<p>I don’t think a smart intellectual kid can just declare he’s not academically minded, and that’s why he’s not interested in college. Many kids sleep through boring classes in high school, and it can be so much better in college. Many boys don’t want to achieve high grades just because, but may do fantastic when the subject grabs their interest. Things can change dramatically in college, when they can actually choose their classes and their teachers.</p>
<p>It makes me wonder if you can grab his interest by taking a look at schools that have good theatre programs. If he starts thinking that maybe he could major in theatre, perhaps he’d have an entirely different outlook on going to college. It would be best to not talk obsessively about college (like most of us here on cc), but happen to check out some nearby schools when you go on a family vacation…very conveniently, of course. And while there are those who think, “No, don’t major in theatre,” there are so many opportunities to double major. They change their minds all the time anyways. Seems the first trick is to grab his interest, so he might start thinking about this. Get him to the schools that have many options and would be the right environment, and who knows what he’ll end up doing. So that would mean, make sure he chooses a school with a good range of majors, not just an arts school.</p>
<p>From the sounds of it, this doesn’t sound like a kid who shouldn’t go to college. This just seems like he needs to find the right situation. Theatre for an aspie seems like a very smart way to go, it can only help him.</p>
<p>Thanks again, busdriver. I think part of his “no college” thinking is because he constantly compares himself to his older sister, who graduated as salutatorian last year. Like the rest of the school, DS had to sit through Class Day in which she got several awards. It was awful for him, even though she was very humble about everything. </p>
<p>DH and I pointed out that most kids don’t get any awards and that most of them go on to lead productive happy lives, and his teachers are good about not comparing siblings.</p>
<p>I have no problem with a theatre major at all. I just want him to be fulfilled in his career and personal life! We got off the prestige treadmill a couple of years ago, when both kids were miserable and depressed because of school pressures and we all needed to figure out what was valuable. Harvard isn’t it!</p>
<p>I can see how that would be tough for him. Hopefully his sister isn’t an incredible actress also, so theatre can be something that is just for him, and completely different from her accomplishments. It’s not like it’s Harvard or bust, that probably wouldn’t have even been the right school for him anyways!</p>
<p>You can get really caught up into the grade thing, and the competition, and how incredibly important it is to get into X or Y college, in retrospect it seems kind of trivial. Sounds like you guys have the big picture in life.</p>
<p>I found out recently that my (Aspie) kid apparently believed that college would be like four years of advanced high school – same teaching methods, same kids, same activities, etc. </p>
<p>Since then, we’ve visited a few schools, had him sit in on some classes – and now he’s really excited about college. You might want to ask him what he thinks college is going to be like, and then set out correcting any sorts of strange assumptions he may have made. </p>
<p>I assumed he would know about things like seminars, papers vs. homework, the flexibility to choose your own classes, how often classes met – but he didn’t. He needed to be explicitly told.</p>
<p>Your son is only a junior, not a senior needing to make the college decision this fall. He needs to discuss his situation with his guidance counselor. He could need reasons to choose college, right now he may be bored in many classes. As above- he doesn’t realize how different college can be compared to HS. </p>
<p>This is the year for him to explore different colleges. He could be excited about the possibilities of choosing what he wants to study instead of all of those required HS courses.</p>
<p>Momzie and wis75, your posts are quite timely. Yesterday, DS said he hadn’t realized that he wouldn’t need to take math every year in college or that he wouldn’t be in class all day long. He was so relieved to hear that once he got the core classes out of the way, he could take anything he wanted. Sometimes I forget how literal he is and how much he doesn’t just glean from his environment.</p>
<p>Maybe look at schools without distribution/core requirements. Brown, Amherst, Benniington, Sarah Lawrence, Hampshire, maybe Vassar (?)…there are many more.</p>