I’ve posted another thread about not having a roomate for second semester, but I didn’t go into depth about how lonely I am now. We weren’t exactly close when he was here for various reasons but I made an effort, and I understand that you won’t always be close to your roommate. I expected someone new to move in, and I was very excited for a new start and maybe a good friendship, but it doesn’t seem likely that anyone will move in, and that sucks. I am in a spot where I didn’t want to be coming into my first year of college. I am not a naturally outgoing person but I have tried so hard to put myself out there by being friendly the first few weeks of school, and even now at the beginning of second semester, but it feels like my efforts are in vain because I get the feeling that no one that I meet wants to be more than aquantainces with me. I missed opportunities to be friends with people in my hall because my roomate has no interest in meeting anyone and me being standoffish sometimes, just stayed in the room with him for orientation week. I do have a few friends, one that I’ve known since elementary school and we have been getting along great but she has friends of her own and I don’t want to annoy her by constantly asking her to hang out. My other two friends are roommates in a different dorm than me and while they’re nice, they only ask to hang out on the weekends late at night and all one ever wants to do is party. I have no real friends like I did in highschool and I’m just the most depressed I’ve ever been. I’m a naturally optimistic person so I have hope for this semester, but I’m still lonely. It’s hard to fully get the picture from my perspective since this is on a forum but I just feel like giving up sometimes. I’m sorry this is so long but this is where I’m at currently 
Make an appointment at the counseling center at your college. It never hurts to talk things out with a professional and the therapist may have some good ideas/techniques you can use.
Also read through some of the pinned threads on the top of this page.
Yes, thank you. I am definitely planning on talking to a counselor or someone soon.
I agree that counseling services might help.Don’t wait to schedule an appointment, there may be a waiting period for an appointment.
Also, time to reframe your thinking. You can look negatively or positively about not having a roommate at the moment. You could be missing a friend, but you may be gaining (at no extra cost) a semester without roommate problems that can be way more stressful than not having one. You can be grateful that you have a friend since elementary school nearby and enjoy the time you get to spend with him/her even if it’s limited to weekends. Same with the other people you know. You can face reality that it takes time to develop meaningful relationships. Enjoy the level that you have, keep trying to reach out, and let things unfold.
You won’t have friendships if you hole up in your room, but not currently having a roommate isn’t the reason you don’t. It’s a process, not an endpoint. It takes everyday effort. You can do this.
That’s really how growing-up works. When you were in high school, you were much more care free, because our friends were the only life we knew. As we enter the adult world, we single off to our own lives and our own concerns. Of course, friendships are important, but they don’t play as big of a central focus as high school. Sometimes it helps just to give them their space and and not worry too much about them. They’re always going to be there.
Thank you, that really changed my perspective.
You can join a few clubs even though you are not outgoing. It’s something to get you out meeting people.
Yeah, this was a natural feeling for me too when I first transferred to the main campus of my college this past fall.
I’ve always been an introvert and never had many friends in high school (just a handful, but at least I saw and engaged a lot of people every day in school). In college, I was “afraid” of not having anyone to talk to. I set a high priority on trying to make friends and do stuff, but it wasn’t really going great. Everyone seemed to already have their groups and I had no one. Sitting at home on Friday nights was a little depressing, knowing most people were out having “fun.” But I hate crowds, drinking, and partying anyway…so what was I depressed about?
Now that I’m older, I realize that it’s fine to be more independent. In fact, accepting independence is part of growing up and being successful, as another poster mentioned. In fact, the people who continue to “hang out” with their friends and “have fun” all the time really are just remaining children and falling behind, though they don’t realize it.
You’re in college now. Don’t give in to the “picture” that society paints for us. You are there to learn, master a subject, and prepare for a good career and life. You can use free time to do things with other people, but that shouldn’t be #1 on your daily to-do list. You need to do your own thing, and accept it. It’ll be hard, just like it was for me, but you’ll be happier in the end because you’ll feel more in control of your own destiny, focusing on your own needs and life.
Join some clubs you’re interested in or something, and you’ll meet acquaintances that way. That’s how I did it, and it turned out good. I don’t have deep friends that I hang out with all the time…I just have acquaintances that I hang out with when our paths happen to cross. And that’s how it should be. Don’t force anything. Love yourself and focus on what’s important.