We just came back last night from our daughter’s where she had her last “hard” chemo. Still more chemo until the end of the year and then radiation but they say the really hard part is over and the next phase should be easier. She doing great and all but this was not a vacation. It was good to see daughter in person and to experience exactly how things are going.
My mil calls today and the first thing she asks “did you have fun at daughter’s?”
No it was nice to see her but it wasn’t exactly fun!
We’ve been to daughter’s 3 times this summer and no it’s not fun. The trip is grueling and our daughter isn’t her best. It’s expensive and not a vacation.
@deb922 , I’ve really missed a lot on CC the past year or so. I missed the news of your daughter’s illness, I’m presuming it’s cancer. Hugs to you and wishing the most wonderful of outcomes fir you all!
Well, I hadn’t actually thought of the difference until now. I have a lot of things which I do and enjoy. My husband likes some of them, like going out to eat. But not others, like walking on the beach which I see as fun.
My husband is more “fun” than I am. This weekend we went to the farm to get apple cider donuts. They were cold. We went back the next day to get warm apple cider donuts for the XC team. That was fun.
We also have fun driving around this time of year in the convertible. The weather is beautiful and people often wave at us or we see people we know and stop to talk. It’s fun.
I have lots of hobbies and interests, most of which are in the ‘enjoyable’ category. (Tearing down a brick wall on the family tree, however is FUN, mainly because it has taken months/years to accomplish it).
H has few hobbies and hates sports. He’s never been a ‘fun-loving’ guy. When he bakes cakes for the office, he sings – that is one of the few things I can clearly delineate as ‘fun’ for him. Going to PYO farms and picking fruit also qualifies.
During Covid, we started going to local/regional parks that we had never visited. That’s now a regular thing. Have lots of new trails and ice cream/bakery joints on our list as a result.
Fun for us is traveling. We travel well together. We don’t do much socializing.
ExpatS arrived from overseas on Thursday, with his GF. He’s my sports buddy. I do the fun stuff with him, and I am thankful that he still is willing to be seen with his mom.
After the weekend people at work tend to say “did you do anything fun this weekend?!” We have all ages at work. Medical students and residents in their 20’s, staff 30 on up to mid-60’s.
But I always find myself taken back by “did you do anything FUN”. Fun? I don’t know how often I have fun…I mean I do, but “fun” doesn’t happen every weekend. Fun to me is traveling, going to a concert, a game night with our kids…maybe a special hike in a really cool place.
But I think more of my activity falls in the category of ENJOY. Things I enjoy on the weekend
I like the way you defined it… I work really really really hard during the weeks (I’m queen of working entirely too many hours) and therefore I try to have fun every weekend… and by fun I mean… I try to travel… if I can’t travel I try to make plans out of the house, with other people, because I get tired of looking at the same walls all day every day. We’re usually out and about 1-3 weekends a month traveling to various places. I just got home from a 5 day trip to new york. We usually travel 2-3 weekends a month when school is not in session and maybe 1-2 a month when school is in session. I graduate with my masters at the end of this semester.
The next 2 weekends we will be home (I have a baby shower to go to on Saturday, and the following weekend is my sisters birthday). Those weekends will probably be spent working on non enjoyable things like housework (I feel very behind on things after traveling for 2 weekends in a row while school is in session). After that I am planning a 1-2 week long trip to NC which will occupy 2 weekends.
For enjoyment… I try to squeeze in some of the smaller things you mentioned during the weeks. There’s an outdoor mall that has a gazebo that I love reading under. I also enjoy going to get a massage each week. If we are around on the weekends, i usually try to do these things then too. We also have a friend that we meet up with during the week to get yogurt or play a game.
I live for the weekends so always have fun things planned. Sometimes it’s out of the house, but other times like on rainy weekends it’s at home. I hate using up precious free time on housework so basically contract all of it out so that I can do fun things.
I often ask that question of my co-workers, although I probably say how was your weekend? Maybe adding Did you do anything fun?
A lot of time folks, even the young ones, say they just relaxed and got things done or maybe went to the beach. Not always reporting wild parties or exotic outings.
I try to plan something out of the house and with friends (or hosting) most weekends, at least one night or day. To me that is fun. But a day at the beach or a nice hike is also fun. To me, doing house or yard work is not fun and not even enjoyable. Pre-covid going to a movie would be a fun activity if we had nothing else to do!
