<p>I spent two years in a community college and didn't have much of a "college experience" there. Now I have transfered to a university and will be getting my bachelors degree after 2 years. I am in a 2 year program with only 9 other students so the class size is very small. All of the people in this program are either in a relationship, married, or engaged. Most of them have already finished a 4 year degree so their prime college years are behind them. In fact, some have mentioned that this program is like grad school to them and they just don't seem like they are in their "young and spirited" college mindset anymore.</p>
<p>This saddens me because I had a very poor high school experience due to a severe anxiety disorder. I saw movies about college and it looked like all the students were partying and generally having a great time and enjoying themselves. I always looked forward to this but now it feels like it will not happen. I have this idea that college is supposed to be like a right of passage where you and the other students go into this new endevour together and you all learn what it means to be adults and how to have mature and fun relationships with others. Indeed, I see groups of friends walking around town on weekends and they are all going from bar to bar, laughing, smiling, and everyone looks pretty happy and adjusted. Well it isn't happening for me. 2 years of college are already behind me and it doesn't look very good right now. I am not making friends and am not having much interaction with the opposite sex (although I am a tall and fairly good looking guy).</p>
<p>I'm not sure what to do now. I'm thinking about going through therapy with a psychologist at my school. I saw a psychiatrist last year and was diagnosed with PTSD as well as major depressive disorder. He put me on medications to alleviate symptoms and it has been very helpful.</p>
<p>There are not very many clubs for me to join (I checked). I haven't met many people outside of the people in my program besides my roomates but they are grad students so they are kinda done with the college fun as well. Furthermore, I live off campus so I feel isolated from the others once I leave and go home. I wish I elected to live in the dorm because those students seem to be going out and making friends with the others on their floor. The 2nd year of this 2 year program will be spent at hospitols doing clinical rotations so I won't even be at this school anymore. So basically I have the rest of this semester as well as the spring semester to figure something out, otherwise it seems like I'm going to really regret that college was such a waste (socially) for me.</p>
<p>Are you at college to have fun and party or are you there to earn an education and then go out to the workforce? At this point, I don’t think there is much you can do. Despite any lack of social “life”, I am actually enjoying college and look forward to doing research with professors and my classes. Similar to you, I hated high school and couldn’t wait to be in college, but for different reasons. </p>
<p>I think you need to get your priorities in order. When you graduate and get a job, then a social life and friends will eventually fall in place.</p>
<p>It can take some time to build stronger friendships. Often even a year passes with someone that you consider more of an aquaintance, and then it becomes a more bonded friendship (this happend with my best friend from college). So that’s the first thing I have to say to you. Give it some time and do join something, even if you think it’s something you aren’t that interested in. Community service projects are a great way to meet other students. And go outside the box of what you know of yourself. Join something you can barely imagine joining, lol! There are so many clubs and organizations --so don’t wait to get involved because they don’t sound interesting to you. Expand what you know of yourself. </p>
<p>It’s when we have expectations that we run the risk of having feelings of disappointment. You sometimes have to let go of those expectations in order to experience the here and now (sorry to get so esoteric on you, but it’s true!). So focus on what’s good about your life right now. You worked hard in cc for a reason and now you are where you said you wanted to be. It’s a part of the human condition to reach a goal you’ve had for a long time and then when you get there…it’s not what you thought it would be, and conclude, “ok, now what? Next goal!”. Well, just let it be what it is for now. Just make small steps in the right direction until you get there. </p>
<p>Do talk to a counselor and take care of yourself while you get your bearings. You’re feeling a huge adjustment in your life and any significant change can throw us off and depression can set in for those that are more prone to it. So yes, by all means talk to a counselor as soon as possible. But also, take care of yourself in all ways. I’m a physiologist, so I can’t help but want to tell you to eat well, get out in the sunshine and exercise/run/walk, take fish oil supplements and vitamin D which are known to help with mood regulation. </p>
<p>I sincerely hope your perspective changes. And if you do give it some time and it doesn’t get better, then start making another plan, ok? But for now, let yourself acknowledge that you’re feeling let down and that usually gets you through to the other side --acceptance of where you’re at. Oddly, sometimes just getting to a place of acceptance seems to alter our perspective. You following me? Good things seem to come into our lives when we are actually happy with how things are…it’s a weird phenomenon…
Best to you!</p>
<p>college life is always one of the best experience to all and it is the basic creation of a bright future life…so every students can enjoy the college life with making of some fun times…but need to give the maximum importance to your studies…make and maintain the fun on one side and the study on the other side…:)</p>
<p>A BS flag is thrown on the play. Everyone always says it’s the best years of your life, but it so isn’t. It’s the worst years of your life that you slog through so you can get a piece of paper which enables you to have enough money to then have the best years of your life.</p>
<p>I currently feel as though college will be what I can look back on as the most “fun” time of my life. College is the one time where you can do whatever you want for yourself. Everything is about you - you can study what you want, explore what you want, be who you want to be. Once you have a full-time job and/or kids you have so much more responsibility. At that point in my life I’m sure that’s what I’ll want and I’ll be bored with partying and such, but I think I’ll look back fondly on college as a time when I got to have as much fun as I wanted.</p>
<p>“College is the one time where you can do whatever you want for yourself. Everything is about you - you can study what you want, explore what you want, be who you want to be.”</p>
<p>So what? You’re allowed to be hideously selfish in college and that’s what makes it great? I don’t think so. And “you can study what you want, explore what you want, be who you want to be” whether your in college or not. </p>
<p>@7thgear,</p>
<p>Don’t worry about missing the “best years of your life”. People say high school is the best years of your life too and they’re not. Old men talk about retirement as the “golden years”. Moms will tell about how much they loved raising kids. Others will tell you about how great their lives were AFTER college. Life is what you make it. Maybe change your outlook a little bit and you’ll see that. </p>
<p>“college life is always one of the best experience to all”</p>
<p>Probably the biggest BS statement you will hear.Not all colleges provide “the best years of your life”.</p>
<p>You said that you are in community college?There’s your problem.Why didn’t you go to a real university as early as possible?You must realize that most students you will meet have HS friends,and that’s it?Was I correct?</p>
<p>Its the college’s fault,not you.You were not in the right environment.</p>
<p>“Don’t worry about missing the “best years of your life”. People say high school is the best years of your life too and they’re not. Old men talk about retirement as the “golden years”. Moms will tell about how much they loved raising kids. Others will tell you about how great their lives were AFTER college. Life is what you make it. Maybe change your outlook a little bit and you’ll see that.”</p>
<p>This is seriously great advice…please heed!</p>
Good things seem to come into our lives when we are actually happy with how things are…it’s a weird phenomenon…