Good reason:
Boarding schools allow kids to get more done in a day. Our LPS isn’t an option. We have many boarding schools in the area that DS could attend as a day student, but then we would still have the same issues we have with him attending his current private school about 35 minutes away. Between sports, tutoring, commuting, etc. he is almost never in the neighborhood, so has very little chance to plan social activities with kids in town, but he also lives 45 minutes from his closest friends at school. And between the commute to school and driving to sports and tutoring, it leaves even less time in his day for other extracurricular activities he’d like to try. We had already decided that even if he went to one of the local boarding schools, he’d apply as a boarder rather than a day student so that he can have more of a social life and more time to engage in more activities. At that point, there really wasn’t a reason to stay local, so threw the doors wide open.
How about marrying well? I am not sure if it’s a good reason but can’t say it’s a bad reason either, since I can see how it worked well for some.
@SculptorDad it’s just WAY too soon for us to be thinking about that!
Pretty sure that’s not why you chose Grier, @SculptorDad
Befriending those from upper socio-economic class is certainly a big plus of boarding school. Alas, she doesn’t see benefit of marriage even if she were in a co-ed school.
the best reason: the people. the schools with means attract a vibrant group of smart, hard-working kids, many of whom get financial aid, able to take advantage of the wealth of opportunity at an elite boarding school. similar sorts of teachers, too. very good.
the worst reason: the people. those schools also attract their traditional demographic of loathsome upper-class twits and fatuous, self-satisfied sons and daughters of wretched privilege who hate being there and willfully waste everyone’s time and all the opportunities ever presented to them because they just don’t care and/or don’t know any better. similar sorts of teachers, too. not good.
that’s the bitter with the sweet. go into it with your eyes open and remember why you’re there. not every smart kid is cut out for these schools, and too many are disheartened when they get to their dream school and meet kids who are absolute zeroes or math “teachers” who are really hockey coaches. they think it’ll be 600 kids more or less like them, and it’s not. it never is. that’s racing. i always advocate for the right kids taking a shot at schools like this, but i want them to see the schools as they really are and get every single they can from the experience no matter what. for the right kids, with some brains and a little bit of moxie–literal moxie the gross soda–an elite boarding school is a wonderland.
another reason includes not–not!–getting drunk or high on a weekday afternoon five weeks before graduation at a day student or fac brat’s house and then crashing back onto campus where they need to be hidden in a basement for hours till they sober up. that is a bad reason. don’t do that.
Our reasons:
- Prepare them for success in college by sending them to a school where the small class sizes and rigorous curriculum will ensure they learn how to study, manage their time, think critically, and write well
- Teach them what it means to be an engaged member of a community and get along with others
- Surround them with wise adults who can guide them at an age when they are starting to tune out the specific frequency of their parents’ voices
- Encourage their independence by eliminating the possibility that you’ll “slip” by doing their laundry or delivering a forgotten paper “just this once”
I’d add exposing them to an extremely diverse (in all senses of the word) community, pushing them out of their comfort zones ever so supportively, and giving them opportunities in class and within the class day (but outside of class) to prepare for standardized tests and teh rigors of college. To the latter, we would not have had the time, nor would DS have had the right mind set, to undertake the prep and tutoring that the school built into the class day.
We did not SEND him, it was always his choice, despite the horrified feedback we get on a frequent basis from families in our non-boarding school-oriented community. And despite our families’ experience with BS, I have tried VERY hard to allow DS to make this this OWN experience, and not force him to hear a re-living of mine.
@GnarWhail, In real life, I feel that neither smart and poor kids nor rich and spoiled kids are so common as to warrant your concern. At least mine finds only a small group of the latter in her school, not enough to negatively affect her experience.
Sadly, socio-economic inequality in the U.S. seems is working from the birth. It gets increasingly harder to perform well on either academics or iq tests growing up in poverty, or to build up serious character flaws when their rich parents are getting smarter on value of good character building on their kids’ success.
Funny how @hellomaisy’s reasons sound like ours…
We have only reasons as below:
- Opportunity in many subjects beyond APs classes
- Kids figure out what they want to pursue in life
- Great opportunities in multiple fields while cost are bare minimum
- Networking
- Foreign travels to many awesome places that we could have never afforded to sent
- Entrance to top free summer program based on prep school name and performance in the school
- Extremely supportive school faculty who nurture kids
- Most important for us – better communication skills, technically our Asians kid would have done just fine, but because of English proficiency limit their career upward mobility
Lots of threads on this question:
See post #33 in link above. 
No, zero regrets on our end but, more importantly, zero regrets on our son’s end.
ETA: I’ve asked the mods to move this thread to the Prep School Parents forum for input from parents who have made this decision. MODERATOR’S NOTE: I actually merged the two threads.
A few comments:
a) it seems that most of the reasons to send your kids to BS could be accomplished sending your kids to private HS?;
b) as a parent of 2 kids, one in middle school and one in high school, I treasure every day I get to spend with them. They grow up so fast as it is, I just can’t imagine sending them away when they are freshman (14) in HS;
c) do kids really want to go to boarding schools on there own without being influenced by their parents, friends, extended family? I know when I was in school, no student ever thought about it, nor has my kids or any of their friends considered it. Maybe it’s a more of a NE thing? IDK
If any of our local high schools could accomplish what our son got from his BS, believe me, we would have kept him home. We only considered BS when we had exhausted our local options.
