I’m currently a sophomore business major at Notre Dame, and while everyone else at my school loves it I don’t really enjoy it. Not to say I absolutely hate it, but the vast majority of the time I feel empty and somewhat depressed. My school doesn’t have a greek system, so most friend groups are from the dorm. But a year has passed and most guys have settled into their groups, and Im left alone without close friends. When I go out to a party I always feel like I’m just tagging along, and this year I don’t even feel like going out anymore. Also while I like sports, I don’t get the huge emphasis on sports esp. football, and I haven’t grown up a fan of the team like a lot of kids here did.
I’m definitely going to put in transfer applications to Columbia and the University of Chicago, but I realize transfer applications for them are pretty competitive, and I’m debating whether to apply to some other schools as well. (I was rejected from Columbia and waitlisted at Chicago when I applied in HS) These two colleges also have top notch economics/finance programs, and networking would be easy as they are situated in the city.
I also feel like I would fit in better in a city culture, where socializing isn’t just confined to house parties and darties. I’m also a minority and not religious, so a city would be a lot more diverse and a better fit compared to my school which is mostly white, Catholic, wealthy, etc. It’s just that I don’t want to end up transferring to a worse academic school than the one I’m at now, since my school has a good alumni network and I could definitely land some good gigs in finance upon graduation. I would really appreciate it if you drop some thoughts or advice below, or share similar experiences you had. Thanks.
Others may disagree with me but honestly, I don’t think you should transfer. After this year you are half way done with your college experience. The last two years will fly by and you will have a degree from an outstanding institution. Stay. It will be worth it.
You just might be the type of personality that doesn’t love college, the college experience, or college life. I grew up in a family of four children. Our parents made sure all of us got to college. Two of us loved the experience and they were among the best years of our life. Two of us did not. I don’t think it had anything to do with the type of schools we went to, but rather the personalities that went to college.
I was recently talking to a gentleman I have great respect for in all areas. He is a 1%er based on his own hard work. He is about 60 years old and his first job paid 12K a year. He worked his way up the ladder and still works very hard. He only has an undergraduate degree from a solid liberal arts college in PA. Recently he told me those were the four most miserable, torturous years of his life. He just didn’t like college. I knew him back then too and had no idea. He was involved and seemed happy. But, my point is, he got through it and look at him today. Because you are so far into your experience today, I think you need to stick it out, force yourself to be positive and make the most of it.
I truly believe today’s undergrads should plan on graduate school. My advice is to pick a graduate school that would be in a city that might be more of a fit. You might be one of those people who feels more connected while in grad school and loves it more than undergrad. Planning grad school and realizing that your time at ND is limited, might be a strategy to pass the time. If you don’t plan to go to grad school then plan where you will live after college. This time in your life really does go fast!
In the meantime be that person whose glass is half full rather than half empty. Every time you find yourself thinking of a complaint about where you are, think of two positives. Make up your mind to do this and make the best of it.
Have you sought counselling for your depression? Many college students feel this way and blame the school. you may find yourself depressed at a new school too.
Have to agree you might not love the “college experience” which is really just what? If you aren’t into parties, don’t drink or get drunk, aren’t in a relationship or are in one, really just want to graduate and move on this may be as good as it gets.
My oldest daughter’s friends was like that she wasn’t a partier, didn’t do typical college crazy things, just had dreams of a good grad school, and wanted to be away.
If you ask her now she says “It was okay and she went to a good party school.”
Thanks for the replies. I do business clubs and stay in shape with sports, but it’s just that I feel disconnected from most people here, since a lot of them have similar personalities and interests. It’s not that I don’t drink it’s just so many people go too hard at it. I don’t know, but in my heart I think I made the wrong choice in picking a college. sigh
You can try to change if you want. Go ahead and do a little research. The big variable is often financial aid since many schools are not as generous with transfers. As with your first search, make sure you have a financial safety school. Getting your information in order to apply to transfer is not the same as accepting an offer of admission. Take your time to research carefully so that if you go, you land at a school you will definitely like better.
I actually think you should look into transferring. You have given the school a year which should be enough time to know if you fit or not. You go to very respected school. Perhaps apply to a school that isn’t as selective as the two you listed. Does Wash U have a business major? That could be a good fit for you. Do a little research into some other schools and find out what kind of FA you might get. Meanwhile, I agree that you should go to the counseling center, because you have plenty of time before any transferring happens and you shouldn’t wait. Good luck.
@unhypeman Transferring can also be hard because people have already sorted out friend groups and you’d come in as a junior. Can you look at study abroad for a year or semester to break things up? College isn’t this fantasy experience but you shouldn’t be depressed either. What about joining a club that is more social than business club? Balloon dancing?