<p>@rcubillos - writing style looks familiar, who are you really?</p>
<p>guy plz grade my essay</p>
<p>Many people admire leaders who have effectively achieved their goals. But too many leaders are dedicated to achieving their goals at the expense of caring for the people who follow and support them. Leaders should be judged on how well they treat people, not on the achievement of their goals.</p>
<p>Assignment: Should leaders be judged according to how well they treat people? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>
<p>It is a cruel world, things that we do with our own life often affect others unintentionally. It is true and we all know that the things that we decided on won’t always be about us, because in the real world you need people to help you achieve your goals. So the question is should leaders be judged according to how well they treat people? Why not?</p>
<p>The ugly truth behind your success is the fact that in order for you to be on top you need to skip past a lot of people. And sometimes you can’t help but walk right through them. So should you be judged according to your action for being successful? Well, yes, because even if you need to step on so many people down the hill to be on top you should not think that it is suppose to be like that. There are ways that you can be successful without affecting others. Don’t forget, without those people you wouldn’t make it up there. We all know the classic story of most of the successful men and women. Most of them started out with nothing but a big goal. Then after a long journey they ended up being successful enough that the people would want to know their story. But how did they do it? In order to achieve your goals you need a lot of hands for help. And that’s something that you can’t help but accept it. If that’s true, why would you want to throw away all those hands of help after reaching your goal? No matter how successful you got into, a special thing about the ugly truth will always be there to remind you. People will talk, and might as well judge. Because a beautiful face just doesn’t mean that it’s a beautiful heart.</p>
<p>To become a leader you need take care of the people. Which is the most important thing about being a leader. If you can’t treat your own people like the way they should be treated it will soon all be gone. We all follow, help and support each other for a reason. And if one day we feel that we no longer feel the importance of doing what we’re doing. It won’t be a surprise if we have decided to leave for good.</p>
<p>assignment question : does progress depend on people with new ideas rather than on people whose ideas are based on the current way of thinking ?</p>
<p>My essay :</p>
<p>Replication ,maybe useful in science and technology of stem calls ,antibiotics , is not a sign of any progression in one’s self or life or behavior .progress ,in general, depends on innovation and creativity . To invent is to create something unprecedented , unseen before. Moving with the current way of thinking of the majority is one way people think as a facile way to progress ,in fact , this is not called progression. this notion can be proved through examples I observed by my naked eyes.</p>
<p>building a helicopter from simple and inexpensive materials was one dream of a poor , limited-financially guy called Ahmed. Despite helicopter"s popularity and banalness worldwide , Ahmed’s invention was respected because of his creativity in building his own’s . his progress was evolving much more whenever somebody knew how he invented it . his invention was made up of used metal canes , wires, recycled nails & lead . complicated as it looks , the invention was indeed a very hard one ,and a new one ,simultaneously .</p>
<p>using imitation as a way of progression with a little differentiation is a misguided method ,I believe . Once in my biology class , we were asked to model a human DNA . having many ideas in our head ,Lucinda and I started working unlike everybody else who just paused ,astonished m having no idea what to do . while working one cam and asked me : " Wow. it seems like you’re going to do something innovative . How are You going to do it ? " I replied : “by using clay and plastic paper .” although i knew her conviction and that her group will try to imitate us , i still told her actually. having submitted our projects by the end of the week , the teacher appreciated ours and ignored theirs for ours was a new idea not just an imitation of someone’s .</p>
<p>In conclusion , I virtue to say that people with new ideas are the real progressives , inventors, and this is the right way for people to go through ,not to just progress depending on the ideas of the others.</p>
<p>can u please rate my essay ?</p>
<p>Hey!<br>
Can u grade my essay plz?<br>
Any advices will be appreciated.<br>
Thank U </p>
<p>Assignment : Do people place too much emphasis on winning ?</p>
<p>Winning and getting a considerable award is a pleasurable moment for any person after a long term of hard work. However, do those who didn’t win must just be considered “Losers”? Mostly, the differences among contestants are subtle. As also those who lost went through sleepless nights to appear good in the competition, “Losers” are only “winners” who weren’t fortunate enough to be awarded.</p>
