I'm feeling really hopeless and depressed at college

<p>I am going to start my second semester in college next week and i am just dreading it. Going to college has been the hardest thing i ever had to do. When I am there I just have no desire to do anything fun. Its like my mindset is completely changed. I just count down the days until i can go home. I have some friends but I do not enjoy hanging out with them nearly as much as I enjoyed hanging out with my high school friends. I don't have a perfect group of friends like I had in high school. And to make matters worse, one of the few college friends that I like is transferring either next year or the year after. I can't help but compare my old friends to my new ones. I know it has only been a semester but, I don't click with them as much. I just can't shake the feeling that college would be so much better if I had at least one close friend from home with me. I know for a fact if I went to college with one of my best friends i would be having a blast. I feel like I can't have fun or enjoy myself without at least one of them. If I went to school with a friend I would have made sure we stayed in separate dorms so we would have an opportunity to meet our own friends. Just knowing that I have a friend there would make me feel infinitely more comfortable. College is a time to branch out and find yourself without the influence of people you already know. But, maybe I just am not ready yet to be completely on my own. Instead of taking this huge leap, maybe I should have just taken a step. If I went to school with a friend i would still be away from my family and hometown. Going to college still would have been a huge adjustment but, the blow would have been a lot softer. Why did i decide to torture myself like this? Isn't it hard enough being away from home and my family? Why do I have to be away from all of my friends too? Its just all too much for me to handle. I honestly don't think I would have anything to worry about right now i was going to college with a high school friend. I feel like college is killing me. I worry all the time and i feel like after 4 years of this I will just be a shadow of what I once was. </p>

<p>And it doesn't help that all of my friends from high school love college. Not that i want them to be unhappy I just don't want to feel so alone. It makes me feel like something is wrong with me. I feel like everyone is moving on and growing up and I am stuck in this rut. College is supposed to be amazing and I feel like I am missing out. Its just the worst feeling in the world when I am with my high school friends, and relatives or other friends ask us how college is. They all quickly and passionately say, "I love it!" with huge smiles on their faces. I just stand there not saying anything trying to fight the tears that are welling up in my eyes. Why can't I be happy to? Everyone is so excited to go back to school and I feel like I have absolutely nothing to look forward to. To say the least I am jealous of them. They are doing completely fine without me and I am a wreck without them. Nobody deserves to be miserable. I am also afraid that I am going to lose my high school friends and then I will have nobody who I enjoy hanging out with anymore. I am so afraid that my high school friends will replace me.I know for a fact that I will never replace them. How can I compete with friends who they are living with? Its like their new friends are becoming their college family and I want to be a part of it. How can i let go of my old life (without losing my old friends) and embrace college? Can i do it alone?</p>

<p>WOW!!! Maybe you should take therapy classes orrrr (just smoke weed). I really didnt read everything.</p>

<p>It’s okay, I feel how you feel. I was the only person in my group of friends that stayed in state, every single one of my friends are going out of state for college and my other close friends are in state but they go to a different state school. I started college not knowing anyone, and the only friend I really had last semester was my room mate and occasionally I’ll hang out with random groups of people that I’ve met, but it doesn’t feel like high school.</p>

<p>I thought college would be 100 times better than high school, but for me it’s the same…I don’t hate it but I’m not loving it either. I’m kind of in the same situation because my friends are having a blast at their own schools, and over break when we all reunited I felt like we’re slowly drifting apart because were all going separate ways now. I move back this weekend for second semester and I’m nervous…</p>

<p>We should both put ourselves out there and try to make friends, I mean theres so many people in college you have to like somebody and vice versa, right?</p>

<p>Hey so I know its tough. I feel almost exactly the same way as you with all my friends moving in different directions, and feeling like i don’t quite clique with people or have a direction and drive at college. I don’t have any solutions, but I do believe it will get better. On different scales and in different ways everyone feels this at some point. Wether they show it or not, everyone is thinking about how their lives are changing. They are thinking about the people they are leaving behind and the scary parts of the future. I do believe it will get better because statistics don’t lie. There is a large portion of first year college students especially feeling this way, and yet institutions are cranking out tons of grads every year. Hang on! Put yourself out there! Seek happiness! The past is the past and we have to accept that life is changing.</p>

<p>Are you all involved in anything outside of class? Friends aren’t just going to appear at your door… is there something you enjoy doing, a hobby or sport, that you could get involved with on campus to start to branch out and help you start identifying people you would enjoy being with? And remember, good friendships take time to build… all those people you left behind weren’t your very best friend the day you met them. Give people a chance, and get yourself out of your dorm room and give yourself an opportunity to find new friends.</p>

<p>I’m going to be very blunt. Have you considered yourself to have a psychological disorder? Some people that are excessively shy might have them. At the very least, get screened for them. If you do, then meds/therapy can help. If you don’t, then you should be able to self improve in a reasonable amount of time. Either way, having trouble making friends is a very serious issue and you should stop at nothing short anything to correct it.</p>

<p>you gota put yourself more out there</p>

<p>I think you guys are overreacting with the psychological disorder stuff. I’m sure the reason the post seems so depressing is that it is about a depressing topic. I feel the same way in many ways in that I just can’t have fun here. My best friends lie at home but as time passes I have found that my college friends are growing on me. </p>

<p>If you can get involved that would be great. It may be hard but just stick it out and something is bound to work out.</p>

<p>The original post is from 2011…</p>