<p>Don't know whether to laugh or cringe reading this thread, as I was a MOG the first time and am/will be a MOS the second time around. I did find, though, that fall semester sr year my daughter, whose ability to procrastinate rivals that of any boy, got caught up in the college app frenzy at school and actually finished all her apps early. I'm just wondering what I'm in for with the second. Fortunately he's so clearly destined to be an engineer that we can eliminate any college that doesn't have a School of Engineering. Makes it a little easier, I guess.</p>
<p>momoschki - if there are more college visits in your future, here is a tip I remember from another MOS that I thought was quite good for our reticent sons (came in after <em>our</em> college visits were through, so I didn't get to use it): </p>
<p>She made a deal with her S that she had only one requirement from him after each college visit: she would not start up the car to drive away from the campus until he had spoken one (ONE!) sentence about his reaction to the place. She said she found that he was pithy, off-beat... but that his reactions were in actuality very insightful.</p>
<p>^^^ jmmom,</p>
<p>Yes, this would appear to be a clever way of getting around the issue, but my son would probably be likely to supply a "sentence" along the lines of,"It was ok, I guess."</p>
<p>It's pretty mind blowing: this from a person who is otherwise very articulate and always has an opinion about absolutely everything.</p>
<p>Alumother: Yup, absolutely true that women have two language centers and men only one. Yeah, if I have a stroke and one is destroyed, there may still be one I can talk from!</p>
<p>Boys feelings have to traverse thicker dividing membrane in the brain to link up with words.</p>
<p>Didn't seem to hurt Shakespeare any (or Dante or or or, you get the idea.)</p>
<p>By accident this summer I found the perfect college visit recipe:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Take along a friend.</p></li>
<li><p>Let them do most of the driving, especially the hairy parts.</p></li>
<li><p>Make sure to visit a theme park along the way.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>On a whim another mom and I took our rising juniors on a college visit road trip down the coast of Calif. It was a great success on a number of levels, and even though the verbal feedback was monosyllabic, I started to get a sense of what he liked and didn't like about the various schools. The day at the theme park made the boys soooooo much happier about being in the car with us.</p>
<p>Agree with you momoschki, stay away from ED. Your son is not ready for that commitment. 99% of kids aren't, to be honest.</p>
<p>Of course he's confused, it's a huge decision with way too many factors to sort out! Teenaged brains are just beginning to move beyond the ability to reason in black-and-white.</p>
<p>The "its too flat" comment rings true. My son eventually ruled out any school that did NOT have a flat grassy "quad"-like area. I think that it was just that he wanted that village-type atmosphere that a campus centered around a quad provides. "Its too flat" is your son's way of telling you and himself that something about it doesn't feel right to him.</p>
<p>My son found it helpful to make himself a sort of checklist. On the left side of a page, he listed all the factors that seemed to matter to him (this list got longer as we visited more schools), and under a column for each school listed what that school had or didn't have for each factor. In the end, after he got his acceptances and returned to the schools for one last look, for each factor he circled the entry he liked the best, and added up the scores (by the time he did this he had narrowed it to 2 schools). He is happily attending the school that "won" 21 - 13.</p>
<p>MarinMom- great idea, I'm going to use it when I take the sophomore out next year.</p>
<p>We usually combined college tours with family vacations/visiting friends/going skiing and snowboarding. That plan worked great for s#1, but unfortunately not so well with s#2. As many of you know, we had a 5 day tour of the hospital instead, though did still manage to get to the colleges (divide and conquered)</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Well, the exact quote was, "Dad, these are my people," but you were close.</p>
<p>Unlike the experiences of others who have posted, I thought the one college-visit trip we took with a friend of S's was the least productive.</p>
<p>Could be only because the schools we visited were not tremendous fits for S, but I did notice that S and his friend sort of talked each other into liking/not liking aspects of the schools that might not have been perceived the same ways had they visited them separately.</p>
