Many, many years ago I was contacted to see if I would be able to work with an elementary school principal who apparently had been molesting several of his students. I was not told who it was or what county they worked in. I was asked if I could see him and not report it. When I said no, I didn’t hear another word about it. I still worry about those kids.
^^^Jeez.
I respectfully disagree with you. I think the girls (any girls) should get to decide what to make public, when and how. I think it’s terrible for them that this has been made public against their wishes. And, yes, I do have my own experience. I think it’s great how you handle your situation, but I do think that outing something private is a form of victimization.
They are not now becoming victims (and most prefer to use the term survivors), they are becoming re-victimized, by having a traumatic experience that is not in their control. But, whose decision was it for these girls to go before the cameras? If it was their parents, I will just simply shake my head . That would be a terrible decision.
Excellent point. Thank you for clarifying.
I just don’t get the whole reality show thing, but fact is I’m not interesting. One of my husband’s co-workers is doing a reality show and it just baffles me.
Abuse survivors have nothing to be ashamed of, or should have nothing to be ashamed of, but especially if they haven’t gotten any kind of help all kinds of feelings are often left. Rationally, it is is pretty easy, they were abused, it wasn’t their fault…but many have guilt and shame around it. When kids were abused by priests, for example, and told their parents, often the parents turned on the kid, told them they were lying, and some blamed the kid for what happened by accounts that have been published (obviously, not all parents or many did this, but still). Other parents because it involves sex themselves add to the guilt (not meaning to), when they tell the child they cannot talk about it, make it seem like it is shameful, and the kid puts it together emotionally like they had something to be ashamed of. Sometimes kids, especially ones into puberty, when their body reacts to what happens, and figure since their body reacted, it in some way was their fault…there are many complex feelings around it. Even when someone has had help, they are often reluctant to talk about it, while I can appreciate and applaud those who are open about it, a lot cannot talk about it with others, for the reasons mentioned. If the girls never got help, besides probably being told it was their duty to forgive their brother and that Jesus would take care of all, it is likely they are dealing with a lot of emotions, including shame and guilt, and I suspect they are being hurt again by all this.
^There are things from my past that I can’t talk about, so I can see how having it splashed across the universe would be very difficult. I wonder if the parents put the sisters up to this in some way.
Harvest moon says what I have been thinking (and may have posted here once): What would they have done if an outsider had done this to their daughters? Would they be as forgiving? Would they shield their daughters the next time that boy was in the house?
I am certain the parents put the daughters up to doing the interview. I think it’s a way to generate sympathy for the family so the reality show can continue. A whole lotta people are getting a whole lotta money from that show.
It will be interesting to see how this goes tonight. I questioned at first whether I will watch. I probably will at least DVR.
For those of you who don’t know/watch the show, I’ll give you MY take on the two girls who are being interviewed tonight. IMO, while they are sisters, they have much different personalities
As mentioned earlier, both girls met, courted, married and became pregnant by their husband pretty much within a year. Jill, 24, married first, Jessa, 22, second. These are the first Duggar girls to marry.
Jill: Jill has some training as a midwife. Not sure how “certified” that training is. She delivered Anna’s babies (Anna is Josh’s wife). I would describe Jill as very simple, quiet, kind of a flat personality. She to me, seems much younger than 24. She seems she would be VERY obedient. She got married June 2014 and gave birth April 2015.
Jessa: I don’t remember hearing about Jessa’s skills or interests (many of the kids have an “interest” - like midwifery, music, volunteer fireman, etc.). Jessa is more matter of fact and feisty. No nonsense. She strikes me as a organized for home tasks (she was the one always in charge of recording the kids homeschool grades/work and I believe she was in charge of packing for all 21 family members on trips - poor girl!!! 
). However, she doesn’t seem to be super bright to me. She can be very VOCAL. She is known for putting some controversial statements on her Instagram, etc. She married Nov. 1, 2014 and is expecting her first baby, on the same date, Nov. 1 , 2015.
In the clip on Wednesday, it is Jill that we see sobbing. I would expect that she would be more crumbly with emotions (which I understand) and that Jessa would be more direct and hold it together. We will see!
I’ve never watched the show, so for those who have: What was Jill’s training like? I have friends who have trained to be midwives, and their training involved a lot of time, and lots of sleepless nights with laboring women. Is that what Jill had?
http://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/19-kids-and-counting/michelle-duggars-blog/jill-jana-duggar-midwifery/
This is from their blog in 2013: (link above for complete info)
"Back a few years ago, I had the opportunity to attend 12 weeks of childbirth classes with my 14-year-old friend, who was a single mom. Through these classes, I learned how to coach her during the birth of her child. Although I had attended two of my siblings’ births, being able to work as an active part of my friend’s birth made me interested in learning more. I became friends with a doula/labor coach who worked in the area, and started going to home and hospital births with her. Soon, I became her assistant, and through that, I came into contact with other local midwives. Over the course of the next several years, these midwives would call on me periodically for help at home births.
I had been considering attending nursing school for a while, but the timing of it all wasn’t working out, and I spent a lot of time in prayer, trying to figure out where God was leading me. Eventually, through my work with the local midwives, the door opened for me to enter into a distance-learning midwifery training program in Texas. This program, after about 3 1/2 years of schooling, would give me the education I need to become a licensed, Certified Professional Midwife (CPM). My parents and I prayed and talked about this opportunity, and in May of 2012, I started midwifery school. Currently, my life consists of studying like crazy to keep up with my schooling through this distance-learning program, and at the same time, working as the senior apprentice under a local, nationally certified licensed midwife to deliver babies in an out-of-hospital setting."
^^^ Would there not be some sort of requirement for at least some college? I’m not at all familiar with the allied health professions.
But, from a family standpoint I guess it does make sense to have an in-house doula around.
To be fair, this blog post was from 2013 - I don’t know if she took a different path more recently or not. I’m thinking with the courtship etc. in 2014, she probably didn’t do anything more formal.
On the show, whenever they showed Jill attending any midwife activities, her sister Jana was with her as a doula. I never saw her attend anything on her own (that they showed on TV).
There has been no indication of whether she will be able to pursue this now that she is married.
(As an aside, the oldest sister, Jana, has to be the busiest person on that show If there was a modern remake of Cinderella, I would nominate her for the grace that she manages to juggle her duties).
A Certified Practical Midwife is a serious medical professional. If she is still getting that training, then she is undergoing a rigorous program. But perhaps once married, she is supposed to drop her career and start popping out babies.
If any of the Duggars are certified midwives they’d have to keep up with their state licensure requirements to maintain whatever certification/licensure is necessary (continuing education, etc). If they are licensed, that should be available on the web. Someone can look it up. Sorry I dont have time and really dont care, to be honest.
Yes. Because I would want a midwife who got her training in a distance program! Seriously, of all the types of medical professionals, midwifery seems to be pretty hands on.
My cousin is getting certified as a midwife. She already has a four year BSN/RN and us in grad school.
None of the girls went to college, correct? What are the state’s requirements for a “lay midwife”?
Neither sister is a licensed lay midwife or a lay midwife apprentice in the state of Arkansas (http://www.healthy.arkansas.gov/programsServices/familyHealth/WomensHealth/Pages/LayMidwifery.aspx)