No kid here was “sent away.” Again, that is misinformed. Just read the posts from all the kids here who are waiting excitedly for their BS decisions on March 10. The kids themselves will give you your best answers. (The boarding schools interview each applicant privately to determine whose idea it is to attend BS. Parents pushing that decision rarely works well for anyone.)
BS is not for everyone. If you don’t have a compelling reason to provide this option for your child, then no need to consider it.
@socaldad2002 Do you realize boarding schools give long breaks? I have seen my kid for quality time once a month due to dropoff week in August (yes I stayed around for a week 
), Parents Weekend in October, long Thanskgiving break, long Holiday Break, coming up 2-wk Spring break in late Feb/early March, then a long weekend in April. In between, he is living and being educated in an amazing environment which is far better than our public school offers, on many levels (depth of education, cultural experience, natural beauty, sports, other extracurriculars, amazing leadership of teachers and staff, etc).
In his case, it is also less of a grind mentality than our competitive public HS. The private day schools near us tend to be full of snobby kids. The boarding schools, in my opinion, teach more character and humility. Yes, my child wanted to go on his own, but he was 11th grader and 17yo, and mature. The siblings are so impressed with his experience that they may also want to go (#2 won’t though, he is already in 10th in public) and we need to see if it’s realistic for #3 as we will have 2 in college then.
@socaldad2002 – you’ll have to go through this whole thread, but a BS can assemble a community that is much richer than any day school because it’s not limited by geography. And for kids with a lot of interests, it can schedule them so that they don’t have choose between being in a play and playing lax and working on the newspaper – the kids are there 24/7, so can meet after dinner, etc. The scheduling is very different. And the schools realize that even kids who are pretty independent need a lot of supervision and support so it’s a much more gentle ramp to the kind of independence a kid will need for college.
If you love what a BS offers and want to keep your kid at home, many have spaces for some day students.
In the end, though, the kid has to want it and the parents have to feel like it’s going to be the right thing for both the kid and themselves. Frankly, lots of kids (and their parents!) aren’t ready for this. And if you have good local alternatives, there may no reason to spend ANY time deciding whether your kid would benefit from it.
Something no one mentioned. For kids who are really strong in an area, they can create their own courses. If accepted that is the thing my kiddo is looking forward to at BS. Being able to do high level math, science, English, history or really any subject is a joy! Any school that didn’t offer this was dropped immediately. For kids who have been in a public ( common core-ugh) or even private school that cannot keep up with their intellectual needs this is a wonderful thing. I’m just sad that there so few spots in BS, for a place that so obviously advances intellectual curiousity. People want to go because it’s a bragging right or they want to get in some college rather than to learn.
Great point @Happytimes2001 -My son also went because his intellectual curiosity was not supported at public school. It’s more of a competitive environment rather than one where an individual can seek out greater depth of learning. And, BS don’t need to waste time preparing for standardized tests.
@socaldad2002 first, I think “send” should be deleted from the title of this thread. "Good and bad reasons to ALLOW you kid to go to boarding school " is more applicable. My DS asked to go to BS at age 9. Read other threads…I’ve mentioned this a lot. I practically yelled “no!” But we live in Texas (so, not a NE thing) and he plays hockey. He’s obsessed with the sport. In order to play hockey, we had to drive over 300 miles one way. We did–for over 7 years. Because we don’t live in big city Texas. We don’t have several private schools to choose from. In addition, our public school system is so bad, the state has had it on probation for the last two years because they aren’t meeting basic standards. DS is a bright kid…I won’t go into his academic accolades, but let’s just say I’m not exaggerating. He’s a good hockey player…he made the cut for the Dallas AAA team…but I don’t have a private jet, so getting him the 700 miles back and forth multiple times per week was just not feasible. Needless to say, I realized his foresight into the BS route and also realized his dedication in getting there, so I embraced it.
Now, I see that BS is not just about the sports & academic opportunities that we do not have here…it is about the community of people from all different walks of life, with a vast variety of experiences he’s surrounded by. Trying things he never would have had in front of him…short film production, for example…
Boarding school does not run in either side of our families and I can assure you, very few people in this town consider it. We were confronted by many a naysayer (including my mother) who asked the same question “why would you send him to BS?” And my reply to them is the same to you…I allowed my son to accomplish his dream of going to boarding school.
I’ve never made a better decision in my life.
Oh…DD is now researching BSs. I will also allow her to go, should she still desire when her application season arrives.
^past the point of edit (wrote in carpool line and just now reread) but realize parts of my comment may seem arrogant…not my intent by any means… I just meant to illustrate that a smart kid in a school district that can’t even teach basics/meet lowest standards needs more of an academic challenge. My apologies to how that may have come across. I should not multitask
@buuzn03 I love your posts 
The commute for sports or private schools not immediately located to your community make BS such an attractive option. Though after reading about your 300 mile commute, I’ll never complain about the 20 mile commute I do three or four times a week for my son’s obsession with hockey!