comes off the WL it will be the best school for her to thrive - and her path will become clearer once she starts in the fall. It is great to dream big, but I agree, this process is brutal for the kids and sometimes THEY decide on their own that maybe this isn’t what they really want. As a parent, this is not a path I would have wanted my D to to take. She is very, very smart and capable of doing just about anything - but I support her decisions because this is about her, not me. She came to me and said she was confused and questioning everything - I offered words of support, encouraged her to keep an open mind and know that she will find the path she was meant to take, even if it isn’t clear to her now. Wishing everyone out there going through this the best of luck!
This process does take the wind out of my (our) sails. Limping to the end and waiting for one more decision- likely a no and really, at this point-that’s fine. Our household is alternating with giddy relief that my D has choices to sadly mourning the schools that could have been. Starting to really look at the dollar and cents reality of some of the schools and kind of questioning why we auditioned??? I feel for all the kids auditioning and not getting the results they want and deserve. I wish we could all swap acceptances and wait lists like trading cards… I’ll trade you a James Madison “yes” for your Shenandoah “yes” and throw in my Elon waitlist… We could have everything sorted out by April 15th.
@uskoolfish@LBSMOM Thanks for putting this out there. It’s wonderful to support our kids dreams, and CC is a great place to bolster our own resources and energy for supporting them. No doubt about it. But it’s also easy to get caught up so deeply in the process and the cheerleading that we are less able to step back. And our kids may be afraid of disappointing us along the way. My D and I have had several conversations - beginning, middle and now end - about my support for her education whether she wants to perform, teach theatre, work at a music store, or something completely different. Sometimes to her yeah-I-know-mom attitude, I remind her that her worth to me and to herself is not based on where she gets in or what she wants to do.
It’s also worth taking the lessons of rejections as a chance to re-evaluate. Some students may be now seeing where they fit on a broader scale of competition. Some will see a wake-up call of work they need to do. Others will brush it off as part of the business and move on. The audition process can foster an insight that may not be pleasant, but may be necessary as part of their growth. As parents we have as much responsibility to let them work through the difficult truths as we do to support their dreams. It’s just hard to do sometimes.
I believe most rank CMU and UIUC about the same in computer engineering - near or at the top. Congrats! Therefore I would say if academics and money are your criteria, go to UIUC.