College supp essay help-SBU

<p>The task was to evaluate a significant experience and its effect on you, this is my first draft, please help me out. Any advice is great :D</p>

<hr>

<pre><code> I was never a fan of the vast and mysterious ocean waters. Especially when the sky was dimming. One could just sit on the edge of the beaches and wonder; what’s below the mass invasion of blue hue? Not sure if I was ready to scuba dive, I told my uncle to go first as I was hesitant. “Come on, what are you scared for? There’s a whole lot to see in here!”
I was 9 and like most other children; afraid of ghost. Maybe it’s because of their unknown identity. As I was ready to plunge, I gave my headlight a tap. “Why do we need this?” I mean, why would we need any light, we’re just diving right? “Now, now you wouldn’t want to be lost in the darkness would you?” Those words struck me , leaving me petrified. He laughed and pulled me in the waters and it quickly engulfed me. I was trapped in the eternal tenebrosity until I heard “Turn on the light!”
“Click.” Immediately a whole new world emerged upon me. Hundreds of different species appeared before my eyes. Orange sponges, bright red corals, radiant fishes with a palette of colors. I was in awe of my surroundings. Never in my life have I seen such elegance and beauty. I was a kid with a new toy, excited and oblivious to my uncles remarks. I wondered why I was so intimidated by the gloomy ocean when beneath was brilliance within grasp.
I used to be afraid of what I’m unable to see. Scared because you wouldn’t know what to expect. But that dive was an unforgettable moment. It let me realize that what I was really scared of is myself and the mind games in my head. Ghost, darkness, monsters; they’re visions that I’ve depicted them to be. I remember my parents telling me “go to bed early so the boogeyman won’t get you!” I look back to these times and chuckle. Instead of running away from mysteries; I want to reveal them. I want to be a scientist.
</code></pre>