<p>Hmm… let’s see. When I was in school way back in the Enlightenment I received 3,000 lire per week (about $5.00). Move forward forty-plus years and it would inflate to about $25 -$30 per week. How does that sound?</p>
<p>My son gets $80 a month. That gives him enough to order out sometimes or go out on the weekend to grab a meal or go to the movies with friends. He does need to budget, however, and often has to pass on ordering out. I am ok with that. I think it’s good for him to learn to budget and he doesn’t need to order out every night or 3-4 times per week which it seems like some kids do. He doesn’t need all that junk. I think it is important to determine what your family can afford and what you think is needed vs. wanted. There will always be plenty of kids at BS who seem to have an endless supply of $ so “keeping up with the Joneses” would get crazy. Another valuable lesson they’ll be learning at BS. :)</p>
<p>For someone who has an “active social life”, $80/month may be a little too little. We tried it out but it didn’t work so well. It seems all the kids DC is associated with have more than that. We now budge $30 a week, and supplement with birthdays/holidays gifts “paid in cash” as DC chose to.</p>
<p>This is great. That’s what I’ll budget. It occurred to me that we dumped $1,500 into her school account so she’d have it for books, spending money, etc. When I subtract out what the school needed from what’s left, it does look like she’s spending about $25 a week not including surprise cash infusions. Hmm - she got a “raise” and I didn’t even know it. :-)</p>
<p>Thanks to all who applied re: the allowance part. I am trying to distract myself from M10. I do think C has a chance to get in at several of the schools but I don’t think that it will work out financially. But I’ve started thinking about expenses such as laundry and allowance and I would want to make C able to participate socially but not extravagantly. DH was at a school where he had no money for social things {I believe his parents could have provided this but did not 
] and I don’t think this is a good idea!</p>
<p>My D is in her sophomore (and first) year at BS - it was her idea entirely. She wanted to back out initially and not even go (she is not a very adventurous spirit), but we wanted her to give it a try. The first few months were a struggle to keep her there, she was so homesick and anxious, but after the holidays she has settled down, made good friends, her grades have improved and she loves it, and wants to stay. We signed up for the laundry service (but she rarely uses it as far as I can tell …?..) and her allowance of 30 dollars a week seems to be enough for her to go out for one or two simple meals on weekends with friends, order take-out Chinese if the dinner choice is a problem or she misses dinner for a practice or meeting on rare occasions, and buy junk food (Captain Crunch and rice crispie treats) for her dorm room. She has not asked for more money. Her roomate is fabulous (from Thailand). </p>
<p>The formal scheduled dinners at BS have had some major unexpected benefits. Her table manners are great, and she blew us away, even at Thanksgiving, with a wonderfully eloquent discussion of Pulitzer prize winning literature - throughout the meal!!! </p>
<p>I was sold, it is the best thing we could have done to send her.</p>
<p>Thank you for sharing, 2prepMom! Your post should be bookmarked and passed along to all the parents who have misgivings and concerns between now and August . . . and then passed along again in September to all the parents struggling with both homesick kids and empty nest syndrome! What a great story about the “light at the end of the tunnel”!</p>
<p>We give $30 per week allowance too. He uses the money to do his laundry, buy toiletries, snack foods and drinks for his dorm room, and go out for a meal or movie with friends on weekends. Also a factor, the cost of living is fairly expensive in the area around his school.</p>
<p>Although it seems like we are on the lower side in terms of allowance, we do cover all toiletries and other essentials. Since we live within a reasonable drive and see him frequently for sporting events, etc. we are always bringing up snacks and food to supplement. I guess it does depend on each family’s circumstances. I felt a little guilty that maybe we weren’t giving him enough but I asked him what he thought about his financial status and he says he’s fine. haha. I was surprised at his honesty and that he wouldn’t just go for extra cash.</p>
<p>^^We do that too. We try to load DC up with toileties and snacks when we come to campus, but that little allowance is dried up pretty quickly when they order pizza with dorm mates, dine out in local restaurants for special occasions, go to a couple of movies, and buy coffee when hanging out with friends… (how far can $20 go?). My idea is that first year we provide more but starting from second year they’re supposed to earn at least part of it through summer jobs.</p>
<p>Officially, we haven’t done allowance at all–our son has a lot of money saved from summer jobs and we expected him to spend his own money. However, his dad slips him twenty dollars or so whenever he sees him, and he’s a tightwad, so he’s only been to cashflow once, I think. I do send cases of snacks through Amazon and buy all his toiletries and clothes. And his grill bill comes straight to us–but it’s never more than 10 dollars a month (helps that he doesn’t like greasy grill food). </p>
<p>Most stuff at school is free, and they don’t seem to do the mall and movies trips, so there’s not much to spend money on, other than the coffee shop and occasional late-night Chinese. At Exeter dorm grill is a relatively inexpensive alternative to take-out, so that might help keep that expense down.</p>
<p>Anyway, my advice would be to start with a low-end allowance and increase as needed.</p>
<p>As we are approaching the last term of the first year at bs, we have found that our experiences has totally exceeded out wildest dreams. It has been all that and more. BS has proved to be exactly what my d needed and she is the better for it. She loves the “controlled freedom” and her most interesting experiences have been those she didnt even know she would have. </p>
<p>Academically she is challenged, in the classroom, for the first time since 2nd grade. Socially she has been introduced to “the kindness of strangers” , faculty children, some drop-dead brilliant classmates and the ugliness of envy and jealousy. She has learned that money doesnt buy happiness and she rather have a mother that she has to call than a parent(s) who dont feel parent weekend is important enough to show up. </p>
<p>I feel my d has matured and has a greater appreciation for the little things and the love of her family. She is more than ready to try new things and realizes that the reason we fall sometimes is to learn how to get up. She has found great strength, leadership and “big sister” friendships from her proctors. She has learned to let more things “roll off her back” and roll with the punches. She fights her own battles better and decides what battles she should even fight. She has seen that it is sometimes better to let someone else win, when not winning is not a big deal to her. </p>
<p>She is growing up and I am extremely proud !</p>
<p>Just my 2 cents!</p>