<p>In addition to, audience realize the value of those who lost, sometimes, even more than they value those who won. Banzeen in the 2009 animation movie Cars was a red car who struggled his whole life to win the Piston Cup in the racing competition. During the race, when Banzeen was just few meters to the Piston Cup, he returned to help another car that got smashed to the side-road and pushed it towards the finish line when a third evil car won the race. Finally, people didn’t give any attention to the winning selfish car. Instead, they acclaimed Banzeen for his genial actions which made him no less than the winner! Banzeen then claimed that prizes are just empty Cups! The cars movie demonstrates how people can value losers, not necessarily winners.</p>
<p>Susan Boel’s Story, too, proves how people don’t put much emphasis on winning. Susan was a contestant in British Got Talent program. After being mocked by the audience and judges for her unorthodox appearance and style, she, surprisingly, got the second rate for her fantastic voice! Even though she wasn’t the first, she was the center of attention because winners aren’t better than losers in anything but in slightly higher number of votes.</p>
<p>Hence, people still put emphasis on valuable qualities possessed by others beside winners, like Banzeen and Susan’ audiences, despite seeking to reward “number one”.</p>
<pre><code> It is without doubt that with the development of human species comes a set of drawbacks. While technology might have contributed to the fact that our next generation places little to no value on privacy, it indubitably has more to do with the people themselves. They are the ones that agree to leave their personal lives vulnerable, and with that decision comes a great deal of disquiet.
Facebook, co-founded by Mark Zuckerberg; Twitter; and all social media websites are some of the reasons why privacy is not as valued as it used to be. The “Like” and “Favorite” factors of Facebook and Twitter respectively are the driven forces of sharing your personal stories. It gives you the motivation to post more of your personal life; people like your status, and you get the satisfaction of knowing that hundreds and maybe even thousands of people like that story. This coupled with the fact that more of these websites are in the making makes it a no-brainer that privacy is indeed not valued anymore.
Recently, people in the United States of America claimed that their government has been and still is spying on them. A few articles on the internet show the leakage of documents between the NSA and a few big companies, social media websites, databases, and many others. Facebook was one of them. It reached a point where Mark Zuckerberg himself had to make an announcement confirming that in no way is he giving personal information to the government. Whether or not these claims are true, it only goes to show that the fact that attempts are being made to invade others’ privacy, and possibly use the information against the people degrades the value of privacy.
Given the above examples, it is obvious that privacy is a factor of life that might cease to exist in the future, who knows? Maybe it is for the best, but for now, it is definitely a factor humans need to value more.
</code></pre>
<p>Assignment : Are people who do not follow society’s traditional paths to advancement more likely to succeed than those who do?</p>
<p>Our society urges us to complete education as it is the normal and conventional way that we should follow. However, what would happen if we didnt use that orthodox path? Will we succeed or fail? Practically, we will succeed because everyone has his or her own way in approaching his or her goals. Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Nelson Mandela are great individuals because they didn’t follow their society’s traditional way of learning. Accordingly, evidence from their lives could be supportive.</p>
<p>Steve Jobs, the inventor of apple company, didn’t complete his education. He thought to himself that traditional ways just lead to traditional endings. Therefore, he thought of skipping high school and start his own business. Although he used an extraordinary way, Steve Jobs succeeded in inventing the most trending Apple products that are still spicy to our present day. If Steve Jobs had approached the normal way that the government teaches, he wouldn’t have invented such a great and league company. As a result, we could then estimate that those who come with new paths to their target, are more likely to succeed than those who stick to the old path.</p>
<p>Bill Gates, the inventor of Microsoft, also had skipped school. In high school, he didn’t get high grades and that had upset him for a long time. Accordingly, he decided to change his life. He decided to quit school and start his own job. Consequently, Bill Gates invented Microsoft, the software operator of computers that still exists in our era. Because Bill Gates used another abnormal way than the normal way, he was able to succeed and become one of the richest people of the world. We could conclude from Bill Gate’s experience is that all those who had changed the world positively and left a significant mark on it, are those who taught themselves how to accomplish goals by themselves; therefore, they reached to the high standards of success.</p>