Trying to discover more out of the way places to explore in my area.
H and I go to a comedy club for fun - we go just about every week. Most of the rest of what we do is more along the lines of things we enjoy. This thread has gotten me thinking, because we did more “fun” things pre-Covid, even when I was working a lot. His parents have needed us, requiring travel … it’s been our only travel for three years. He wanted rescue cats, and now we can only be gone a night without having to get someone to feed the cats & scoop their litter (these cats are too needy to leave more than a night). We used to find fun places for day trips, but Covid ended that & we haven’t started back up. Basically, we are pretty much forgetting to have fun experiences. I think we need to make an effort to change that.
I’m happy to hear that this conversation has triggered a thought/realization for some of you of making more time for “fun”.
I did have fun this weekend meeting D1’s probably future in-laws! Wouldn’t you know it, the one weekend I have some fun, when I came to work today, no one asked me about my weekend! LOL.
I ask my SO every single day when he gets home from work “did anything funny happen at work today?” and 99% of the time the answer is no. Then I follow it up with “did anything make you smile today?” and 75% of the time the answer is also no. We laugh on like every single meeting at work so this just blows my mind. I’ve been off the last week and go back tomorrow… I’ll probably have 20 different people ask about our trip. Lol.
I booked to see 3 shows today this week for entertainment. However today is resting for my husband, apparently got up at 4am yesterday to fly from Spain toLondon was very tiring.
But for fun I watch cat videos.
This discussion reminds me enormously of the book QUIET by Susan Cain. That book was life-changing for me in that she validated the idea that some people crave quiet contemplation and a life of the mind, but society overwhelmingly values extroverts and social events.
Those of you (like me) who are grateful that they can have an extra cup of coffee while doing the crossword in the garden on a nice day are having “fun” just as much as the person who ends up closing down the bar at 2:00 am or going to 2 concerts and a ball game on the weekend. We should not impose our ideas of “fun” on anyone else.
I live by the James Taylor lyric that “The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time”. If I am enjoying my days, not merely enduring them or getting through them, that is a gift and I consider myself lucky.
Of course we all have bad times and bad days. And we all have to clean the house or do otherwise not-fun things. But if you have more enjoyable/“fun” times than not, you are winning.
I think, perhaps, there are many “fun” things that I simply don’t find enjoyable. As a social introvert ( I have fun doing things with other people, but I don’t care if I don’t go out) I just really prefer to have a lovely level of basic enjoyment every single day. When DH and I ask each other the best thing that happened that day, it’s often the dog walk. We walk in great places, most of the time, and adore the dogs.
I love sunrise, I love sunset, I love heavy rain, I am delighted by any snow. I enjoy a great cup or tea or coffee, a wonderful book, a trashy magazine on the beach, etc. I have told my DH for years, I don’t want a mediocre life with some big flashy moments, I want low key lovely moment every day.
When I see my friends, I have one who is an uber extrovert, but my favorite time with her is one on one, so we really can connect.
I often say that I don’t love the holidays because what I really love (enjoy)is the routine of everyday life. I don’t NEED the special occasion - or I should say, I don’t need it often. Travel is an exception but we do limited travel a couple times a year.
To me there is no difference. But many things other people think of as fun, I don’t like. I do not like to travel mainly because I hate sleeping away from my bed, especially in one room hotels. Hate it. I don’t enjoy live music or shows. I find myself thinking about how soon it will be over and I can go home. I do have fun going out to dinner with others. That’s what’s fun for me.
I also have fun watching TV and reading. Having friends over for meals and taking walks with friends.
Interesting question. ShawWife and I find pleasure in many things, big and small, fun. We do the same bike ride two or three times a week through beautiful country. Hiking in the Canadian Rockies or New England. A great meal – ShawWife is a terrific cook or from some a highly rated or hole-in-the-wall restaurant. A wonderful bottle of wine. Binge-watching an engaging TV series or watching a good movie. I get great pleasure looking down the river that runs by our house or feeding the Muscovy ducks who live on the river but come up for food. I really enjoy traveling (to good places). I love the problem-solving aspect of my work and the more academic side of it (distilling generalizable principles from situation-specific insights). I love using my ideas to help people or make the world a better place. I love interesting conversation, which happens in part when we invite people over for meals or coffee.
Which of these are fun and which merely enjoyment? I’m not sure. Is the distinction that fun is adrenalin-inducing versus enjoyment not?
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