Grade my non-formulaic SAT essay

<p>Prompt: Is it sometimes necessary to be impolite?</p>

<p>"No, I will not yield yield the floor!" boomed representative Anthony Weiner, while delivering an impassioned speech in the House of Represantatives. The Democratic congressman, like so many others throughout history, had learned through experience that manners can only get you so far. Though the crudeness of his actions did inflame partisan differences, Weiner's impropriety embodied a fundamental truth of the American essence: that rugged impoliteness yields grander results than adhering to formality. We see this in both the American revolution and the 1960's counterculture movement.</p>

<p>Vicious acts of protest, such as the Boston Tea Party could hardly be considered polite, but they were certainly effective. After almost a century of obsequious mercantalism, the men and women of the American colonies decided to stand up for themselves through active protest, bypassing the authority of parliament, and taking the weight of justice on their own backs. "No taxation without representation!" was their demand. "Live free or die!" was philosophy with which they would pursue it. Weathering the Stamp Act, the Sugar Act, and finally the intolerable Act, they finally decided to act upon it, when war broke out in Lexington and Concord. Was this a "civil" way to cease their will? No. Was it an effective one? Today, as we approach the 235th anniversary of American independence, I think we can say so.</p>

<p>The 1960's, a time when the air was laced with teargas and marijuana smoke, can hardly be said to have fostered civil behavior. Radicals such as the Black Panthers and the Weatherman met with police nightsticks on an almost routine schedule. So what virtue can we extract from this time of impolite unrest? In fact, we can say though boisterous, this time was progressive. It saw the 1965 Civil Rights Act, much due to the persuasion of radical activists, which expanded freedoms for minorities and promised protection from discrimination. It also saw one of the most fruitful dialogues about the role of our nation and its foreign policy with regard to its involvement in Vietnam. The 1960's show how impoliteness can move us towards a "Great Society."</p>

<p>Being impolite is, at times, more than just a good idea: it can be crucial to progress. Imagine our fate had we Americans not been impolite, subservient to the British and ripe with racism. Let us cast away our civility in dire circumstance.</p>

<p>I liked this essay. Def. 12/12!</p>

<p>Ditto… Perfect score.</p>

<p>The use of pronouns like “I,” “we,” and “us” as well as the kinda cheesy rhetorical questions detract from the formality of the essay (which, in turn, detract from the persuasiveness of the essay).</p>

<p>This essay may garner you a 6 from some graders and a 5 from others. You obviously have incredible writing skill. If you want a 99%-guaranteed 12, I’d suggest you follow the standard essay formula (which you basically have) and be super, super formal. With this, you could pull anywhere from a 10 to a 12, IMO.</p>

<p>Please PM me or something to let me know if you don’t understand what I mean by what I’ve written above.</p>