No time to read the other comments, but I see a lot of problems. Why did she apply only to 4 colleges? She should have at least 2 safeties. Why the out of state public colleges? Why were the finances such a surprise–this should be researched before applying. Why didn’t she apply to some schools that might have given her large merit scholarships? I’d think about all this in formulating a new list.
Also the colleges see the grading scale of each high school.
And stop blaming the world. This info is readily available on this site and elsewhere. You don’t just apply for 4 jobs, some of which you may be questionably qualified for, some of which don’t pay well enough by your standards, and then blame everyone else when you don’t get an offer you like.
Oh, also, why no prep for some of the most important exams she’ll ever take? 4 years of hard work in the classes, but entrance exams taken cold when shooting for some of the most competitive colleges in the country? Not wise.
In my opinion, the take home message in this thread…even if your kid attends a great boarding school, YOU, the parent, should have active involvement in the college search and application process. It sounds like this family expected the school to do all of the work. Then they were surporsed with the outcome.
I feel like there are important, missing details in this story.
I am completely baffled by this thread, the choice of colleges, and the lack of preparation/guidance. The schools have very little in common. Was your daughter looking for a big university? medium? urban? certain curriculum?
I hope you discussed this situation with the college counseling office. They should have made certain you had an affordable safety- as much for their reputation as for your expectations.
Why didn’t she apply to your state school as a back up? There are many many schools around the nation which would have given merit $ for a 30 ACT and 3.75 GPA. I’m stunned by Illinois and wonder if there was some mistake or incomplete application, especially because you had to contact them to get a response.
While I’m not positive, I believe the OP is from Illinois…and the kid DID apply to her state flagship, University of Illinois Urbana Campus (UIUC). She did not, however, apply to any of the other less expensive public universities in Illinois.
UIUC would only have been a “back up” if the school was affordable for this family.
I am baffled, however, that she didn’t get accepted there. I’m wondering if she applied late, didn’t have a complete application or something else happened to prevent her acceptance.
@thumper1, UIUC admits by major. CS is very competitive and would be a low reach (because she’s a she; for a boy with her stats and achievements, it would be a high reach). Engineering would be a match (50% odds). Other STEM and business would still not be guaranteed. It’s shocking if she was rejected for a non-STEM/non-business major (unless she gave off the vibe in her essay that UIUC was beneath her and she wouldn’t attend if accepted), but if they had to call to find out the result, either she doesn’t know how to check online or something was wrong with the application.
I currently work in an admissions office and I guarantee you these schools knew all about the school and nothing hampered her. Something else must have been a red flag.
It’s not a matter of the number of colleges applied too, it’s a matter of the range like others are saying. 4 colleges is fine, as long as at least one is a affordable, guaranteed admission safety school. Even that kid who applied and was accepted to all 8 Ivies and MIT had a safety - UAlabama - which was good because in the end that was where he knew he would be accepted and financially he could afford to go.
I think the OP is real person and hasn’t logged back in to reply because they’ve seen almost universal disagreement with their positions and isn’t inclined to hop back in right away. I mean, a person who says their daughter may as well have quit school and done drugs vs. going to a boarding school and ended up the same way isn’t thinking rationally.
I only have boarding school experience from a summer program back in the dark ages, but even then, everyone knocked themselves out to explain college options to us. Either this girl paid no attention at all to what she was told and the parents stayed so uninvolved that they had no idea about how funding and admissions worked or some combination. I don’t believe that the prep school would have been so completely lax here. I wouldn’t have stayed in business for more than 100 years if it was.
My own kids both pre and post discovery of CC were told before ever looking at colleges to pick a true safety first-everything else is gravy once admissions happen. It’s not a safety if you can’t afford it or you wouldn’t want to attend.
Why don’t those who think they know what the school is just post the name?
I’ve searched for boarding schools affiliated with junior colleges and vice versa using a variety of terms and haven’t come back with an obvious candidate.
Whatever the school is (which I think I found by googling) it is obvious that the college guidance is non existent. I wonder if the aim of the school is to get the high school students to stay a few more years and get their AA from them instead of leaving after 12th grade.
I think these are parents who didn’t have their hand on the “college pulse” and likely assumed that:
things haven’t changed much since “their day”.
the boarding school saw her list and were ok with it.
didn’t ask enough questions to find out if maybe DD was told to apply to a safety and she ignored the advice.
This sort of thing probably happens more than we think. I know that my nephews’ “all boys prep day school” and my “all girls” sister school require that all students apply to a sure affordable safety. Likely, that policy was implemented after a few kids had either no acceptances or only unaffordable ones.
Which parents who do have their hands on the college pulse" would only know second-hand what their child’s SAT score was, and not even a specific number but just that it is acceptable?
I’ll just add that if the OP’s daughter did apply to UIUC then I know for a fact that they almost “over-communicate”. I just checked my son’s ‘college folder’ in our email account.
He received the following emails (application confirmation, application payment receipt, a few days later an application status update…which tells the applicant to follow certain steps and if there are questions, it provides an email link and phone number. This is a quote from the email “Don’t forget to check your status regularly to make sure we’ve received all of your supporting items.” then there were numerous (and frankly annoying) “Countdown to Decisions” emails.)
In regards to UIUC (if that was the U of I branch the OP was referring to) I doubt the ‘problem’ came from their end.
That said, it is important the OP learns from the mistakes that were made and moves on for the sake of the daughter. She sounds like a bright girl who needed more guidance. All is not lost. Take it as a lesson in resilience. She can be stronger and better for the experience. In fact my daughter said she could use it in future interviews. In a couple of years she can craft a nice story of how she overcame the disappointment.
Illinois was the safety. How wrong we were. We weren’t expecting free, but we were still quite shocked at the exorbitant costs at the U of Denver. We’d been paying 5k a year for her high school, which we realized was quite a bargain.
She would be thrilled with a decent state school that wasn’t in the middle of nowhere. She likes city life. I thought UNM might fit the bill, it is in a decent sized city, but on the edge of nowhere admittedly.
Really? Where are these schools? Can you name some? Maybe I can get her to apply there when she’s ready. She would be an engineering, science STEM major for sure. I don’t know exactly what she would pick for sure, but I she’s never even considered a non-STEM major.