<p>I sent in the deposit for a cheaper uni close to home on my parents' insistance a few weeks ago. But I still can't get over my dream school in California. Last night the dean called me! I feel like I'll constantly be thinking about the left coast and regretting my (parents') decision :(.</p>
<p>Unless that dean was offering you some significant money to attend I would get over the CA school and move forward. You can easily fall in love with the school you will attend, focus on all the details about it and daydream about the campus. Now that you have accepted the offer of admission you will start to get insider information and become involved in the school, making it easy to forget that other one. Good luck, and enjoy.</p>
<p>I was offered a significant scholarship to the school in CA. It definitely would have been financially possible, but my parents thought that I would miss them being so far from home. </p>
<p>I've already paid for housing and a meal plan at the local university. The "insider info" - orientation, e-mail address, class choices - just reminds me of the better thing I'm missing out on. It's not a bad school, but it's hard to forget California when that is what I've been working all four years of HS for.</p>
<p>Try to focus on the school you will attend -- use the school web site to find out more about what sort of housing options you have there, your course options, various clubs and activities. Join in on any facebook or myspace group there is for that school. In other words -- get focused on the university you will attend.</p>
<p>You never know what opportunities will arise at any college. I know, in hindsight, that the best and most memorable experiences at my university were things that I never would have anticipated when applying -- at least one was involvement in life-changing project that didn't even exist at the time. </p>
<p>I know it is hard to let go of a dream -- but that is all it is, a "dream" on which you have projected your highest hopes and expectations. The reality would be sure to be something less perfect and wonderful than you imagined -- it always is.</p>
<p>I don't have a Facebook or Myspace page; it always bugged me how some people judged your popularity by the number of "friends" you had. But maybe I should change my tune - it would be a good way to meet other incoming freshmen :).</p>
<p>To me, what happened feels like more of a freak occurrence than the inevitable: I don't believe dreams are always "just dreams". Most of mine are very reasonable, and I usually attain them. I didn't think CA would be perfect, but I knew that I would be happier there. I worked hard, got a good scholarship, and my family can afford the school. It seemed like everything was in perfect order.</p>
<p>But what's done is done.</p>
<p>Hardtoimpress, I don't have any words of wisdom for you, but my heart goes out to you. I made a very similar choice many years ago, so I know how you feel. Letting go of a dream is very difficult, and it is normal to feel some sadness and, yes, even grief, over what could have been. However, if you truly feel you have made the wrong choice, talk with your parents one last time, and tell them how deeply you feel that you have let something valuable slip away, then see if you can still change your mind with the CA school. A lost deposit is a small price to pay. Hugs to you---</p>
<p>I think the parents thinking you would miss home is a projection of their own fears. I'm sorry. Some parents need to have an "It's not all about us" sign taped on their forehead so that they see it every time they look in the mirror.</p>
<p>What Carolyn said about a lost deposit being small in the scale of things. (Though I note that she and I both let our D's go quite a distance from home.)</p>
<p>I've talked with them quite a bit about this. They've already made me mail the school and decline the scholarship. Both my parents say that if I still want to go to CA, then I can transfer. That is their "compromise". Of course, I probably wouldn't do that for a number of reasons, chiefly for the fact that my scholarship money would be/is already gone!</p>
<p>It's just college. I don't want to ruin the next four years thinking about what could have been, but it's hard not to brood :/. I'm worried especially about when winter rolls around again...it'll be REALLY tough not to think of sunny beaches ;).</p>
<p>You may not get <em>entirely</em> over it ... but as time passes it will fade and take its place beside the many things that could have happened and didn't. I agree with the other posters that you need to move forward, and look at the positive aspects of your local college. If you will be able to emerge without debt, that will make your options for grad school and employment much wider.</p>
<p>Best of luck to you. This is a tough time of year, but I am sure that the fall will bring much excitement and joy!</p>