Hi! English is not my first language, so the essay part is kind of difficult for me. The grammar part seems easy to me (only 3 wrong) but I think the essay would ruin my score… Can you grade my essay? I don’t really know where I stand now.
Are people more motivated by conscience or by money, power, and fame?
Money, fame, and power are more powerful motivators than conscience. Humans are intelligent animals, and while they are capable of kindness, their own selfish desires are what determine their actions.
The American Wealth Gap clearly proves this point. According to the Washington Times, the top 1% of Americans hold 40% of the country’s wealth, while the bottom 80% holds only 7%. In other words, the top 1% richest people in America own more wealth than the bottom 90%. Such an immense difference would not exist if conscience would be the most powerful motivator. A significant ammount of the country’s citezens are below the povery lines, and most of the wealthiest don’t seem to care about this, since their contributions are rare, and often insignificant. They decide to spend their money on expensive trips, extravagant cars, and other unnecessary things, even though it is a known fact that there are people who starve, or don’t have a place to live in, that need their help.
Game of Thrones is a TV series which the action takes places in a world in which kindness and empathy has little importance, if any. After the kind dies, a number of the characters try to take the power for themselves, and in the process kill a huge number of people. Although they know that an attempt to take over the throne can be very noxious for the realm, and its inhibitants, this fact does not stop them from trying, proving that their thirst for power is the most important motivator for them.
Conscience can be a powerful motivator, but money, fame and power are always more powerful.
