<p>Of course, he wouldn't be forced to come home for minor events. He might be busy or have social plans. It is nice, though, to have the option.</p>
<p>From my previous post: <<but he'll="" be="" able="" to="" come="" home="" for="" birthdays,="" minor="" holidays,="" etc,="" (if="" he="" wants="" to)="" in="" addition="" the="" typical="" times="" --="" xmas="" and="" easter="" spring="" break="">>>.</but></p>
<p>As I copied above from my previous post --- IF HE WANTS TO. We have no intention of forcing, begging, pressuring him to come home at all. The point is to have the "option", in case he feels the need.</p>
<p>I was just agreeing with you. For my own son, it is comforting to have the choice.</p>
<p>Thanks, some have misunderstood this thread a couple of different ways: some thought that we wanted our son to live at home and go to school locally; and some thought that we wanted him to go away, but to closer school, so that we could expect him to come home more often. We just really wanted him to have the option which he wouldn't have if he went 2000 miles away. thanks again.</p>
<p>I have two friends who both are going to the UP of Michigan for college while I may be going to Northwestern near Chicago. I will in fact be closer to home than they are, but really far from where they are at school. I'm excited to leave home because I grew up in a really small town with nothing to do. I find woodsy places up north offer more to do than little towns like mine. At least up north you can go for nice walks. But going away to a nice suburb like Evanston just outside of Chicago will be a whole new experience for me. I am excited about one other thing: train rides. It will be like Hogwarts for me, taking a train to go home or back to school. I intend on sometimes catching a train on a weekend if I am feeling like crap. Have a nice few hours to spend reading and then visit home for a while before returning the next day. Sounds good to me.</p>
<p>I'm a junior in high school and I've wanted to go away to college since my sophomore year. Every summer, I spend at least half to three-quarters of my time many states away from home and I enjoy it immensely. It also helps that I love the Boston area and have an aunt near there. On the off-chance I get homesick after going away, I could always visit her for comfort. I don't know what your son is like now, but I know that I've always enjoyed doing things independently. I like to travel alone (in terms of transportation) and even prefer to be by myself than to hang out with my friends a lot of the time. I love my parents. I just don't want to rely on them and I really want to break free of my small town. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if your son is pretty independent, like I am, maybe going away won't be a problem</p>
<p>Back in the stone ages, when I left the S.F. Bay Area, having lived here all of my life, for college in Detroit, I loved being away from home and California. But the absolute worst time was Thanksgiving. </p>
<p>No one invited me to go home with them, and I felt like the only person left on campus. I later learned that there were others in the dorm, but we all werel hiding out, too lonely and/or embarrassed to come out of our rooms. </p>
<p>Other than that experience, even though I got homesick for California, I really didn't miss home life which just wasn't very good. I did miss the comfort of Bay Area living and dealt with getting around Detroit. I found the big shopping mall on Eight Mile Road, went to concerts at Cobo Hall, etc., and really liked my dorm mates.</p>
<p>Having a solid group of friends in the dorm and having enough street sense to find my way around Detroit really made being away from California tolerable. But it only lasted Freshman year, as going away to school was too expensive for me, and winter in Detroit was NOT fun! I really missed the people I met, but many of them also transferred out after a year or two.</p>
<p>Jackson-- I feel the same way, and I'm not from a small town. I also have family near most of the places I am applying, randomly enough, which helps for the Thanksgiving problem.</p>
<p>Jackson.... sounds like you have had many experiences with being far away so it shouldn't be a problem for you. </p>
<p>GSP Silicon:; How sad that each dorm doesn't arrange something so that those left behind can't gather somewhere to celebrate.</p>
<p>jlauer-Since he has had strong thoughts of going far away, it may be too soon to completely rule it out. Kids change alot between jr and sr years. He could always apply to a few more distant schools in addition to the ones in your region, just to keep the options open. He doesn't have to decide which ones to apply to for many months, or which one to attend for another year. I wouldn't rule anything out just yet and continue to research schools both near and far. He can then make this decision next spring based on the person he is then.</p>
