I leave in a week for college and I’m already going crazy with homesickness. Every morning I wake up and I feel like I’ve been hit with a train, and I can’t stop crying. I feel nauseous but I can’t eat. My face is all swollen from crying. I have wanted to move away and go to my college since I was like 14 but now that it’s actually coming I’m so terrified and sad, I don’t want to leave everything I know behind. My parents are on vacation without me, and I won’t see them again until we meet up at my college (which is a 6 hour flight from my hometown). I literally don’t know what to do anymore
Read this thread. You are not alone in feeling this way. It is a very scary transition, you are leaving everything you know behind and starting completely fresh. Who knows what will happen?
Remember why you chose your college. What do you love about it? What are you most excited to do? Any classes you can’t wait to take? Do you want to rush? Think about all the opportunities ahead of you!
Do you have a roommate? I’d try reaching out if so. Maybe they are feeling the way you are. If not, maybe that’ll help you get excited too.
I would try to set up an appointment with your schools counselors Office ASAP. They can give you support and help you feel more “at home”, give you resources to connect to and generally help you with the anxiety and homesickness you may feel.
Remember, many people do not become BFFs with their roommate. That’s ok. Many people do not become BFFs with the first person they meet. Or the tenth. That’s ok too. Your people are out there. Your high school friends won’t forget you. Your parents still love you, they’re still your parents too. It’s ok to be scared and unsure about starting school.
You’ve got this!
Don’t worry that the sadness you feel this week means that you will continue to feel homesick nonstop once you get there. Right now you are still home and realizing that you are coming to the end of your time at home, so it is normal to feel the sadness of the end of that period. You will actually feel better once you are on your campus and start meeting new people and actually having your new adventures. There will be times of homesickness but they will come and go.
I felt the same way last year. I remember feeling horribly jittery the whole 2 weeks leading up to move in, and on the day of I couldn’t eat, I was so nervous. When I got there I was pretty terrified, but I met some cool people and was honest with them about my anxiety. They reciprocated those feelings too. Just know that everyone is terrified. You’re not alone.
I started feeling more like myself once I started class and got into a routine. I spent a lot of that time calling home and my sister, who goes to school across the country. My dad said something to me that really resonated with me, that in moving to college, I’m not losing anything, but instead being given the opportunity to gain something. You have to realize you’re not leaving home permanently. College is a temporary thing, and your home will always be there.
Now after all that, keep in mind my school is only 40 minutes away from where I grew up. I wasn’t far at all, but I was still very anxious. It’s ok to be.
I’m sending all my positive vibes to you. You can do this.
The bark is worse than the bite, I think. Yes, read the thread linked above. You are imagining worst case scenarios and they are highly unlikely to happen. Think of all the hundreds of thousands of kids who have done this before. Most kids really enjoy their college experieince at some point, but understand that it probably won’t happen immediately. Don’t let fear of the unknown dicate your life.
Your parents aren’t home right now, so that probably isn’t helping you stay calm. Keep yourself as busy as possible. Hang out with friends. Clean the house. Babysit. Visit relatives if they are nearby. Hang out with your younger siblings. Stop feeling sorry for yourself too. What an amazing gift you’ve been given. Try being thankful for a wonderful opportuntity, and write your parents a nice thank you note for giving you this gift.Make it about someone else. You are growing up, so it’s time to face this with a little more maturity.
My daughter just started her freshman year Monday. They did break out sessions where they asked kids to stand up if a statement applied to them. The entire room stood up for the questions "Are you missing home? and “Are you anxious about being here?” It’s totally normal and a big adjustment for everyone! Honestly I think there is some benefit going in knowing it’s not going to be a super easy transition. So many kids go off thinking it’s going to be awesome from day one and then struggle with managing the expectations when it’s harder than expected. BUT - you will adjust!