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<p>I agree to an extent. That attitude is just annoying. If anyone really thinks the patriarchy in our society is so oppressive that they have to open doors themselves then go ahead. That is your problem, but don’t insult the men who are doing it to simply be polite.</p>
<p>I was going to say that Vehicle made some mistakes in criticizing peter_parker; his experiences are very different from hers, and the truth at hand is a heavy localized truth. Then he posted something making sweeping presumptions about her reality, and with that they are failing to catch something a bit critical here: these people need to just do what works for them and stop interjecting in other people’s business.</p>
<p>When person A and person B do the same thing with persons C, they might be communicating things completely different to persons C. The persons C may well have relationships with A and B that screen different interpretations of their actions; you can’t judge this payment thing without the context, and these generalizations come off as silly when peter_parker denies the validity of Vehicle’s algorithm (and vice versa).</p>
<p>-@Dbate: Well… the attitude I was complaining about was guys feeling insignificant when their help isn’t wanted. It’s insecure. Someone who helps just to be nice wouldn’t feel put out when the help is refused.</p>
<p>Yeah, women’s lib is soooo pretentious when you get to wear pants and have careers and go to coed colleges… I mean, really, how stuck-up. </p>
<p>I feel like any guy who needs to do something to feel like a man is by default not a man. Why is manhood so fragile if men are supposedly so tough?</p>
<p>
Let me fix that for you:
Now get some therapy. It doesn’t have to be professional.</p>
<p>More like… “Your ‘I can do everything for myself because I feel like you’re trying to degrade and insult me by doing something as polite as open a door for me and instead of realizing that’s a nice gesture I like to think of it as being a sexist as well as a move to demean me with an ulterior motive’ attitude ruins it for me. Period.” </p>
<p>Seriously, these kinds of people are annoying. They remind me of feminists who aren’t really trying to go for equal rights, but instead use it as a facade to hide behind to be superior. In other words, fake.</p>
<p>I must admit that I haven’t read everything on this thread so don’t kill me if I repeat something someone has already said. </p>
<p>I personally believe that guys offer to pay, open doors, and carry stuff for their lady companions because its just a nice thing to do. I, like probably many others on this forum, have been brought up to treat women like that whether I know her or not, hate her or love her. In no way do I think that women are inferior to men. Like I said before I do it mostly as a nice gesture. However, when a guy goes out of the way to perform these actions then offense may be taken but even so, the guy is probably doing it because he is very attracted to you. Be happy that you have a guy like that.</p>
<p>peter_parker, your posts reek of hubris and condescension, sometimes to the point of rudeness. Your head seems to be inflated to the size of a hot-air balloon.</p>
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<p>My condolences to those girls.</p>
<p>I have a feeling this thread will never die… :P</p>
<p>chivalry is dead…and the woman has killed it</p>
<p>To the original poster-</p>
<p>If having a guy pay for your meals and open doors for you makes you feel like a prostitute, then I would also suggest that you avoid shaving your legs, wearing makeup, and showering.</p>
<p>^I don’t understand that?</p>
<p>haven’t read the thread…
I’m a guy. And don’t open doors or pay for girls unless they request it, otherwise I just assume we’re going to split costs. Never really seen the point in it tbh, and I have had one or two complaints from some girls, but that never really botherred me either lol. If I’m interested in a girl, then she’s gonna find out, but not by having me open her door and pay her dinner…</p>
<p>me neither, but let me guess what is going on . . .</p>
<p>men are overreacting to women’s refusal to go along with antiquated gender roles</p>
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<p>Men are overreacting? You do know that the original poster in this thread was freaking out about people holding the door for her and compared a free dinner to prostitution, correct?</p>
<p>Yeah, but she clearly was self-aware about her exaggeration.</p>
<p>You def. overreacted with your showering bit. You can choose which gender roles you’d like to adopt you know. Some are more innocent than others. It’s a free country.</p>
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<p>How did I overreact? I was merely following the logical extension of the OP’s train of thought. If it is submissive to have a man open a door for you, surely it is submissive to shave your legs and wear makeup so that you will look more attractive to him.</p>
<p>the poster audibly sighs. “did you read my post?” he asks.</p>
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<p>i meant the word innocuous, not innocent. my bad. anyway, this isn’t like a math problem. you get to pick and choose what you want to do. there isn’t a logical necessity that keeps you from shaving your legs if you don’t like it when men take the check.</p>
<p>for the record, i think carrying stuff and holding open doors is prob. not something to get worried too much about, but i can see why women would complain about the men taking the check.</p>
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<p>So in other words, there is a ridiculous double standard that exists?</p>
<p>I open doors for humans. Humans open doors for me.</p>