<p>Well, we are still circling the ED question. S has now seemingly abandoned school #1 as an ED choice and announced on his own last night that he is seriously considering applying ED now to school #2. I would not be surprised if he changes his mind again (and again.)</p>
<p>Perhaps the biggest surprise came last night when he presented me with his completed main essay and asked me to "mark it up" with my comments and corrections. We were able to engage together in a civil and productive conversation about its content and how to improve it. He is also giving it to a favorite English teacher, so all is well in that department.</p>
<p>Today he had a meeting with the college counselors at school. When I, mistakenly believing that we had now gotten over a major hump in this process, asked him how it went, I got back, "Okay... can't you think about ANYTHING else? All you do is think and talk about this 24/7."</p>
<p>Alas, back on that roller coaster...</p>
<p>Nah, just business as usual with son applying to college. I know you can't see it now, but it actually sounds like it's going well: essay written, counseling session attended, options being considered. You're just in the middle of labor (horrible, grueling process) only this time what you're going to have when you're finished is a baby.....in college!</p>
<p>mythmom,</p>
<p>Fittingly, I was in labor for 2 days and then had to have a C-Section! I have a feeling that this process will be no less arduous and drawn out (but without the epidural.)</p>
<p>Well said, mythmom!</p>
<p>I have exactly the opposite of most. My S knows exactly where he wants to go. So much in fact, that he took a summer course from the school, and a sport camp as well. He walked on to the campus and said, yes, this is me...
Plans to apply ED. Brainstorming every thing about the application. Applying to 2 of the University's college which means 3 essays to be done. Wears the sweatshirt, the t-shirts and all... He always has a very postive outlook on life and just believes he will be there for the next 4 years. He tells me often, dont worry mom I will be going there. But my worry... it's a reach school for him...</p>
<p>I have taken him to 20+ schools to look at, and not one even comes close to being somewhere he wants to be. I lay awake at night worrying about this.... ( sorry if this should have been posted on parent site)</p>
<p>Good one, mythmom! So we'll all try to remember to consider this coming December "transition."</p>
<p>Sammy2, yours is a tough spot right now. He might be right, but can you perhaps get him to finish that app completely and then move his attention onto some other schools? Or let him read some of the books about safety strategies? I feel for you.</p>
<p>sammy2...
Sounds like gestation to me, with the due date about December 15th. Good luck to you and yours!</p>
<p>No all its more like PuPPs if anyone knows what a horrible condition that is,it starts late and doesnt end until delivery... The worst part about it, I have always told him to work really hard and good things will happen. He has done everything that has been ask of him. He topped out of math and sciences in 11th grade. He finished Lang 5 by the the first term of 11th grade. He will finish HS with 5 AP. He worked in Latin American orphanages. He tutor a Latin Am girl in elem & middle & HS for 2 weeks for the past 6 years. He has been in 50+ countries that he has studied since kinder. Has a real understanding of the world around him. He relates very well as an internationalist. He can close his eyes and see the pryramids, know what the Valley of the Kings are really like, see the Middle East, and knows it is not all war but malls and people as us. See & know what rainforest feel like. Driven thru all of Austraila. Walked thru coffee plantations in Central American, Floated the waters with the river people of Thailand.... tasted the smells of India... You name it, he been there... but the real travesty... he cant even use any of this as an essay for if you read...travel is the # 1 big no, no. GRRRRRRR !!!!</p>
<p>sammy2,
Yup, admissions people will read it that he's rich.
Can he distill an insight from these experiences that is personal and resonant? Not a cliche, like "I learned that all people, rich and poor are alike, despite our differences, etc."
I'm sure he can.
But at bottom, the result is beyond us. And not a life sentence either. Easy for me to say after having my daughter "cross over" this year.
And who knows if she will be happy at her chosen school?
Guess what? We love them and it never ends.</p>
<p>And guess what, we 're not rich... it is just part of H job.</p>