<p>I have known of the existance of the photos for over a month and taken no action. I just wanted confirmation that not turning them in is morally right, though i still hear that little voice in my head saying to turn them in and enhance my childs’ chances of admission. I know the odds are that only one will get in. I know because i am an alum and actively interview for the school and know the stats for prior years. I have recused myself from interviewing this season because of the obvious conflict of interest that presents. Additional comments…</p>
<p>What college?</p>
<p>Doing this will NOT increase your child’s chance of admission. Full stop. This is not a zero-sum game.</p>
<p>In fact it may decrease it, or at least it would were I the one reading your child’s file. Knowing that someone has been brought up by the sort of person who wouldn’t hesitate to interfere with a teenager’s future would definitely cloud my judgement of them.</p>
<p>Sending links to these photos to this student’s colleges is WRONG. It is so wrong and I can’t imagine living with yourself if you were to do it. It is none of your business what any other student does or doesn’t do. And yes, you would be like the Texas Cheerleader Mom to whom you refer in your first post. Your motivation is to enhance (in your estimation) your child’s chances at the same selective colleges. For one thing, I don’t think this will enhance your child’s chances as elite schools do indeed take more than one student from a high school if they want them (even if they haven’t before). You even suggested sending these photo links to schools you assume this kid applied to. I also do not believe the colleges will give your links any validity as they are sent anonymously and colleges know there are jerks out there who will send things to sabotage another kid’s chances. If you are willing to share this information because you believe a college should know it, then have the guts to attach your name. Anonymously sent links are not going to have any significance, not to mention that simply drinking or smoking pot photos are not going to mean that much as colleges know there are applicants on the pile who do those things who didn’t have a classmate’s nasty parent send in the evidence about. If you were truly moral, you would not get involved or you might do what another suggested which is to inform the parent of that student that such photos are easily accessible on the internet and they may wish to be aware of it. </p>
<p>When you engage in this kind of behavior of trying to sabotage another applicant (and colleges know people will do this and thus likely not put much stock into an anonymously sent link)…remember it can come back to bite you. For example, let’s say someone here on CC figures out who you are (it happens) and is so disgusted by your proposal that they send your school’s guidance counselor a link to your post and identity and lets them know that the parent of the val is trying to sabotage a classmate’s admissions to the same colleges to which his son/daughter applied (as well as additional colleges). </p>
<p>You say you are an alum interviewer and sat out this admissions cycle due to conflict of interest. I’m an alum interviewer and am familiar with that process. On the one hand, you portray yourself as not wanting to display conflict of interest but on the other hand, in an anonymous fashion, you wish to backstab and sabotage another applicant’s admissions. That’s quite ironic. </p>
<p>I cannot imagine anyone supporting what you propose. I also cannot imagine a college taking your anonymous letter too seriously and may even investigate the origin and it could come back to bite your child if it questionnable as to who from this other kid’s own school may be in competition with this kid and want to sabotage his/her chances. Think about it. Truly, your kid may be harmed by your actions. People figure things out.</p>
<p>By the way, if you do this, are you going to tell your OWN kid? What will your child think of your behavior? Do you want to live with that? Are you going to do it behind your kid’s back? What if your kid finds out? (that could happen) These types of behaviors are things that often can come back full circle. What goes around, often comes around.</p>
<p>I hope this is a joke…but if not, please imagine the shoe on the other foot. If there were online photos of your kid doing something unsavory (and there might be!) would you want someone else sending them to one of his future employers or to the admissions rep?</p>
<p>Even level-headed, nice kids do dumb stuff now and then.</p>
<p>Their parents, however, should be setting a good example. That you even for a moment seriously entertained meddling in this way shows a severe lack of maturity. You are the grown up here. Act like it.</p>
<p>Not believin’ this OP for one second…</p>
<p>At least you did the right thing by recusing yourself from interviewing.</p>
<p>One more thing…if a college receives this anonymous “tip,” they will wonder who was motivated to send it? It likely will point back to your son/daughter, an applicant from the same HS, as suspect. Think about it.</p>
<p>^I imagine it’s standard practice for alum interviews to remove themselves for the cycle during their own child’s graduation year. I know my dad, an alum interviewer for Duke, isn’t allowed to interview this year.</p>
<p>
And what if the school(s) think it is YOUR KID who sent the anonymous info/pictures. Think he/she will win brownie points for “character” in their eyes? You willing to risk your little stunt backfiring? I really have to, HAVE TO hope this is a fake post. If you really are a parent, it saddens me that you would think to do such a thing. Wow.</p>
<p>BTW-- what are you doing on your kids friends fb pages?? I have to assume your kid brought this to your attention. You two need to let it go and not consider the underhanded stunt being discussed here.</p>
<p>Go ahead, send the pics. Your email addy will show up, and admissions will have a blast then denying admission to YOUR child. That you could even THINK of doing such a thing, just to help your child get into a college, is really, really sad. I hope your child has a better moral compass than you. You are an alum of this school. That means that said college already accepts people with poor moral standards, so the student you want to sabotage would fit nicely based on your judgment of their pictures, just like yourself.</p>
<p>To those of you saying that this is wrong, that’s absolutely correct (I also said so earlier).</p>
<p>However, I don’t think it would mean a rejection for the OP’s kid. Think.</p>
<p>1.) There are not only two applicants in the region. The OP seems to think that this student is the “top” competition from his kid’s school, but that does not mean that there are not others who would might find the pictures. There are multiple interviewers that cover just this one school, let alone the other local schools they cover. </p>
<p>2.) Further, colleges picking out the “best” competition of the student being exposed and denying that person would be a travesty. Hell, there’s not even a way to prove that it was an applicant to the school who did this, as it could have just been someone who didn’t like the person and knew where they were applying. Unless the father uses his own email address, puts his address on a physical letter, or tells people, it would be anonymous.</p>
<p>3.) Why would the unknowing kid be held accountable for the father’s actions?</p>
<p>Of course, if it were discovered, I would expect the father to lose his place as an interviewer and his role in the college’s alumni community.</p>
<p>However, I am of the mind that people should refrain from doing wrong things not because they can be punished, but merely because they are wrong.</p>
<p>Further, I continue to assert that the OP was a ■■■■■, but decided to type this explanatory message.</p>
<p>You knew the answer to your question before you made this topic. What really strikes me is that a bunch of high school kids who are replying to you have a better code of ethics than you, a parent.</p>
<p>Billy, of course the reason the OP should not do it is because it would be wrong to take this action. However, some are saying that often when one does something of this nature, it can have repercussions. The potential is there. That is not the deterrent, of course, and one’s moral compass should be. But it is worth pointing out that when one does this sort of thing, it can come back to bite them.</p>
<p>WOW! Are you serious? This is so unbelievably wrong…</p>
<p>What is a ■■■■■? Besides a little ogre who lives under a bridge?</p>
<p>On internet forums, “■■■■■■” are posters who make intentionally false or inflaming posts in order to “■■■■■” for angry comments, or, sometimes, just to be amusing (whether they succeed or not).</p>
<p>Thanks Billy ! You’d think people involved in the college admissions process would have their fill of drama without creating anymore!</p>