<p>jlauer95:
What schools are your son deciding between?
Also, your use of the word hubby is super annoying. I know its just your little pet name for him, but still, just say husband!</p>
<p>My time here is over.</p>
<p>My son has just finished reading the most recent posts. (He read the first ones earlier). He's decided to apply to the schools that are not too far away. After reading Sarah's letter, he realized that cold weather is not for him (he loses his jackets too often and said that he'll never know where his gloves are! LOL ). </p>
<p>So..... I think this will all work out :) He'll apply at his choices that are, at most, 300 miles away and at least 125 miles away. After last week's visit to a school 3 hours away, he realizes that his parents won't be doing any "surprise" visits to any school that he chooses. I'm really happy with his new decison not to go 2500 miles away because I think this is what is best for him.</p>
<p>trip sorry for the "super annoying" use of the word "hubby" but that's how he refers to himself - he calls me "wifey" Oh Welll....... </p>
<p>What's the big deal? I don't care what pet names other people call their spouses on this board, such as "dear husband" or "darling hubby" -- As long as its not offensive like b**** or J*** or a****** </p>
<p>You really need to save your annoyances for the big things..... otherwise, you'll wear yourself out. I bet you hate the smileys, too :)</p>
<p>Actually, I dont even know how to do smileys on this site.</p>
<p>:)</p>
<p>Oh dang I did it. Sweet.</p>
<p>God helps those who help themselves :)</p>
<p>Alright back to my first question. What schools is your son thinking about applying to?</p>
<p>Now, he is going to apply to: Vanderbilt, Emory, Duke, and a few safeties.</p>
<p>This way, if and only if he wants to, he can come home for birthdays, minor holidays, etc.</p>
<p>"Sophomoric?" How? Never mind.</p>
<p>jlauer95 , I've learned to respect my elders, so I'll leave it at that, except to say that the way you have and continue to express the situation your son is in is objectionable, IMO.</p>
<p>Good luck to your son.</p>
<p>If you read my son's recent decision then maybe you'll understand a bit more. Sometimes it's hard to get to the "heart of the matter" in as few words as possible on a board like this without having to "cut to the chase" and sound a bit harsh. </p>
<p>My son is very aware of his limitations -- he's brilliant yet he's the absent-minded professor - never knows where his stuff is -- loses EVERYTHING. </p>
<p>But he knows that I love him more than anything - the happiest day of my life was the day he was born. We are so proud of him and his accomplishments, but that doesn't stop us from "pulling our hair out" when he loses every wallet, watch, calculator, pen, pencil, jacket, etc that he has ever had. His mind is always "elsewhere" -- probably figuring out some new math equation or something.</p>
<p>Interesting topic. I'm a senior in high school now and deciding between schools close to home (MA) and ones across the country in LA. I know that if I move to CA, I'll miss my parents more than anything. However, this is my chance to move away, experience new things, and learn to be more independent. Right now I depend on my parents for a lot of things, especially when I'm not feeling my best. They look after me like only family could. Except now, I look at college as an oppertunity to really throw myself into a new situation and basically force myself to learn how to live independently. Sometime you have to do it, right, so why not now? I know it wouldn't be easy if I moved to LA, but I know I <em>can</em> and I really want to to try.</p>
<p>Let your son make his own mistakes, lose his things, and be absent minded. Away from home, he'll learn how to take care of himself pretty quickly. </p>
<p>Just my 2 cents.</p>
<p>I had to convice my parents to allow me to go away further...
I told them that I will be far away later on in life and it is best that I learn what its like earlier than later</p>
<p>I think some people have misunderstood my concern. Either way, my son is going to "go away". (I never wanted him to stay home and go to a nearby college) The choice is to whether go 150-300 miles away OR 2000 miles away. Either way, he'll have the experience of "taking care of himself, losing things, etc.". None of that changes whether the distance is 300 miles away or 2000. </p>
<p>My concern was that he'd go too far (2000) and then regret not being able to come home for his birthday, minor holidays, etc. If he is just a couple hundred miles away, he could come home 4 or 5 times a year, instead of just twice. However, after reading this board, my son has decided to stay within 300 miles.</p>
<p>I'm kind of going through the same thing now. I live in upstate new york, and I'm trying to decide between a college that is about 3 hours away and one that is 12 hours away near Chicago, Illinois. I consider myself to be very organized, good at problem-solving, and really responsible, but I can be really shy and I'm an only child and I'm afraid that I'll miss the close connection I have with my parents, especially my mom. I've always wanted to go away for college, particularly out of state and in a big city since I live in a small town now. I'm just worried that my more introverted personality will cause me problems. I want to become more outgoing and independent, and I don't really think I'm extremely naive or unrealistic about things... but I just wish I would know if I'd be better off staying inside my box or venturing out of my confort zone, or 'safety net'.
I guess the only way to truly find out would be to take the chance, and you can always transfer back closer to home. If you want to transfer farther away that might be more difficult or never happen, and I would hate to be stuck in this same part of ny state all my life.</p>
<p>Cindy, have you discussed with your parents how often you can fly home if you go to the school that is farther away? Possibly, since you are an only child they will welcome the extra expense of flying you home more often than, say, a family with several other kids at home (I know if I just had the one child, I wouldn't mind buying a few extra round-trips so that my child could come home for occasional 3 day weekends, birthday celebration, in addition to the traditional trips home -- Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter/Spring Break. </p>
<p>Since you are responsible and organized, you should be able to handle the "logistics" involved with being on your own. Your only real concern is emotional issue -- missing your parents, especially your mom. If your parents are amenable to flying you home for some extra trips, you may have a workable solution. And.... if you don't mind, perhaps they could fly out to visit you a time or two.</p>
<p>Why don't you look at the school's calendar and see if there are some "extra times" that you could come home if you should feel the need once you are there. </p>
<p>Best of luck..... :)</p>
<p>Transferring isn't as easy as people think...better to make the right decision to start out than try to correct a wrong decision.</p>
<p>I live in CA and am hoping to attend college elsewhere for a variety of reasons. I'm not worried about homesickness, because I spent a month at summer camp each year growing up and I wasn't homesick for a day. It's like I'm missing the homesick bone-- I love my parents, but I love the freedom of being away from my sibling more. They understand that. I'm excited for the challenge of changes (if only to appreciate California, which, at 70 degrees today, was annoyingly warm and everyone wore sandals and skirts). </p>
<p>I don't think it will really matter if I'm in Oregon or Illinois, I'll be a plane ride away. We have cell phones for communication, right?</p>
<p>I live in North Dakota and plan to attend college as far away as possible. Right now, it seems really appealing, but I won't be able to afford to come home more than once, which means I'll spend Thanksgiving and spring breaks alone. That seems fine when I'm here, but I assume I'll be pretty homesick by Christmas.</p>
<p>
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Transferring isn't as easy as people think ....better to make the right decision to start out with then try to correct a wrong decision later.
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</p>
<pre><code>At the time I started this thread that was one of my concerns. My son will likely get some merit $ (he's a likely NMSF) and he has other high stats, so I didn't want him to have to "give up" a scholarship and transfer because his first choice (an impulsive choice) didn't work. Thankfully, since he has read this thread, he realizes that it is probably best that he go to a school that is 125 - 300 miles away. He'll still get to "go away" to school, but he'll be able to come home for birthdays, minor holidays, etc, (if he wants to) in addition to the typical times -- Xmas and Easter/spring break.
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