<p>Talking about success, we cannot neglect Nelson Mandela’s success in beating racism in the Unites States. Nelson Mandela, a black man who fought against racism, didn’t want to see the cruel world and just do nothing about it. He decided the wont just keep calm like the other citizens and leave racism going on in the world. Therefore, Nelson Mandela started getting of the normal path: he started revolution against the government to stop racism. Although he got jailed for 27 years and had suffered a lot, Nelson Mandela didn’t quit until he had reached his goal. Imagine if Nelson Mandela didn’t approach an unconventional way. What would be life like today? Because of Mandela’s actions, people today have the bravery and courage to accept equality and be against disparity.</p>
<p>To conclude, we need extraordinary people like Nelson Mandela, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs to change the world and make it a better world to live in for us and for the coming generations. We should all start being creative and not follow the society’s traditional paths; In fact, we should try to succeed by using marvellous ways.</p>
<p>Prompt: Do we learn more from finding out that we have made mistakes or from our successful actions?</p>
<p>Every human being is prone to making mistakes because life is not perfect. It is an important part of life to learn to fail and look back to fix our failure. Making mistakes and learning from them is what makes us human rather then learning from our successful actions. </p>
<p>Through my actions in life, I have learned from my mistakes and learning from them has made me a better person. If you fail at something, you look back at that mistake and make sure you never do it again. For instance, preparing for the SAT. I have been taking classes and millions of practice tests throughout this year. I have checked my work and seen every mistake I made. After seeing the mistake I made, I know what area I should be focusing on to correct what I did wrong and prevent that mistake from happening again in my next practice test. Doing this has improved my scores and gained my confidence. </p>
<p>We also learn from other peoples mistakes and prevent them from happen. In the autobiography “Breaking Night”, by Liz Murray, Liz lives with her drug addicted parents who are struggling with their addiction, money, and have no education since they dropped out of school. They live in a unsanitary, small apartment. Liz runs away and lives on the streets for a while. She learns to despise drugs and refuses to follow her parents steps. She decided to go to school and work hard while being homeless. All that hardworking paid off and she gets accepted into Harvard. She is now a successful author with a movie dedicated to her autobiography called “Homeless to Harvard.” </p>
<p>Over a carful analysis in my actions in life and liz Murray, learning ones mistakes make us succeed rather then our successful actions. Learning from ours and other peoples mistakes us better people in the future.Without mistakes, we cannot fix our lives for the better. </p>
<p>@Tamieileen, I’ll try grading your essay in the same manner as BeatTheSAT, and if you (or anyone else) would try grading mine in return, I’d be very appreciative 
</p>
<p>I’d give it about a 7-8/12 A bit vague sometimes and could use better examples</p>
<p>Here’s mine…</p>
<p>Prompt: Is it possible for success to be calamitous?</p>
<p>Essay: Just as failure can sometimes lead to a clandestine success, so success can also lead to a a failure. For example, in George Orwell’s “Animal Farm”, the animals succeed in their uprise against the farmer, only to ultimately live a difficult life. Additionally, the novel ‘The Prince and the Pauper’ had a similar turn of events; the young pauper succeeds in becoming a prince, only to find it was not what he expected or wanted. </p>
<pre><code> It was 1921, and the farm animals were toiling hard yet another day. It was prosaic, monotonous, and heavy work, and the time seemed right for a rebellion. After much careful planning and many furtive meetings amongst themselves, they rallied together and drove their enslavers off the farm, pledging that they would never allow themselves to lose their freedom to anyone ever again. Time passed and the swine took over, promising that, under their leadership, life would be more prosperous than ever before. The opposite occured. Slowly the rights of the other animals were stripped away, until life was even worse than it had ever been under the farmer. The realized how good they had had it before, and wished that they had never rebelled. In short they were filled with regret.
Young John Baker lived in sixteenth century England in the slum area of Lowton. He had a secret wish that for even just a day, he could be a prince. One day, he fortuitously met young Edward the current prince of England. Edward had alway wanted to see life outside, so they switch. It was a disaster. Edward was nearly killed.
</code></pre>
<p>@yasmineMH 6/12 Weak examples and broken sentence structures.
