<p>To explain the desire to triple major - daughter is coming in with 27 credits which pretty much covers all required classes like science, humanities, etc. She's going to try business because we all think it's a good choice for someone who wants a good job and isn't very good at math or science (I know there are many arguments against this but business is the most popular major in the country). Because we know lots of people who for various reasons wanted to get teaching degrees after they had been in the business world for a while, it seemed like a good idea to try to pick up an education major. Also, my daughter loves kids and would probably like to be a teacher but she also wants to make a decent salary. If you do education, you also have to major (although the requirements aren't as onerous) in something like math or Spanish. Thus the three majors. If you add up all the credits needed, she could do it although I didn't factor in scheduling difficulties.</p>
<p>Sounds like your daughter doesn't really know what "she" wants. I say pick one major and maybe one minor and get through the first year. Freshman year is a time to explore a whole new world of classes that were not offered in high school. Most 17-18 year olds have no idea what they want to do the rest of their lives; give her a chance to spread her wings!</p>
<p>Give her guidance, but don't make her choices for her. With all her credits she has time to see what is out there. If she decides on business school or education, she can always go to grad school for the one she didn't major in now.</p>
<p>Oh, and BTW, I am a helicopter parent that is slowly learning to back off. It is hard, but I need to do it!!</p>
<p>What about not worrying about it and plan on 9 semesters instead of 8? That give you a little more wiggle room and reduces stress considerably.</p>
<p>I have to say that sometimes the parent does have to step in and get things done at University. If your daughter was telling you that her advisor was unattentive and that she hasn't gotten the courses she would like and has obviously given her shot at this, it is time for a parent to step in and see what influence she can exert.</p>
<p>My son makes his own schedule, meets with his advisors and does his own thing, he also got his advisor changed because he wasn't happy with the first one on his own...however, if there is a problem he cannot resolve, then I will step in. Unfortunately when a parent gets on the phone, the University can change it's tune pretty quickly from "sorry that can't be done." to "yes, Mrs. xyz, we will make sure that is taken care of." </p>
<p>My son also goes to private University and I find that they are very eager to please the parents.</p>
<p>I don't know, but I have had 2 kids at separate private universities and the only phone call we have made is to the bursars office regarding bills. And we are responsible for the bills. When there has been any issue of scheduling (or anything else for that matter) we have always talked it through and given our advice (when asked for) to our student and let him figure out how to navigate the university. The absolute only exception we have made from this philosophy was in assisting our 3rd child deal with the Office for Students with Disabilities at the U she will be attending in the fall. I made the initial call and was firmly, but politely told that my student should be instigating the procedure. And she did..made the next call, asked me to help prepare the necessary documentation and she took it from there. AS far as class scheduling is concerned..I wouldn't even know where to begin since I don't have access to their on-campus system passwords etc. I never asked, they never offered. With S1 a grade report was sent home, with S2 I ask to see the on-line grade report and he willingly complies. D will be attending the same school as S1, so we will get the grade report directly again. That's about all we've ever been directly involved with. I'd rather be involved with my kid, than the school.</p>
<p>Lily, do you plan to be the one to call HR to intervene when your son's paycheck has the wrong amount withdrawn for his medical benefits? Will you triage with the IRS when his social security number on his pay stub doesn't match his real number? Are you going to call corporate training because he was assigned to a mandatory training program before he starts his job but the one he was assigned to is in Dayton Ohio but you have a family reunion in Florida that weekend so if he could be assigned to the site in Charlotte he could attend the reunion?</p>
<p>I work in corporate HR and all of these are true incidents. When does it end? Life is filled with red tape and stupid nonsense, and the sooner a kid (18or 19-- we're not talking a 6 year old here) learns to navigate the complexity of modern life, the sooner everyone can sit back and breathe a sigh that the world has just accepted another grownup into its midst. We hire smart, talented college grads, many of whom cannot pick up the phone, be put on hold, and then politely try to resolve a paperwork snafu.</p>
<p>And no, the training department didn't give a %^&* about the new employee's family reunion. We run this program 8 times a year; the kid could have joined at any time and done the training then. Didn't mommy approve his start date??</p>
<p>I think going for 9 semesters or having to do in graduate school what you could have done as an undergraduate if you had only planned a little better is something I would like to avoid if possible. I realize she will probably have to graduate school anyway but perhaps she'll go for one year rather than 2.</p>
<p>I know that many kids double and triple major at one of my kids' schools, but I'm still not sure I see the point. Minors can give you an introduction to the field, and probably enough of a basis to go on to further study. And when do you have time for electives..just for fun, things that you just want to try..like the acting course my S took last semester. </p>
<p>And to Blossom...I feel for you! My S is starting his first job and I've had lots of questions about his orientation, flight and hotel arrangements etc. but I would NEVER have considered calling about it myself. He asked me to look at the arrangements and I voiced my questions and concerns to him and he sent the e-mail to the HR person. And some of the questions he told me were stupid (I'm sure they were "mom" type inappropriate questions for a job), and he just dealt with it himself. </p>
<p>We can't help wanting to help and get the answers we think they need, but we have to let them do it themselves...or they never will. Because they won't know how.</p>
<p>blossom,</p>
<p>(Sorry to get this thread off track a little, Amazon, but I can't help but be intrigued by this...)</p>
<p>Aren't the employees MORTIFIED when their moms do this???</p>
<p>I have not read the responses, but I must say that a mother that I know had a student at a very expensive private, well known private school. It was also relatively small. This student could not get into courses that he wanted, or needed for his major freshman year. His advising was much poorer than my son's advising. My son attends a public U. He transfrerred out for sophomore year, but this was not the reason for his transfer. Socially, that school was not a good fit for him. His mother was livid that she spent over 40k, and her son's advising, and assistance in getting into classes was so poor!</p>
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I think going for 9 semesters or having to do in graduate school what you could have done as an undergraduate if you had only planned a little better is something I would like to avoid if possible. I realize she will probably have to graduate school anyway but perhaps she'll go for one year rather than 2.
