Do you have to go to the graduation?

<p>i think graduation ceremonies are overrated… the only time i cared about them was in preschool. in high school, i went to graduation without cap and gown (social convention? **** that no one really cares) just to get my diploma thing that doesn’t even matter</p>

<p>I never went to my undergrad graduation and have never regretted it. I did go for my masters it was ok but long and dull. The reward for me was internal, knowing what I had learned and accomplished outweighed any ceremony .</p>

<p>Don’t listen to some of these people (i.e. PrincessMahina). It’s sad that we still live in a country where peoples choices can’t be respected and are looked at as “stooopid” if it doesn’t agree with the norm. </p>

<p>OP. Do what you want. It doesn’t make you any less or any more of a person by not showing up. If you don’t want to go, don’t go. If you really don’t want to go, don’t. Don’t let people here stop you from doing what you want.</p>

<p>Oops, I guess I’m going to get attacked next since my response doesn’t agree with the “norm” response in this thread.</p>

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<p>Because we have that much power over the OP… :rolleyes:</p>

<p>Well the whole ganging up on him and “you’sz dum fo not gone graduat1on!” may make the OP feel like he’s in the wrong. He’s not any more wrong in feeling the way he does about graduation than you guys are “right” for feeling the way you do about graduation.</p>

<p>^ We just gave opinions. It’s the OP’s choice.</p>

<p>I didn’t go to my college graduation ceremony because I felt at the time that it was unnecessary pomp and circumstance. My family were coming to town about a month later for my wedding and so they didnt come out for graduation weekend. So I didn’t have anyone else pressuring me to be a part of it</p>

<p>I still regret not going. The ceremony provides a tangible marker between college and the nextstep in your life. I walked out of my last exam and wasnt starting my career for another few weeks and I can’t describe how depressing it was to go from being a part of a community one minute to being out in the cold the next. </p>

<p>I found my student email was cutoff (changed to an alumni email address), was denied access to the library computer lab, turned away at the gym and lost my badge access at the lab I worked on campus. All the while, my friends had their beaming parents doting upon them and taking them to fancy meals to celebrate. I felt all alone and like I had made a terrible error. </p>

<p>My thoughts are that it may be a corny self congratulatory exercise, but you don’t get these kind of opportunities often and you should take advantage of it</p>

<p>What if the dean calls your name to give you the diploma during celebration and you don’t go there? What happens?</p>

<p>zchryevns:
So you speak for the majority? Under what power were you granted such authority? Or do you have solid statistical evidence to support that many do choose to celebrate in a group setting rather than a private by choice and not because of social norms?</p>

<p>I really don’t understand why you’re pushing this so much. I’m not saying either way is right, just that people have the right to choose what is right for them and that those ways might differ from what the social norm is. I will also add it is none of your business what my family thinks, but I will make it very clear that their thoughts and feelings on the issue do not matter as I have never mattered to them. I have long since “paid my dues” to the only person who took the time to raise me in a far greater amount than one day could ever amount to.</p>

<p>But, as I said, I may go if just for the chance to annoy friends and family that my university will have multiple ceremonies for me to attend. Or maybe I’ll go climb Half Dome instead. My idea of celebration is not the same as everyone else: I either want to torture loved ones or torture myself ;)</p>

<p>I will be walking 3-4 months after I actually graduate. If I do decide to go, I will have to go out of my way to make time to return as I will hopefully be working full time by then. Thankfully, I already have significant work experience from between when I graduated high school years ago up to when I transferred to my 4-year that I have an edge on top of my degree.</p>

<p>Stratusfaction:
Yeah! How dare people like us say it’s okay to do what makes one the most comfortable! Grr! Arg!</p>

<p>belevitt:
I am sorry to hear you regret your decision. It is definitely something one should always consider: is there any doubt? Why are you skipping it? Is there going to be any celebration? All of my friends who have played hooky from graduation all had some other type of celebration happening. One took a trip to Oregon just to name an example. She does not regret her decision. None of my friends do that had some other celebration.</p>

<p>It truly is awful you regret missing yours :(. Not everyone does, but it is terrible when it happens.</p>

<p>yg7s7:
Some colleges require you to register for the ceremony. If you haven’t registered, then you’re not in danger of your name being called without you being there ;). But it can and will vary college by college depending on how they run things.</p>

<p>Honestly, I would go to my college graduation and any other future ones I may have or may attend. If I’m going to put in 4-5 years, I would at least want to be recognized for it.</p>

<p>But honestly I can understand why people don’t want to go. At my HS graduation in 2007, it was held at Cameron Indoor Stadium at duke. there were 6 schools including mine that used that. 3 one day, and the next half the day after. I believe on the friday I graduated, My school was the first one to go. I remember paying at least 60 dollars for my cap & gown, of which I still have. the week before, we had to go the stadium to “practice” for the actual thing. </p>

<p>First I had to sit through our band playing pomp and circumstance, then the principal said a few words, then the valedictorian, then maybe a teacher or 2, and then they started to call names. In a class that had at least 200 people, unless your last name started with a/b/c so on and so on you had a few minutes until your name was called. Not to mention the obvious students who were favorites from listening to the applause…</p>