@farouz 8-9/12 Good vocab but second example felt like a repeat of the first.</p>
<p>P.S. Even though I used the scoring rubric I realize that I’m not a professional scorer; I may have been too lax or strict. In any case, I hope it helps you!</p>
<p>I’d appreciate it if you’d try scoring mine in return :)</p>
<p>Prompt:
Frederick Douglass once said, “If there is no struggle, there is no progress. This struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, and it may be both moral and physical, but it must be a struggle.” He was right. Progress is something that must be fought for; without conflict, progress simply does not occur.</p>
<h2>Assignment: Does progress result only from struggle and conflict? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</h2>
<p>Every victory sings a saga of a struggle.The life of man is struggle on the earth.Without a struggle we get nowhere.Progress and victory are followed only by courageous efforts. It is indeed the human tendency that makes us insouciant of the things we get without any efforts. A man who wishes to have progress without struggle, must be reminded that there can be no rain without thunder and lightning or no crops without plowing up the ground.</p>
<p>The history has been a keen observer of such struggles which resulted in a triumph. It was on December 1,1955, when the 42 years old African American women named Rosa Parks ignited the quest for freedom and equality among the black. She worked as a seamstress and boarded the Montgomery City bus to go home from work. She sat near the middle of the bus, just behind the 10 seats reserved for whites. Soon all of the seats in the bus were filled. When a white man entered the bus, the driver insisted that all four blacks sitting just behind the white section give up their seats so that the man could sit there. Mrs. Parks refused saying, “No”. She was arrested and convicted of violating the laws of segregation. A group named the Montgomery Improvement Association, composed of local activists and ministers, organized a boycott of the Montgomery bus system. As their leader, they chose a young Baptist minister who was new to Montgomery: Martin Luther King, Jr. was sparked by Mrs. Parks’ action. The boycott lasted 381 days, into December 1956 when the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the segregation law was unconstitutional and the Montgomery buses were integrated. The Montgomery Bus Boycott was the beginning of a revolutionary era of non-violent mass protests in support of civil rights in the United States. It took someone with the courage and character of Rosa Parks to start the struggle which eventually led into victory.</p>
<p>Sometimes struggle are exactly what we need in our life. One day an old man was sitting in his garden when he observed a small cocoon of a butterfly. He saw the butterfly inside the cocoon struggling to get out through a small opening and squeezing its body through the hole. The man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and chopped off the cocoon, setting out the butterfly free. He waited to see the beautiful wings sprawling out of the and wonderful flight to be taken by it. However to his horror it never happened. The butterfly was now crippled for its entire life. What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand the restricting cocoon and the struggle required by the butterfly to get through the opening was a way of forcing the fluid from the body into the wings so that it would be ready for flight once that was achieved. Going through life with no obstacles would cripple us.We will not be as strong as we could have been and we would never fly.</p>
<p>Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle.The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of those depths. The battle of life is, in most cases, fought uphill; and to win it without a struggle were perhaps to win it without honor. If there were no difficulties there would be no success; if there were nothing to struggle for, there would be nothing to be achieved.</p>
<p>I don’t think I’m the right person to grade essays, but if you really do want a score I suppose it would be around 4 on 6. You have quite a few grammatical errors, such as ‘struggle are’ and ‘the history’. I suppose your examples are fairly good, but again I’m not authority on essays. I actually came across this thread in an attempt to find someone to grade my essay. </p>
<p>PROMPT: In his poem ‘In Memoriam’, romantic poet Alfred Lord Tennyson expresses his views that loss is an unavoidable consequence of love. Yet, rather than shunning love because of this, Tennyson resolves to accept both the experience of love and the pain that inevitably comes with it. As he writes in his often quoted passage, “'Tis better to have loved and lost to have not loved at all.”
