<p><a href="http://www.becomeaplayer.com%5B/url%5D">www.becomeaplayer.com</a></p>
<p>Maybe the girls you're chasing aren't for you if you are wholly unable to understand them.</p>
<p>And people who expect others to always make the first move are obnoxious.</p>
<p>"If I were just myself, I'd be the most boring, introverted person on earth...and eventually a 75 year old virgin. Lots of people try to change themselevs. But when people say that you should just be yourself, I think that is completely wrong. You have to change yourself a lot of the times to make people like you...aka adjustment. "</p>
<p>HAhah, we should hang out man--I fell the same way you do.</p>
<p>And why are you wondering about this now? Are you after a certain girl and don't know what she thinks of you? If so, why don't you share some of the advancements you have made so far with us?</p>
<p>Sometimes I wish we guys didn't have to take the initiative. It would ne so much easier if girls would just come up to you if they were interested in hanging out. WHy are we the ones who have to deal with rejection and pressure???????</p>
<p>frasifrasi:</p>
<p>You're not always the ones. I'm female and I asked my current boyfriend out. In fact, I know plenty of girls who ask males out...</p>
<p>it's impossible to try to figure out girls. i wouldn't even bother. all you can really do is just make a lot of female friends. you'll eventually get a hit with one of them.
and the advice to just be yourself seems to me to be a bunch of BS. whoever came up with that saying should be revived and shot in the head. if i'm my regular self, i end up with a lot of friends. nothing more than that. that's why i've just given up on ever getting with a girl. just live life and enjoy activities and make enough friends to never feel alone.</p>
<p>I dont' mean to offend every girl, but most girls act too complicated. This is really annoying me because a lot of girls can't just be honest and straightforward. Also, I know most girls want equality and all that, but what gives some girls the right to try and make men inferior to them? It's like your missing the point. And btw I'm not str8, so girls definetely can't manipulate me like some do to str8 guys.</p>
<p>Why are you trying to impress girls? Lol man, while you are trying to impress them, I'm the ******* making fun of them to their face. Its not being a dirtbag, its flirting :p. Most women love it when you tease and play with them, dont be an introverted wuss, get out there and just don't care what they think, it displays confidence. You need to like yourself before others can like you.</p>
<p>By the way, you should be yourself, if you are great. It's only a myth if you are some introverted, awkward person thats afraid of everything. You know how to solve that problem? Take your right hand, shove it down your pants. If you are met with fleshy material and two nice round objects, then you are a man. Start acting like one.</p>
<p>^ Nice, except for the fact that you are flirting with girls. I treat most girls with no respect out of hate.</p>
<p>how come you hate girls?</p>
<p>He's had his soul destroyed by one perhaps?</p>
<p>that's no reason to hate all girls though. it would make more sense if he hated just that one girl that destroyed his soul.</p>
<p>That would be the logical thing to do, but people enjoy stereotyping entire groups of people based on a single incident.</p>
<p>
[quote]
it's impossible to try to figure out girls. i wouldn't even bother. all you can really do is just make a lot of female friends. you'll eventually get a hit with one of them.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>That is so true. You're just friends nothing else. </p>
<p>My roomate told me about his recent experience with this girl. There's this girl he knows that's in his club swim team...they get along really well. Whenever he's around her, she's always laughing and having a good time hanging out with him. Occassionally, she also flirts with him. Before valentine's day my roomate asked her if she wanted to hang out with him and she said YES. The night before valentines day my roomate got flowers and hand made a card for her. The next day he called her and she didnt pick up her phone. He left her text and facebook msgs, and she never replied. My roomate got so ****ed that he threw the flowers and the card.</p>
<p>Two days later, she sent him a facebook msg telling him to back off coz she doesn't want a relationship. How stupid is this?!!</p>
<p>
[quote]
Why are you trying to impress girls? Lol man, while you are trying to impress them, I'm the ******* making fun of them to their face. Its not being a dirtbag, its flirting . Most women love it when you tease and play with them, dont be an introverted wuss, get out there and just don't care what they think, it displays confidence. You need to like yourself before others can like you.</p>
<p>By the way, you should be yourself, if you are great. It's only a myth if you are some introverted, awkward person thats afraid of everything. You know how to solve that problem? Take your right hand, shove it down your pants. If you are met with fleshy material and two nice round objects, then you are a man. Start acting like one.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>I'm not trying to impress them. I just want to be good friends with them, but its just not possible! Occassionally I see the really cute/interesting girl that I want but I just don't bother coz I dont want to make a fool out of myself.</p>
<p>That's it. I'm not talking to girls anymore (unless absolutely necessary).</p>
<p>
[quote]
Sometimes I wish we guys didn't have to take the initiative. It would ne so much easier if girls would just come up to you if they were interested in hanging out. WHy are we the ones who have to deal with rejection and pressure???????
