If I don't party, I am apparently uncool / a loser.

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>So, after basically expending great amounts of energy trying out for crew (I didn't pass :() and swimming, not to mention getting my PPD shot read, and losing track of what classes I was in today. But trying to catch some form of a dinner at the dining hall, the issue is ubiquitous. Even with Hurricane Hanna a couple of hours away.</p>

<p>"I don't know man," one of my acquaintances tells his friend. The angel on one shoulder tells me to do homework. But then I think, 'this is college ... and a Friday night....'"</p>

<p>"Well, if you're going to do homework, then I'm going to do homework. We have to work as a team." [because the sense of finishing work is such an unpleasant ardour to be endured for the sake of friendship, I suppose] </p>

<p>"Well, I have nothing against Chinese people, you know..." a girl from the same RC laments. (I think she meant nationality, not ethnicity.) "But on Fridays I look around my floor at 9 pm, and they're all studying!" She rolls her eyes as if in bemused reminiscence. </p>

<p>And this is before I get directly questioned about my own party habits/preferences. </p>

<p>Well, how do I explain to people that a) I don't really have any party habits 2) I actually never really partied much in high school without c) looking like an antisocial low-life?</p>

<p>I actually like social events. I especially am into LAN parties, movie-watching, sports (especially late-night soccer playing under the stars), social games, and dancing with people I know. But I'm not into drinking, crazy neuron-killing nights, (though I do however like exertion), or club dancing and hooking up.</p>

<p>So ... how do I explain this (and more importantly, go about the daunting task of finding weekend events of this sort) without looking like an antisocial loser? Or maybe I am?</p>

2

<p>Just find other people like you. Don't force yourself to be around people whose social habits are so obviously different from yours.</p>

3

<p>^ditto. Don't worry so much about what other people think, im sure you can find pletny of people who don't drink/party all the time. Theres lots of other things to do for fun.</p>

4

<p>Antisocials are not losers.</p>

5

<p>If it's not your thing then don't do it. Although I find it highly amusing that this is coming from the same person who once argued that "the human being is a social creature."</p>

6

<p>You're just ahead of the curve. The majority of students get the party phase out of the way by semester's end.</p>

7

<p>Piccolo, I think he established in his post he was social. You can't assert traditional partying is the only real form of social interaction in college.</p>

8

<p>Just say it. You really don't have to defend yourself. I don't drink/smoke/randomly hook up but I still have lots of friends who enjoy my company regardless of whether they're sober or not. I'm by nature a dork ;P, but I don't think any of them think I'm not cool because I don't drink.</p>

9

<p>Just say you don't want to go. Why do you care what they think of you?</p>

10

<p>You cannot define cool.
What if the 'cool' people are the ones actually 'uncool'. It's all in the mind. Btw I love soccer too, and I'm just like you that way. Not everyone is a party animal.</p>

11

<p>Friday and Saturday nights are really tough for me. Because all the libraries in my school will be closed after 9 PM.</p>

12

<p>I'm surprised that this concept of "cool" didn't go away in high school for you =/</p>

<p>Anyway just do your own thing. What's the use in thinking about what other people think of you?</p>

<p>You might have a hard time getting used to this mindset at first (I still am), but once you realize that there really are no consequences in being yourself around other people, even if they don't "agree" with you, I mean really..what are they gonna do about it?</p>

13

<p>I suppose I didn't want to fall into the Asian mugger template.</p>

14

<p>I respect the people who don't party more so than the party people. You aren't taking the easy way out. I'm the same way as you, and its a sign of maturity more than anything.</p>

15

<p>you would probably miss out on the opportunity of meeting new people</p>

16

<p>Being cool is about being you and being you comfortably. You obviously aren't comfortable with yourself if you have to ask for social advice on CC.</p>

17

<p>Doing homework on a friday- that makes you uncool/a loser (at least at this point in the year).</p>

<p>You don't have to party- but spending time alone, working on schoolwork which could clearly be put off till tomorrow without any detriment, that makes you antisocial.</p>

18

<p>My friends for the most part don't. I did it for the hell of it. And I must say, try it once. If you hate it, don't ever do it again. But, the stories are amazing in the morning. Even if they're about you.</p>

19

<p>I've been having this problem that whenever I'm not doing something with friends or going someplace new, I feel very loserish and have the urge to just leave and do something... I guess I'll have to work on that sometimes...</p>

<p>BTW right now I prefer hanging out to partying, which is still social, though I may prefer partying once I transfer to a school that actually has fun parties.</p>

20

<p>ASDFJ... OMG I THOUGHT YOUR ADVICE WAS AWFUL. Why would you encourage someone to party when they are perfectly content not to?</p>

<p>That being said, to the original poster I say this:It takes a lot of courage to stand by your convictions and not succumb to social pressures to fit in. </p>

<p>It also says you are a strong individual and that you can find happiness and be at peace with who you are without the use of a mind altering substance. </p>

<p>Consider yourself simply above the others as they simply haven't reached the place you are now! </p>

<p>Soon others at your level will be drawn to you so hang in there! and congratulations -I am proud of you.</p>