(Adapted from James R. Kincaid’s Tennyson’s Major Poems)</p>
<p>Assignment: Are people unwise to pursue love even when they know it’ll cause them pain?</p>
<p>ESSAY: It is unwise for people to choose to pursue love against their better judgement, especially when they realise that their decision will eventually cause them pain. Humans may allow their emotions to rule over their reasoning in matters of love. This eventually means that people place greater importance on short-term satisfaction, and conveniently forget the pain that follows an impractical relationship–a highly imprudent choice.</p>
<p>Physical wounds take a definite amount of time to heal,but emotional wounds may have lasting repercussions. In Ayn Rand’s We the Living, Andrei Taganov, initially a stoic and loyal communist, falls irrevocably in love with Kira, the protagonist who herself cares for Andrei only as a friend and is in love with Leo, an aristocrat’s son. Although Andrei finds Kira’s friendship with Leo rather suspicious, he chooses to trust Kira. The revelation of Kira’s relationship with Leo disillusions him, leading * to commit suicide.</p>
<p>The play Romeo and Juliet is also testimony to my thesis. If the two had chosen not to fall in love, both the families would have been spared a lot of sorrow. Love is at times, as the aphorism goes, indeed blind. We must not let our passions sway our hearts and we ought to contemplate over any course of action we choose to take. Most of all, we must never allow our love to adversely affect other aspects of our life–our career and our relationship with others. In matters of the heart, it is best to let the mind take hold of the reins.</p>
<p>*- I omitted the him, silly me. I just didn’t have the time to proofread.</p>
<p>Should people be judged by their potential rather than by their experience and achievements?</p>
<p>Our society relies a tad too much on the experience and achievement levels of a person. This approach is flawed as it is not a true indicator of a person’s abilities. A person’s achievements are a combination of several different factors like luck, the prevailing environment and so on. This is why I shall strive to prove that a man should not be judged on his experience and achievements but should be judged on the basis of his potential.</p>
<p>Roman Polanski was a renowned film director, having won awards like the Golden Globes and the BAFTAs for direction. If he one were to judge him on the basis of his achievements and experience, on would be inclined to think that one day this man would go on to receive an Oscar for direction. Roman was, however, accused of inappropriately behaving with a minor girl, and he fled the United States to avoid arrest. If one were to judge him on his capabilities, his potential, then there is a possibility that they would have seen the true side of this man.</p>
<p>Thomas Alva Edison was one of the greatest inventors this world has ever seen. But, when he was a child, his teacher sent him home with a note that conveyed to his mother that her ward was too stupid to learn. This was because, he had difficulty reading and writing. Essentially, his achievement was that he was not good at reading and writing, which was what his etcher took into account when she wrote that note for his mother. However, Edison’s mother knew the potential of her child, and knew that all he needed was a little encouragement. She gave him that encouragement, and the world was given the gift of light.</p>
<p>The above examples serve to prove that one should not judge a person based on his achievements, as this does not reveal a persons true character. One should instead judge a person based on his potential, as therein we shall know a person much better.</p>
<p>Hi!
I am a student currently studying in India. I’m in my Junior Year preparing for the SAT.
I need help in correcting essays, and am trying to find an online engine or site which will correct my essays. Do you have any idea for the same?
I would really appreciate your help if you could correct my first essay or get it corrected.</p>
<p>Prompt 1
Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and the assignment below.</p>
<p>Many people are philanthropists, giving money to those in need. And many people believe that those who are richthose who can afford to give the mostshould contribute the most to charitable organizations. Others, however, disagree. Why should those who are more fortunate than others have more of a moral obligation to help those who are less fortunate?
Assignment:
Should people who are more fortunate than others have more of a moral obligation to help those who are less fortunate? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.
The rich should, although not legally bliged to do so, donate the most to charity out of moral value. Look at some of the greatest and most admired human beings, not only of today, but also of yesterday, all hoping and striving for a better, more developed tomorrow. John Smithsonian, Shelby Davis and Bill Gates are just a few of the inspiring philanthropists we have seen.
We are who we are today because of those yesterday. John Smithsonian was one man who put the city of Washington D.C on the map, not just as the capital of the country, but as one of the most renowned educational centres and knowledge hubs of the world. Smithsonian pledged $17 million for the upbringing of widespread, widely available knowledge and therefore, the Smithsonian Museums were born, providing academic data to the 1.5 million residents of D.C.
Therefore, through this example, it can be shown that whether Smithsonian was rich or poor, he did it out of the goodness of his heart. He had a moral obligation to do so.