<p>Also, with the discount airlines, going away doesn't always mean a huge expense to come home. My S2 is at school 1800 miles away and we have found flights home for him for as little as $129r/t.</p>
<p>mwbashful18- the far away school I'm conisdering is Northwestern, too. 12 hours... <em>cringe</em> :)</p>
<p>I went far to college (from San Diego to DC) and I was an extremely independent kid. I lived alone for the last two years of high school (my mom worked two hours away from our house, and was gone for about 6 months total each year). I did not realize how hard it was to completely relocate- logistical issues are difficult, as far as storage, etc. I also only go home twice a year- at Christmas and, at least for my first year, the summer. So I have gone 4+ months without seeing my parents. </p>
<p>I think it is important to distance yourselves from your parents, and your hometown. At some point you have to strike out on your own, and leave your comfort zone. That doesn't necessarily mean moving across the country- in fact, within 300 or so miles would be a nice distance. However, depending on what kind of program your son was interested in, he may be better off moving far away...I had to come East for the education/experience I couldn't have gotten in California, and don't regret a thing (though, I am the youngest of three children, so I do feel bad when I can tell that my dad sounds lonely or sad).</p>
<p>You should just lay down the fact that if he chooses to go far away, he must stay for a year. I almost think it is better to not go home for the shorter breaks...I was afraid if I went home for my first Thanksgiving I wouldn't want to come back. The culture shock and lack of continuity are also things that I didn't think I would experience!</p>
<p>But, over time you get used to not being able to go home...and college is a prime time to explore new places :)</p>
<p>My old history teacher went to his local state college in Mississippi and said that's one of the few things he regrets doing in his life - he had the opportunity to leave home for college and didn't and didn't get to see much of the world until later. He also said he didn't get to see much of the Democratic world until later also : ).The lawyer I interned moved from Texas to Connecticut for college and said he loved doing it and it was a great experience in every way. I can't wait to go to college away from home, wherever it may be, because I don't want to live in this town for the rest of my life and not know anything else.</p>
<p>Ok. I have a few comments about school choice. If your son gets homesick than I'd say private schools/LAC are better to go to. At public schools a lot of students either live at home and commute to campus or if they live on campus they go home for weekends since it is so close. That makes a lot of big public schools rather empty and lonely on nights and weekends. I also think that being far away helps homesickness (which of course will be there.) Let your son go far away and if he doesn't like it he can transfer after a year (and he probably wont want to). I was going to attend USC last year but then got offered a full ride to may state school and because I was feeling a little hesitant about going away I decided at the last minute to go to my state Unniversity (I had already mailed my deposit to the other school too...thats how last minute it was) I have trouble making decisions so I ended up at my state school. My parents thought it was a good thing. They told me to take the scholarship and if I didn't like it I could always transfer later and they thought I would be less homesick (My State school is not super close...I have to fly to it and dorm so I don't come home a lot but more than if I was out of state). I find staying even that close made homesickness worse because I felt like I always counting down unitl the next time I'd see the: Birthday, Thanksgiving, Sisters Birthday, Christmas.... I felt like I wasn't away at college but away for three week vacations and then back home and then back to college for three more weeks... It was the worst possible scenario. I was far enough from home that I felt incredibly homesick but close enough to home that I got to back more frequently than just X-Mas and that made it worse because everytime I got there again I wouldn't want to go back to college. Ultimately I went back but the homesick feeling started to fade. Each time I went home I went back to college homesick again. I think I was feeling more homesick because I knew that if I really needed to go home I could and so I was always thinking about my family and calling everyday. I didn't really feel as though I had truly gone away to college because I knew I could go home if I wanted too and so that idea was always in my head. I would always think about missing home. However, this semester my parents and I have decided to