<p>I have a question for those of you who are having problems with roommates, academics, settling into the social life at your school, etc. Do your parents have any idea that you are having a less than rosy college experience? On the parents' forum, it seems like parents are only hearing positives from their kids. It is very different from this forum. Is that because those of you who are less than happy have painted an unrealsitic happy picture for your parents? Of is it some selection thing where students who are happy with their college experiences are unlikely to post in the student forum, but their parents are likely to post on the parents' forum?</p>
<p>I think parents know is some cases but are not likely to do anything about it. They expect the doing to come from the student who then posts here.</p>
<p>My parents are putting themselves in the red to send me here. I can't tell them I don't like it.</p>
<p>Why not? If you cut and run maybe they won't be in the red anymore. I should think if they are in the red to send you that you owe it to them to make things clear.......you need to find another place. That doesn't cost anymore why would you sit on unhappiness that is costing so much?</p>
<p>I'm extremely careful about telling my mom when I'm sick/stressed out, because she's 750 miles away and she worries too much.</p>
<p>You mean the prototypical Jewish mother? I hear 'ya.</p>
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Do your parents have any idea that you are having a less than rosy college experience?
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<p>No, and I think they would leave it up to me to fix whatever issues I have with my college experience. Isn't that why they send them off to college? To have them learn a lot about life themselves? Throw them in the jungle and hope for the best so to speak?</p>
<p>I keep my parents up to today on what is going on in my life, however I also stress that they play a minimal role in it, since I like to deal with things myself.</p>
<p>I wasn't thinking that your parents would "do" anything particularly. Just wondered if they even knew. There are a lot of parents getting nothing but "everything is great" from their kids, and after reading this forum I'm wondering if that's really the case.</p>
<p>when i went home for thanksgiving, i got up and told my parents that i drink frequently............ i expected to hear criticism from my CHINESE mother and my caucasian step father who didnt drink much in college. however, they seemed to be OK about it. i told my mom UVA's "motto" is WORK HARD, PARTY HARDER. surprisingly, at the thanksgiving dinner, my mom told my relatives that "kids should work hard and party harder in colleges".</p>
<p>to the OP: this thread really does have some value. i thank you for bringing this up. because i do believe that a lot of parents really don't have any clue.</p>
<p>Very true. I rarely tell my parents anything bad - especially concerning grades since they would probably get angry. But then again, I never really used to talk to my parents often anyway even when I was at home (I only call them once a week in college).</p>
<p>i tell my parents everything about my academics and friends (mainly because i have a gpa dependent scholarship to maintain and i wouldnt want them to be shocked one day to find out that i had lost it) But i dont let them onto the fact that i drink and party alot. they know that i go to parties, but not the type of parties that i go to, and the fact that i've been drunk maybe 10 out of the 14 weekends i've been here. i think they would be very angry, scared and disappointed to hear this. they definitely know the kinds of things that happen on college campuses, but they dont know how much of this stereyotypical college stuff i'm involved in. i talk to my mom like once or twice a week, but its been alot more recently since ive been having problems with my schedule, an annoying roomate, as well as a mouse problem in my room that i had to b^i^t^c^h to her about.</p>
<p>I've been having a hard time making good friends here, and I've been lonely a lot. I told my parents that and they know I'm not as happy as I was at the beginning of the year. I don't really drink or party so that's not an issue w/ them.</p>
<p>My parents know. Then again, I do still live with them, but it wouldn't be any different if I were in a dorm. I'd still tell them point blank what was going on, because that's just the kind of relationship I have with them.</p>
<p>I'm with #14...</p>
<p>My mom usually finds out the problems after the fact. When I'm sick she generally doesn't find out, unless she can hear it. Sometimes it's really obvious that I'm sick. Other times I can hide it. She's only 40 minutes away but she still worries too much. I had a cold and she was asking if I needed her to come up and bring me anything. Most of the roommate problems she also finds out about after it's been resolved. Again, I don't want her worrying. I'm not having a bad experience here; I'm really very happy here. But like with anything there have been ups and downs. The latest roommate problem is the first problem that she's heard anything about, and only because I had to explain why the dust in my room had gone from only bothering my allergies a little to making me unable to breathe (we'd rearranged the room). Also had to tell her that one of my roommates may be moving out. I'm in a built up lounge, and it's possible that if she moves out we may be broken down. It now looks like even if she does move out we won't be broken down, but it was a concern that could hit her in the wallet (I get a discounted rate because of my room, and if it gets broken down I'll get hit with the difference).</p>
<p>At the beginning of the semester I tried to act like everything was ok, even though things were rough, I just kept working at it and trying to make it better, since she is 2000 miles away, I didnt want to make her worry (were exceptionally close--al la Gilmore Girls) but after a while, when things werent getting any better and I didnt have anyone to really talk to about it, I turned to mom and talked everything out with her which helped immensely. To some people it may seem weird how much I talk to my mom, but then again it depends on the relationship prior to leaving for college, were friends before mother-daughter, so that helped. As far as finances go, Im putting myself through and taking on all the loans, so thats an issue.</p>
<p>I live close to home, and my mom has unexpectedly showed up while I'm experiencing a nauseating hangover... so there's some things I haven't had to TELL her, so to speak. </p>
<p>I let my parents know that I'm not doing so hot academically so that it's not a huge surprise if I lose my GPA-based scholarship this year. but a lot of my issues are with the social side of things (friends and hookups), which I don't go into ever.</p>
<p>I use to hate talking to my mom when I was in HS but now that I'm 3 hours away I feel a need to talk to her. My mom pretty much knows about everything, when my roommate and I are having problems, my mom is the one to hear every last detail, when I get pulled over, even if she'd never even know, I call and tell her, I call her when I'm upset and wanna transfer schools. If I couldn't talk to my mom about it, I'm not sure what I would do. We argue just as much as we always have, but being able to tell her my problems helps. Even when that means confessing that I got a C on my last exam, or telling her about the guy I met. Talking to her can sometimes be easier than talking to friends. I feel that my parents have a right to know what's going on in my life. Better to let them know, then make them worry.</p>