Another rich, talented man, living today, has evolved financial aid for students attending the United States. Shelby Davis, through the Davis Scholarship, has provided scholarships ranging between 50% and 100%, to all United World College (UWC) students wishing to study in USA. Along the same lines, Mahindra United World College of India was established by Mahindra & Mahindra, a multi-national company. What’s remarkable is that all selected students can attend the college free of charge.
It can be seen that these moral acts were done because of the philanthropist’s/company’s moral obligation. Mahindra’s obligation as a well known, well established corporation required (and in this case, legally!) them to do charity work.
As demonstrated by Bill Gates, the richest man in the world (with a net worth of over $60 billion), his moral values led him to form the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, and co-establish the ‘Giving Pledge’ along with Warren Buffet. This pledge is reserved only for billionaires, and all those supporting the cause pledge to donate 50% or more of their wealth while signing the pledge or after death. Many, such as Maggie DuPont, French billionaire, have refused to sign the pledge.
It is seen that many of the richest people in the world are not willing to part with their money. What do the rich do with so much money? Many donate it out of the goodness of their heart, but we must ensure that all millionaires, billionaires, multi-national and multi-million and billion dollar companies follow their moral obligation. The rich must give back to society, as society has done so much for them!</p>
<p>Does anyone want to start a forum on CC where SAT takers come together and grade and discuss each others’ essays? I’ve noticed a lot of people requiring grading help…</p>
<p>Thank you so much for your help, and think about the forum idea!</p>
<p>^I’d suggest forgetting the online engine. Computers are not yet advanced enough to provide meaningful essay scores.</p>
<p>@EliteGoals a forum on here may not be a bad idea though</p>
<p>I think the OP is a ■■■■■. He group PM’d me and a bunch of others with his original post. I replied but got no answer. The whole thing smells fishy.</p>
<p>Can a group of poeple funtion effectively without someone being in charge?
-> “Without a patriarch” goes the archaic adage " any clique would be no more than a headless snake". Indeed, every society need a folk of authority and representative. Although some may contend that having someone of authority would create a sense of duress and pressure, the fact is that a leader functions primarily to maintain the discipline in a society that coin an easy life pattern. This cosmopolitan theme is featured pervasively throughout literature as well as history.
-> One intriguing epitome of the importance of having a leader occurs early in Russel Karen’s amusing St. Lucy’s home for girls raised by wolves, about the evolutions of girls, whose parents are werewolves, trying to fit into human’s society. The girls are adopted into a monastery, with the nuns in charge. As we can easily see, the nuns teach the girls from the most trivial stuffs to the momentous moral lessons. Without the sisters, we can without difficulty assume that the girls would never be able to succeed in their path of being a “complete” human being, instead just pursuing their wild and exuberant ways of living. Therefore, the role of the nuns, in other words, folks of authority, is crucial in the evolution of the girls.
-> The theme that it can be, on the other hand, deleterious to be mavericks is also manifested in The Veldt, Ray Bradbury’s fictional opus. indeed, there are so many instaces that it is hard to single out just one. Following the lines, readers are introduced to the family of George and Lydia. The two parents from the beginning scarcely care about and look after the behaviors of their children. As an aftermath, their kids, Peter and Wendy, develop moral transgressions, predisposing to the cruel and heinous thoughts reflected on the wall of the “Nursery”. Eventually, George and Lydia have to pay the highest and most acrimonious price for their apathy of responsibility: The death by their own offsprings as the thoughts of Peter make a real lion from the fictional Nursery room become real.
-> Conspicuously, the evidences exemplifying our universal theme is not limited to literary instances. By drilling into the ground of history, we may without difficulty find that any groups, from small to puissant, from village to kingdom, need a leader. These representatives maintain the social orders, assuage conflicts and function many significant roles, thus ameliorate their clique. Therefore, if history does repeat itself, then the existence of leaders should always be spotted in any amidst of time.
