Help! I think someone has replaced my son with a stepford son

<p>So, younger son, a rising senior, came home from college the other day. Shortly after arriving, he announced that because the best job options for his field (theater) are in big cities, this more than likely will be his last summer home, and he wanted to use his free time to help us around the house.</p>

<p>He announced that since our house was cluttered, he would help in getting rid of excess things. This can't be the son who for 5 years (!) I have been begging to clean out the junk from his bedroom during summer vacation. </p>

<p>I kidded him and said he'd need to make a list, and he then showed me a list he had started making about things to discard, sell, and things to fix. He then started to fix something. </p>

<p>He even cheerfully agreed to help me repaint the accent wall that in a fit of insanity I had painted Pepto Bismo pink last year.</p>

<p>And when early this morning I heard about an opening for a part time job doing some kind of telemarketing (S hates talking on the phone), he immediately got up, updated his resume, and within a couple of hours had left the house for a job interview.</p>

<p>He doesn't seem to have read the memo that kids are supposed to foul the nest before leaving it....</p>

<p>Wow, am I jealous!</p>

<p>Savor the moment, northstarmom, and hope he doesn’t wake from it.
Or maybe it’s you in a dream?</p>

<p>Love the ‘Pepto bismol’ pink reference, we have many of those accidents in our old house.
If he needs a job, he could come to my house to whack my two young adults into line.</p>

<p>Isn’t that wonderful…they really do grow up. I find it interesting to see the changes within my own kids. Having four kids in three years, I can see that each year makes such a difference in how they view the family home. The oldest is the most helpful and my youngest really did’nt know what the brush in the bathroom was for…scary. I am still wondering if she thought the toilet cleaned itself.</p>

<p>Your son sounds like such a sweet kid. It is great when they realize their parents would really appreciate their help. Enjoy the summer with your soon to be college grad!!!</p>

<p>Northstarmom,
That’s wonderful news about the “de-clutterer extraordinaire.”</p>

<p>When my grad student came home on a break he was very upset to see me randomly put a pyrex dish into a kitchen cabinet, paying no attention to the size order of the other baking dishes. “This is how you organize this cabinet?” he asked in a horrified tone. He proceeded to empty out the cabinet and neatly replace all the baking dishes. This from a child who did not clean the bathroom in his first apartment in a YEAR. :rolleyes:</p>

<p>NSM, sounds like a wonderful young man!</p>

<p>My younger son just helped us clean out our garage. He really worked hard this and I was so proud of the effort that he put in to help us. He worked from early in the morning until the job was completed in the evening, and he did not complain once. There was a lot of junk to get rid of, and lots of sporting gear to organize.</p>

<p>Pinch yourself, Northstarmom. Congrats!</p>

<p>Maybe he’d like to come and retile our Pepto Bismal pink bathroom for us? (At least that was some previous owner of the house that wished that on us!)</p>

<p>Anyway congrats, and enjoy it while it lasts!</p>

<p>wow - I am so impressed! This may mean that I have only 4 years until this may possibly, in a perfect world, occur in my home ;)</p>

<p>NSM, can you send him over to my house?</p>

<p>NSM, I’ll take a Stepford over the monsters that mine have been at times, any day, any time. I’ll tell you, I am even more impressed with these smaller LACs than ever. My third one is at a small LAC off of most people’s radars here, and this kid who was so tired of school that he didn’t even want to go has really gotten into academic life to the point that he won a research grant for a project, major award, and scholarship this year. I could not be happier or prouder. </p>

<p>My oldest who went to a tough top 25 national university basically got the academic crap beaten out of him and has really not recovered yet. The idea of picking up a book is repugnant to him. I don’t blame the school. He needed something a lot smaller, more nurturing and that was not it. </p>

<p>Congratulations and cyberhugs from a fellow young adults’ mom.</p>

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<p>Hilarious–and very interesting–Can he come here for a visit? --our 14 yr old needs a wakeup call on attitude, family reponsibility etc…
I might wonder too if he “wants” something, ie, car, money, etc to help get him launched and so he is planning…I know when our student (rising sr in hs) is planning to ask for something, chores and tasks around the house get done quickly and quietly…</p>

<p>Congrats NSM. Does your S have a gf? Would love for him to meet my D, she will be a junior in the fall………….unfortunately, the helping/cleaning bug has not hit her yet.</p>

<p>I must admit, I was also startled that my rising sophomore son came home, took a full time volunteer position and has done every chore asked of him with a good attitude. What’s going on here?</p>

<p>Then again, if he also offered to declutter and clean our house, I would probably pass out from the shock. Or be suspicious that there’s something he needs to tell me (i.e. my girlfriend’s pregnant, I flunked out of school, I’m gay, will you pay for two extra years in school). One can only hope it’s a permanent transition to being a considerate adult and not a temporary anomaly!</p>

<p>He doesn’t have a girlfriend. He also doesn’t have a car. He really needs a car and I notice that although he doesn’t have the money to buy one, he is researching the cost of a car. If he thinks helping around the house will get him a car, I applaud him for dreaming. But H and I are squeezing our nickels to pay for S’s college…</p>

<p>I would videotape him- in case he does what my D used to do and tell us that " we made her do it- she didn’t really want to"
;)</p>

<p>Enjoy it.</p>

<p>My oldest son is one of those lazy gamers who always wanted to have a 2 hour debate about whether it was really HIS turn to do the dishes, mow the lawn, etc. I have found it unpleasant to have him at home during breaks because he is so reluctant to contribute to the smallest household tasks. (Granted, he has worked full-time during the summer). I’ve had the “You are not welcome in my house” talk with him several times. I was really happy when he did not come home last summer. He graduated from college last month and came home.
While he hasn’t found a job jet, he has immediately gotten up and done everything I’ve asked him to do so far without any complaint. “Wow, he really did learn something in college, after all. . .” has crossed my mind. Either that or he knows that we’ll kick him out if he doesn’t “cooperate.”</p>