<p>I’m not being negative and judgemental, i just don’t understand why someone would want to skip a milestone occasion like graduation. In my opinion, it IS stupid to skip something that monumental.</p>

<p>I’m getting my MS this summer. I don’t expect to attend because of work. UVa will mail the degree to me. No big deal</p>

<p>It’s the third time I will graduate in ~3 years.
HS-June 2008
College-May 2010
Grad School- Aug 2011</p>

<p>Your statement earlier in the thread tells a different story, PRiNCESSMAHiNA, where you clearly attacked the person rather than just the act:

You’re right. Calling someone who believes differently than you an idiot is not being negative and judgmental. Next joke please :P</p>

<p>To me, the milestone is the graduation itself, not the ceremony. For you, the milestone includes the ceremony. Your belief is right for you while mine is right for me. Some share in your beliefs, some share in mine, while others have their own ideas separate from our own. Please do not make such rude comments about the intelligence of others. No one is stopping you from parading your accomplishments with the others who wish to do so nor is anyone questioning your intelligence for wanting to attend.</p>

<p>Think of it this way: the fewer people who go to a graduation ceremony, the less time you have to sit there waiting as names are called ;)</p>

<p>In my opinion Graduation is PRETTY big. If you didn’t want to attend it in the first place why didn’t you just save some money and time and get an online degree or something? You put four years of time and effort into something(not to mention money) and at the very end you just say “Yeah I put all this effort into this but I don’t want to go to Graduation.” That is like running a huge marathon and then right before the finish line you stop because you don’t want to be recognized for finishing. Its a big day, just go and enjoy it.
Also the way I see it some of you are attacking PRiNCESSMAHiNA for having different ideas then you and saying exactly what she thinks…which is pretty much exactly the purpose of this forum. Honestly I agree with her that it would be a stupid decision to skip out on Graduation. Who knows, if you do you might look back and regret not going…so just suck it up and do it.</p>

<p>

Incorrect analogy. If it worked this way, it would be like getting up to having those last few credits needed to graduate and then not completing them. That would make your analogy work. However, even if one does not go to the ceremony, one still graduates. One still “crosses the finish line.”</p>

<p>A better one would be: It’s like participating in the marathon and then not partaking of the koolaid they offer you as a bonus when you finish ;)</p>

<p>No one is attacking PRiNCESSMAHiNA. She very specifically called those who think differently than her a negative and highly judgmental term. While she and you are both entitled to think that the act is stupid, neither of you have the right to make derogatory marks towards other users. That is rude and uncalled for. All I am asking is for respect and consideration for others to be shown.</p>

<p>What does it hurt you if some choose not to go? What business is it of yours? How does your opinion warrant you to condone calling others idiots for not believing what you believe?</p>

<p>Get over it. Some people do not want to play a part in a dog and pony show. It is none of your business. There are huge benefits for you, the person who wants to get all gussied up, if fewer people go.</p>

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<p>Exactly. I don’t see how the OP not wanting to go the ceremony is going to affect the people here. They just want to make themselves believe that their way of thinking is right and any other way of thinking is wrong.</p>

<p>I hate to quote myself but as I said in my first sentence it is my OPINION. I have mine and you have you’s. I never said your opinion was wrong. I am not a social person and getting up in front of crowds irks me but I am walking anyways to say I did it. So I guess we just agree to disagree.</p>

<p>There is a difference between attacking someone for their opinion (calling them and anyone who believes what they believe an idiot) and stating your opinion. You agreed with and supported someone who was attacking and not just stating her opinion.</p>

<p>It is a violation of forum rules to attack other user with insults. So please, state your opinion, but do so in a way that does not attack other users. This is not something that can be disagreed on, but is something that can be reported ;). You are missing the point that this is the issue, not your opinion.</p>

<p>Some people will have finals later on Friday and then graduation ceremonies are generally on Saturday or Sunday, which is not enough time for all final grades to be in. Almost assuredly what people receive is a blank piece of paper and the actual diploma is mailed later. This should have been explained in correspondence from the university when you applied for graduation.</p>

<p>As far as participating in the ceremony, I’ve never heard when it was mandatory. Many people do go, and if you’re uncertain, then generally it’s probably better to go than not.</p>

<p>However, everyone is different, and people have different reasons for not wanting to attend. You should not be harassed or bullied into attending if you really do not want to go.</p>

<p>What some people in this thread fail to realize is that just because a ceremony is important to them, it may not be to others. And, there may be other reasons, as well. Failure to understand that others have reasons that may not be apparent is simply a lack of maturity.</p>

<p>(One example might be a limited number of tickets and step parents who do not get along, so to avoid a fight, the graduate chooses not to attend. Another example might be a fear of walking across the stage. There are countless reasons, and no one should be made to feel bad just because others here might not feel the same way.)</p>

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I am saying that attending graduation is the norm, yes (i.e. >50% of graduates attend graduation). I don’t have statistics to support that (I did search), but would you really argue with that?</p>

<p>There’s no need to be defensive. As I said, I was not implying that you should attend graduation, but merely asking how your parents feel about your decision in order to gain some sort of insight. It was just out of curiosity, so relax.</p>