-> To recapitulate, every society needs a leader.Take note of “The Veldt”, also consider Russel Karen’s intriguing novel. Without leaders, any community would easily turn into a chaotic nightmare.</p>
<p>@Nemesis4 I actually wrote on the same prompt for practice. If I were to give you a grade, I’d probably say a 4 or 5 (maybe leaning towards 5) out of 6. There were a few grammar/spelling errors (not too distracting though), but more importantly, your writing style as a whole isn’t as mature as it should be. Also, I think the first example wasn’t as well supported as the second one. I am in no way an expert on SAT essays though, so don’t take my word for it.</p>
<p>Here’s my essay, hope someone can grade it for me?</p>
<p>Should people be treated according to what they are capable of achieving instead of what they have actually done?</p>
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<p>@mineO3O I am by no means an expert, but I would give that a 5, possibly a 4 though - so maybe an 8 or 9 overall. i think maybe you should write slightly more purely about the topic; the examples you used in my opinion take up too great a proportion of the entire essay. Perhaps develop the opening and ending paragraphs a little more. The examples are great though.</p>
<p>I did the practice sat test today to introduce myself to the world of standardised testing (I’m not from the US) and I was wondering if someone could perhaps score my essay? The e-rater thingie gave it a 12 though I’m not sure how accurate that really is:</p>
<p>Essay Prompt
A colleague of the great scientist James Watson remarked that Watson was always “lounging around, arguing about problems instead of doing experiments.” He concluded that “There is more than one way of doing good science.” It was Watson’s form of idleness, the scientist went on to say, that allowed him to solve “the greatest of all biological problems: the discovery of the structure of DNA.” It is a point worth remembering in a society overly concerned with efficiency.
Adapted from John C. Polanyi, “Understanding Discovery”
Assignment
Do people accomplish more when they are allowed to do things in their own way? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>
<p>My Response
Anyone, when given the chance to do something in the specific way they feel right, will perform better; no two people will ever work at the same level of efficience if forced to do something a certain way. Learning, for example, must be adapted for each and every person to suit them; during my years at school I have a seen many a person achieve the same thing in a plethora of different ways.</p>
<p>Take the task of solving problems in a maths exam - this is no different to James Watson’s activities; it it is simply on a different level or scale. Some people will approach a problem by stopping to appraise it and quickly planning out a response before tackling it, while others will grapple with the problem head on, plunging straight in. </p>
<p>Everyone looks at things differently; when studying texts in lessons, each individual in the class develops their own unique response to the text in question. It is a simple fact of nature that for the most part every person is different and thusly every person will have different viewpoints on different things and every person will adapt any problem to suit himself or herself.</p>
<p>In a a military cadet group I attend, children of my age, including myself, actively organise and plan teaching for those lower down in the group. I have seen many people tackle this in different ways; some will simply stand in front of a group of children and talk passionately about whatever topic they are teaching, while others will spend hours meticulously planning out a lesson and preparing a presentation to deliver to the class. And yet despite these differences in approach each and every one of my fellow senior cadets have all succeeded in delivering the content, successfully burying that knowledge deep into the class’s minds.</p>
<p>Relating more to the scientist James Watson, it is my belief that everyone thinks differently; this surely is explained by logic - no two people on the planet could possibly respond in precisely the same way to any given scenario. Therefore it follows that people will make discoveries in different ways; for some, like Watson, clever ideas can be thought up through relaxing, and allowing the mind to wonder, simply letting one’s thought process carry oneself wherever it wants to go. This is seen also through the art of meditation - meditation is simply relaxing and brings with it a clear, collected head. Others, on the other hand will work constantly and intensely until something manages to be squeezed out of a mind bursting with thought.</p>
<p>These two mentioned ways are only a small example of how people can approach problems in different ways, and there are far too many different kinds of approaches to list. People never think the same way as another and thus letting people work in their own way is the perfect way to ensure maximum performance from any person, no matter who they are; if James Watson accommplished somehting as brilliant as what he did accomplish in a less than orthodox way, then why can’t anyone else?</p>
<p>(The automatic computerised scorer gave this a 12)</p>
<p>Thanks!</p>
<p>^That essay is far from a 12. It appears the writer does not have a good grasp of the english language (you mentioned you are not from the U.S. so that makes sense). The odd thing is that your comments above the essay are well written and appear to be written by a writer whose first language is english.</p>