try to get through the semester with fewer visits home. I'm only going back to visit twice this semester (compared to like 8 last semester...) and I think its helping more and I'm definetly less homesick this semester because I'm not seeing them as much. (The more you see them, the harder it gets each time to leave). Next year I'm going away further college but I felt that this was a good adjustment year--I've learned to deal with being homesick this year with help from family and now I'm really ready to leave. I would suggest you send your son far away for college because unless he's living at home he'll still experience homesickness and going to a nearby school (100+ miles) he still will be able to visit you more (which will make it harder on his adjustment because right when he gets used to not needing you then suddenly he has you and wil feel like he needs you again). Regardless of where your son goes, try to avoide seeing him except for Thanksgiving, X-mas, and Spring Break (if he even wants to see u by then!). MAybe one additional visit first semester if her needs it. Pick the school first and then worry about the distance. You'll be homesick anywhere but the further away you are the faster the homesickness goes away (because just seeing you will remind him of what he's missing back home). It's better to let him go away and miss home for awhile but then learn to cope and get on with his university life.</p>
<p>Hey im from England and am about to leave and finish school in a few months time. I would really like to get away from this country and head to America and do college there but, i get easily homesick and to go that far is a big step...what should i do?</p>
<p>I'm a senior in highschool in Ohio, and I'm going to Oklahoma next year...900 miles away. I bet I'll miss my parents and my dog, but they're (not my dog) flying out for one or two football games, and I'll go home for a few weekends, so I should be great.</p>
<p>Brian: I have been looking at the OK info lately and have seen some good stuff about it..... Tell me, why did you choose OK? You do have many other good choices near you.</p>
<p>This is an interesting post. I absolutely hate it here, almost everything (including my family life) and I wouldn't like to see any of the people I know here ever again, for as long as I live. I remember the first time I went away for summer camp, that was the happiest time in my life because I didn't have to constantly listen to any **** being fed to me by nearly everyone.</p>
<p>jlauer: keep in mind that I have very different priorities than many people on this site :)</p>
<p>-like many state schools, OU offers NMFs a full ride (well, very close to that)
-dad/sister went there, dad's family lives in MWC
-I lived in Norman for a few years when I was younger and loved it
-D1 sports, good football and basketball (I love going to games/watching them)
-bigger school teams/opportunities in a small(ish) city, low crime compared to other colleges, people in the southwest are very friendly
-I'm interested in Petroleum Engineering, and OU ranks right behind Stanford in that area.
-the party/music atmosphere in Norman and Okla. City is awesome...I'm not a huge drinker or anything, but I do plan on enjoying myself in college</p>
<p>I think that's pretty much it, hope that helps! I forget if you're a parent or a kid, but if you/your family is looking at OU, I'd definetly recommend it.</p>
<p>Wow...it seems that no one has anything good to say about being closer to home for college--then I'll take up the cause. My dream college was about 1800 miles away from home; I didn't want to leave my family so far behind, but I wasn't willing to give up the perfect-fit college either, so I chose college. I'm not saying that I regret my choice at all, but I would love it if I could go home more often. My older brother went about 250 miles away to school. I call home, and my mom tells me that Mike came home for the weekend just because he felt like it. I wish I could go home for a weekend just because I feel like it. My grandma visited my family last week, and I haven't seen her for months--I would have really liked to go home to see her, but it just isn't financially feasible. It's totally do-able to go thousands of miles away to college, and I wouldn't sacrifice quality or a well-fit environment to avoid it, but I know I would prefer to be closer family. I love school, but I still really look forward to vacations so that I can visit home.</p>
<p>So, to relate back to the OP (even though it seems her situation is pretty much resolved), I think the biggest drawback of going far away to school is not having family close by for comfort as opposed to not having someone to keep you on task as it seemed was her concern with her son. I have every confidence that most students will learn to keep themselves on the right track (perhaps after a rought start) if forced to do so.</p>