I truly think he will be OK. when something like this happens, it causes panic/shame/worry etc. (I have observed something similar in a couple cases; the students and parents turned out better and stronger!)
In a couple months, he will resume his studies with wisdom and the lesson learned. Do make him work if possible (even a regular job like Starbucks or landscaping, etc); don’t let him sit around the house depressed or relaxing 24x7.
Not the end of the world. His transcript is not going to follow him for life! I’ve never had anyone ask me for one (only proof of my degree), and I work in higher ed.
He hasn’t been dismissed, so he can still finish. Colleges take cheating seriously, so he just has to be aware to be honest with his work in the future.
I agree that employers may not ask for transcript, so he should take advantage of the opportunity to return. Now is a great time to start applying for seasonal retail jobs at places like Target, Walmart, Kohl’s, etc.
This is not the end of his education and it’s not the end of his life.
He needs to come home and get a job. Any job that requires him to wake up, put on shoes, and get out of the house. Once he’s cleared to return to college, he will do that, and then will finish and graduate and get on with his life.
I know you are upset and scared. But if you catastrophize this by thinking it’s the end of the world- he will adopt your behavior and that’s not productive. They are letting him return under their conditions- it’s their college- so the faster he starts working the program, the sooner he can get back to it.
@sunnyschool the examples you know where they suspensions from college, are they OK now, with jobs etc. It still very new, so we are all very scared and in a panic mode
@blossom agree, its just that its still new and we keep thinking about it. and he is been always one of those really good kids, doing lot of voluntary work ,even in holidays, not for resume, he just enjoys doing it, very thoughtful , friendly and hard working. We are just trying to process all of this
Stop processing for now.
Get practical. He needs to get cracking. Once he’s got a job, you can all process as much as you need to. He’s been given a second chance which is great- he needs to find something productive to do during his “Gap time” so that he doesn’t flounder once he’s home.
@blossom agree, about getting on.
I sent you PM @jingle123
The next semester starts in January, correct? So he takes a seasonal job and starts college again in three months having learned a valuable lesson.
Cheer up! You’ve got this. It isn’t forever.
@Groundwork2022 thank you, right now all the advise you all have been giving is very good. was looking for some examples of people who have been through this. To learn from them on the best path to take, one member gave me some useful info
@jingle123 YES they are fine!
Agree with the “Get Practical” advice.
Don’t dwell on this. Just help him get a job, move forward, learn the lesson, then go back and finish the degree.
@sunnyschool thank you
@Mwfan1921 thank you