<p>ScottZ ... did you become a JAG Officer?</p>
<p>There is strong, and then there is army strong. As long as you live in the US, which I assume you do, and enjoy the liberties that the US provides you, you can't deny your daughter the ability to join the army. That would be hypocritical. </p>
<p>Furthermore, the military gives a myriad of benefits to those who join it: career experience, money for college, and, most of all, the strength to succeed. You should really consider the military more.</p>
<p>You made her strong; they'll make her army strong.</p>
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ScottZ ... did you become a JAG Officer?
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<p>I start the dual JD/MBA program this fall. Everything is still on the table so who knows, I could still go that route :)</p>
<p>YouTube</a> - Army Strong</p>
<p>I promise you that very few 17 year olds know what they are talking about when they say they want to serve. My elder cousin/role model dropped out if westpoint when they tear gassed the freshman without masks. He's still very patriotic and brave, but he has learned that there are different ways in which one can serve the country. There's no higher honor than raising a family and that's what he did after attending cornell. She
wants the romance of war? Tell her to read Born on the Fourth of July and think about it. I don't think there's anything wrong with serving, just serving at the age of 18. We both know that she has not fully matured... Don't let her do it. Stall her for sometime until she matures.</p>
<p>How to stop her? I think its a good idea to have someone talk to her who has a solid sense of realism. She seems to be suckered in by the JROTC recruiters sales pitch... And doesnt respect your opinion on the issue because you haven't 'been there'. Find someone who knows what being a marine is like to talk to her. She needs to understand that there are no Black Hawk
Downesque missions... Just get her to
stop and wait at least until she is 21 or so... </p>
<p>Stop her. I promise you that she may hate you for it, but in twenty years, she will thank your for it.</p>
<p>Sounds like the 17 year old did not do her research about the military. Every branch has you take off your masks during gas training. You don't want your first time exposed to gas to be in the field. </p>
<p>Good decision for her to leave if she could not cut it.</p>
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My elder cousin/role model dropped out if (sic) westpoint when they tear gassed the freshman without masks.
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<p>yep - the do this. Problem is you make it sound like it's a bad thing. Iron Maiden is correct - if she didn't know it was coming she wasn't paying attention throughout the application process. It is before the freshman year however. Some kids just don't get through Cadet Basic Trainng. This doesn't make your cousin a bad person, nor does it make the Army bad.</p>
<p>I wasnt saying the army is bad, I was saying very few 17 year olds know what it is. If the op's D knows what she is talking about, fine, but from the OPs post, talking about growing up in a one perspective military town, no father figure, being sold by JROTC... I would guess that the daughter doesnt really know what she is signing up for. "She thinks she will get her choice of assignments,".... Good luck with that.</p>
<p>And I have no problem with the army as a whole.</p>
<p>One quick suggestion about getting her to think about college. In my sophomore summer I took a really interesting seminar at Carleton about war literature. It was really great to discuss all the facets of war with a slew of people, ranging from your "its the highest honor to serve" to your "they just want disposable bodies" types of people. We read tons of books and movies focused on being realistic and depicting the sides of war that people like us (teenagers) would never have guessed existed, unless we had a family member who talked about his time in a war. Im not a fan of English, but I learned so much from that class. </p>
<p>Try finding her somthing similar. She may agree to a class that is about military/war, since that is her area of interest? She will get a taste of college life and maybe decide she likes it. And she'll get some other perspectives from all types of people. I think a college summer program would be good for her and the one type of program that you could pull off (in addition to one of those army-indoctrinating camps that she seems to want to go to) is a program where you study the experiences and knowledge of others who have been marines, bombers, officers, etc etc.</p>
<p>Right now she's not an adult yet and you can still make a few decisions for her. Don't feel as if your the bad guy for making your daughter do something that you think will be beneficial - that's what every mother does. You've got a little time left to try and make her the best person possible... So do something. And parents make their kids do things like summer programs all the time. I think it will be good for her to realize that college before the military might be a very good idea... So have any1 you can talk to her and try to get her to do something that is related to the military, but not in the manner in which she is used to.</p>
<p>To the original poster:
Let's leave the military issue aside for a moment. Whenever I hear a young person suddenly change plans, I wonder what may be behind it. Some of the things you told us about your daughter made me wonder if what she is really expressing is not a desire to join the military, but a desire to escape tension or unhappiness in other areas of her life. </p>
<p>Are things going well for her at school socially? Is she feeling burnt out keeping up her excellent grades? Has there been, perhaps, a sudden change in your family situation that might be causing her tension and a desire to escape? Has she recently had a disappointment in love or friendship? Has there been a change in other areas of your relationship with your daughter recently? It could even be that she is anxious about applying to college and being rejected (not uncommon these days). </p>
<p>I have absolutely nothing against the military (indeed, I am married to a retired military officer), but I suspect the issue here may not be "I want to enlist!" but that, rather, "I want to escape." Perhaps something else that is going on in your daughter's life that she doesn't know how to express to you or deal with on her own. I would encourage you to give this some thought, ask questions about what else is happening in her life, in particular why she has suddenly become so turned off to school, and listen very carefully to what may be going on here between the lines. Your hunch that counseling may be helpful, not to disuade her from the military, but to find out what is going on, is probably on target. The truth is that 15 is a very hard age for many kids -- they're struggling to figure out their "adult" identity, and trying on different ways of being independent. </p>
<p>So, separate out your feelings about the military, and see if there might be some other issues below the surface that she needs help with. </p>
<p>Best of luck to you and your daughter!</p>