<p>I'm 18 and a senior in high school. I can never relax enough to feel like socializing. The only way I can feel socially able is if I drink some alcohol (which is hard to get for me and I am running out as of now) in the morning, which gets me mildly tipsy, and then follow it with a red bull. Then, during that high, I can be confident and sociable. Otherwise, I am neurotic, nervous, and depressive. </p>
<p>My life is a little hard. My parents are still in the process of getting a divorce after 4 years, I don't know how I'm going to pay for college, and my dreams of getting into a top school are gone because of bad grades during my first two years of high school. I know I can go to community college/state college, study hard, and then transfer to a decent college/university after two years, but this still stresses me out. And there's the money factor.</p>
<p>Even though I have some woes, I feel like I should still be able to be sociable. I want someone to talk to so bad. I want to go out to parties like the rest of my peers. Anybody have a stressful life but still manages to be social? My next idea is to take up smoking weed to chill me out a little. That costs money though and will create more obstacles for me as I will have to cheat my drug tests for jobs which seems to take a lot of time... </p>
<p>Anyway please read this and give me some advise I am so lonely...</p>
<p>btw I have had friends in the past, but I have lost touch with basically all of them after my freshman year of high school.</p>
<p>If I were you I would just tough it out the next couple months and then focus on making friends once I got to college. There’s really no point in becoming attached to a group of friends for a couple months and then never seeing them again. You can always talk to your school’s guidance counselor(s), as this is something that they are trained to deal with.</p>
<p>I am personally against the use of alcohol and illegal drugs, so my advice would be to stop drinking. If you aren’t social without the usual “buzz”, so what? You will eventually find friends who like you for who you are, not who the alcohol makes you out to be. Sorry that’s a bit cliche, but I think it’s helpful.</p>
<p>I was in a similar position (without the drinking, though) and I found that the best way to deal with it was to talk to someone about what I was going through. It definitely helps to talk and let out your feelings, whether you’re speaking with a counselor or a friend. </p>
<p>I see your point zero, but I seriously don’t feel like I can make it 5 months. I have been in social isolation for about three years. I don’t care about good relationships at this point, I just want some people I can laugh with. I want to connect with another human being. I am in so much emotional and physical pain every single day. It is so hard to maintain. I don’t want to slip and ruin my grades again. I am sensitive and I need to be with other people.</p>
<p>I don’t know how to approach my life to where I can be at school and be sociable. I am fun loving and have a good sense of humor, but I feel like my life is making me to tense too be who I am.</p>
<p>I don’t what it is I am doing wrong. Am I too winy? I try to concentrate on my work/day sometimes and I feel a little better but I get tired and I watch TV or something and then that is when I feel horrible again. I useually feel this constant stress and I can’t get any relief.</p>
<p>1) You posted an essay about how much your life sucks. Nothing too bad, just a little odd…</p>
<p>2) You drink alcohol followed by a red bull in the morning.</p>
<p>In all seriousness, just chill out. Enjoy the fact that your living and healthy. Most importantly, find something inspirational. Even if its stupid like a book or music. I mean you really shouldnt be thinking of getting a job just to smoke weed. And btw, most jobs wont screen you for drugs as most employees/managers smoke anyways.</p>
<p>Well, yes, but I don’t see this as your problem. Can you be more specific about your interactions with your peers in your classes? Is it that you can connect w/ people in classes–like those assigned to be in your lab group–but just never are able to work up the nerve to ask them to hang out? Or does it seem like people you come into contact with at school want absolutely nothing to do with you? Do you eat lunch by yourself?</p>
<p>I really feel for you. Just tell yourself it’ll get better in college.</p>
<p>And if you really need to drink not to feel depressed I think it’s a long, slippery slope that you really don’t want to be on. This is not normal. Perhaps consider some psychological help–talk to a trusted teacher, your school’s counselor, or ask your parents if you can see a shrink. Don’t feel bad about it–it’s normal to need some help as we go through rough patches in our lives. Good luck and don’t lose hope!</p>
<p>Is it possible for you to see a therapist? You could probably get prescribed medication for anxiety from him/her, as well as support.</p>
<p>Changing your diet might help also. Like quit eating refined foods (if you are) and replace them with vegetables and whole grains and good fats (olive oil, eggs) and so on. Depression has got to do with changes in neural networks and dyregulation of hormones (in this case due to you not having friends), which inhibit neurotransmission of dopamine, serotonin, norepinephrine, etc. - all the things that make us happy). It has very real biological effects, some of which can be attenuated by an improved diet.</p>
<p>What nice about changing your diet, is it’s something you can do to help yourself that’s not so stressful. You don’t have to constantly try to interact well with others, and then feel disappointed if you don’t, etc.; instead you can work on the problem from a different angle; and if it works - if it helps you to feel better - then (1) the original problem (not having friends) won’t hurt so much, and (2) you will probably be in a better position to address it.</p>
<p>@quomodo
I have a lot of classes with old friends that I can probably approach if I felt relaxed. I just seem withdrawn to other people I think. I also eat lunch in detention when i don’t even have detention haha. I talk to people there occationally.</p>
<p>i have been trying to get a shrink for a while but my parents have been putting it off for a long time now. i saw a few shrinks two years ago, but both of them wern’t very good. i know there is good ones though. and, my school consoler does not like me and is very hostile towards me. during my sophmore year, i was insulting towards her or something along the lines of that.</p>
<p>I accept rough patches as i have had a life of normal ups and downs untill age 15. this rough patch right now has been 3 years long… And in my youth where I should be having the time of my life. </p>
<p>@121314
i need a job to pay for college, but i want to try to smoke weed to calm me down. if it is true most jobs don’t screen you for drugs, that is great. and, i’ve tried the inspirational thing, but those resolutions/positive thinking keep falling aprart within a week because a new truama or resalization comes along and breaks me. so, i don’t make much progress. but i guess i’ll try the inspirational resolution idea out again. it takes so much energy to build it up and it like breaks my spirit so badly when it gets destroyed by something aha.</p>
<p>@enfieldacademy</p>
<p>i’m on ad/hd pills that my doctor said will help. it is mainly supposed to help with concentration, because i have concentration problems, but it also helps with anxiety.</p>
<p>drinking soda and eating whatever i want actually makes me feel a little better. i still eat moderately healthy overall and take vitamins daily. i was on a strict died for almost a year because i thought that was my problem, but it actually just made me more up tight and wound up.</p>
<p>but ty all for helping me with my problem, i am taking in consideration to what everyone is saying. i know that i’m ranting badly but i’m so sick and tired of being lonely so i’m like pulling all of these stops.</p>