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Ha yeah i so agree with that. I mean, I wouldnt' mind asking them out or anything if they were clear with me from the beginning what they want. I hate it when they give you little hints/clues in the beginning by flirting with you and when you get serious about "going out" they are so freaked out. Just STOP it with the drama!!!</p>
<p>Yes I've had some experiences in college - really good friends in the beginning, then rumors (among our friends) fell that i was gonna ask her out soon (when i really wasnt...but was thinking about it for the future)...and then she stopped talking. Now when we see each other its SOOOO awkward. </p>
<p>Girls...<em>sigh</em></p>
<p>who is this girl? Is she white?</p>
<p>^ Ha...no. Its worse with them, so i don't even bother.</p>
<p>That's why I asked : )</p>
<p>hmm interesting...the guy i was seeing wanted me to be completely honest about how i was feeling...so i'd tell him when i was upset, sad, etc...and i guess he didn't like that...haha =P</p>
<p>"That is so true. You're just friends nothing else.</p>
<p>My roomate told me about his recent experience with this girl. There's this girl he knows that's in his club swim team...they get along really well. Whenever he's around her, she's always laughing and having a good time hanging out with him. Occassionally, she also flirts with him. Before valentine's day my roomate asked her if she wanted to hang out with him and she said YES. The night before valentines day my roomate got flowers and hand made a card for her. The next day he called her and she didnt pick up her phone. He left her text and facebook msgs, and she never replied. My roomate got so ****ed that he threw the flowers and the card.</p>
<p>Two days later, she sent him a facebook msg telling him to back off coz she doesn't want a relationship. How stupid is this?!!"</p>
<p>Not stupid at all. Let's break down what happened here:</p>
<p>"Whenever he's around her, she's always laughing and having a good time hanging out with him."</p>
<p>Because she's laughing doesn't mean she's attracted to him. In fact alot of times when a girl laughs TOO much you become more friend material than relationship material. It's good to joke around, but when you aren't serious enough about your intentions its only right for her to assume you want to be friends, she's not in his head.</p>
<p>"Occassionally, she also flirts with him."</p>
<p>Again, in case you haven't noticed, girls (and all guys should but they don't for some ridiculous reason), flirt. Its part of nature. That doesn't mean they want a relationship.</p>
<p>"Before valentine's day my roomate asked her if she wanted to hang out with him and she said YES."</p>
<p>If he asked her to hang out on valentine's day a host of things couldve happen:
1. She didn't wanna be rude and just say no.. so instead she ignored the calls. This is classic chick logic. Learn to deal with it, your in college.
2. She didn't wanna mislead your friend, so she didn't pick up her phone, again chick logic.
3. She realized AFTER the fact that your friend wanted something more from her, but she had already decided he was just going to be friends.</p>
<p>"Two days later, she sent him a facebook msg telling him to back off coz she doesn't want a relationship."</p>
<p>I've noticed that alot of women are spineless people (I still love yall though :p). THey don't like to be direct, and they don't like giving direct answers that would upset people. So instead they try to find ways to avoid the situations, and usually this just makes it worse. Right here is when she finally just manned up and told your friend that he was a friend.</p>
<p>"I'm not trying to impress them. I just want to be good friends with them, but its just not possible! Occassionally I see the really cute/interesting girl that I want but I just don't bother coz I dont want to make a fool out of myself."</p>
<p>Ok man, look. You see a hot girl. Gorgeous. And she's reading voltaire (or whatever you like, you seem like an intellectual). You walk over and say hi. She ignores you, or runs away screaming. What happens afterwards? Absolutely NOTHING. God doesn't come down and doom you to hell, your entire college doesn't go around laughing at you, nothing. You've got a fear in your head that DOESN'T exist. Chances are that girls gonna look up, smile, she'll warm your insides like the pillsbury doughboy and the next thing you know you two are doing the no pants tango. You never know what the hell is going to happen, but i can guarantee you that rejection is always better than regret.</p>
<p>Also, stop lying to yourself, you are only hindering the process. When you first see an attractive girl you don't think, "Wow I'd really like to be friends and play yahtzee with her". This is your problem. You aren't being REAL. You know why alot of girls like the jocks and the *******s? Its not because they are jerks, its because they are genuine about what they want, there's no questions asked. Ask a girl if she's more wary of a shy guy thats always staring at her never saying anything, or some loud jock shoutin her out from his car? She KNOWS what the jock wants, she doesn't KNOW what you want, and people fear the unknown.</p>
<p>"Ha yeah i so agree with that. I mean, I wouldnt' mind asking them out or anything if they were clear with me from the beginning what they want. I hate it when they give you little hints/clues in the beginning by flirting with you and when you get serious about "going out" they are so freaked out. Just STOP it with the drama!!!</p>
<p>Yes I've had some experiences in college - really good friends in the beginning, then rumors (among our friends) fell that i was gonna ask her out soon (when i really wasnt...but was thinking about it for the future)...and then she stopped talking. Now when we see each other its SOOOO awkward.</p>
<p>Girls...<em>sigh</em>"</p>
<p>Girls are not clear creatures. If you were to look at yourself from the outside, neither are you. Just because you know that you like her doesn't mean she does, no matter how many "hints" you think your giving. Think about it this way, with your closest friends, you can tell how they are feeling just by small facial expressions. However, on someone you just met, it takes a while to calibrate how they act and you have to pay more attention to them to see how they feel. Why do you think actors get paid so much? Next time you are watching TV, I suggest you look at all the people on shows, and see how overexaggerated there expressions are. THEY HAVE TO BE TO PRESERVE THE ILLUSION OF REALITY. When people are angry or sad in a movie, you KNOW it. How? They have over exaggerated facial expressions. Its the same thing with women, you need to make yourself clear in every way what you want, then she can decide if she wants the same thing, and if she doesn't? Her loss, move on, you are at college, there are thousands more women.</p>
<p>You've gotta get over the idea of one perfect woman, otherwise you are gonna put tremendous pressure on yourself whenever you meet a new woman. Look at it this way, if your dream girl is one in a million, that means there are 300 of her in America, 1600 of her in c hina, 1000 of her in russia 150 in Japan, etc etc, there are THOUSANDS OF YOUR "dream girl" out there, you need to start living life and enjoying it, instead of trying to find a partner. stop looking for relationships so early, mess around, figure out the type of woman you WANT first, and then go after her. I mean really think about it, how many guys can honestly say they know the type of woman they want? If you can't, thats where you need to START.</p>