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<p>What does your daughter think about these things? </p>
<p>Keep in mind, too, that neither grad schoosl nor professional schools care far more about one's academic preparation than one's major. Especially for grad school, kids come from a variety of background. </p>
<p>Please, does she want to smell the roses in college, or just make a mad dash for the exit (sorry, commencement) and the next stage?</p>
<p>FWIW, let me describe my own D, now starting her sr. year in college. Entered with a lot of AP credits. Used them mostly to get out of classes she did not want to take, like physics. Gave up some, like bio, to repeat courses in much more depth. Is a immunology major planning on grad school, but fell in love with Spanish, so is in Bolivia for the summer and plans to minor (maybe major) in Spanish, too. But she found that minoring or majoring in a language is far less important than becoming fluent. She is also taking only the minimum number of courses needed for a major in immuno because as she told me she'll be doing immuno the rest of her life. Now is her time to explore.</p>
<p>She also plans to take a year off after graduation. And please do not think this is because of lack of motivation. She's already won one national undergrad scholarship while in college and will be applying for more.</p>
<p>Amazon, Are you saying you are going to help coordinate her courses for graduate school too? Oh dear.</p>
<p>I agree that for over 40K a year, you should NOT have to fight it every step of the way. For that kind of money, registration should be painless.</p>
<p>One of the "good" things about public is, although there may be glitches along the way, it's so inexpensive that you don't get as stressed out about it. I could care less if my son has to go an extra year or summer session (HE does, though, which is incentive enough for him to take care of these things). After all, he can go FOUR years what it would cost to go to a private LAC for ONE year. If he doesn't fight for his classes, and he ends up going to school for the next six years, no skin off my teeth. :D</p>
<p>Good point Doubleplay. (Post 33) The thing that gets forgotten is that public schools may be spending close to the same amount of money per student (I really don't know) as the private school, it's just that it is "subsidized" by taxes. So, they should offer just as many chances to get into courses and similar advising. In fact, the larger the school the more chances a student might actually have to get into courses. I guess my point is that people at "prestigious, private universities" (OPs words, not mine - I have no idea what prestigious has to do with anything ;) ) should not necessarily expect smoother sailing when it comes to scheduling.</p>
<p>Anyway, Amazon, here's another suggestion-</p>
<p>How about if things don't get worked out, if you do talk to someone in registration, ask them what your daughter needs to do, step by step, to get this settled. That puts them in the position of giving specific directives, which gets them invested and accountable in helping your daughter. If you talk to someone, take their name/s so that your daughter has a contact. Then tell daughter, have her do exactly what they said, and get back with you.</p>
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I think they appreciated that I was doing what they were supposed to be doing
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<p>Wrong, wrong, wrong. They were being polite.</p>
<p>Universities hate parent interference--except in the Bursar's Office and the Development Office. Heck, high schools hate parent interference. I heard one college president lament the fact that he could soon expect parents to call him about his empolyees--such was the insane level of parental helicoptering.</p>
<p>Helicopter around everything on the periphery but stop calling/writing the university unless you are sending a thank you or addressing a crisis. Scheduling problems are not an emergency, btw.</p>
<p>You are treating your daughter like a fifth grader. It's not helpful. It makes her high-maintenance for the next group of people who want to live with her (husband and children).</p>
<p>Re: post #35: that really should be a solution of absolutely last resort.
Any dean would reply that the student would have little trouble if s/he had only one major, like most other students. Trying to shoehorn 3 majors into a schedule devised for one is a little bit like trying to shoehorn size 8 feet into size 6 shoes.</p>
<p>I'm not familiar enough with what's considered reasonable and what's not- I was just addressing the problem of getting, or not getting, into a necessary class.</p>
<p>The three major thingy- again, if that's something someone really wants to do, I defer to what I said earlier, which is to plan on spending a little more time there. That's just me.</p>
<p>Or trying to buy three college educations for the price of one.</p>
<p>Oh, my gosh. Dear Amazon. You must let her do this. </p>
<p>Colleges are set up to work with STUDENTS planning their schedules, and sometimes they aren't finalized until a couple weeks into the semester.
Your role is just to advise and support (with some kids, support is all they want). Let her do the hard thinking. She may come to see that 3 majors isn't feasible, which will enable her to make some choices for herself. Or she may be able to pull it off. Either way, these kinds of decisions and working though problems are a large part of what kids get out of college in the first place.</p>