<p>OK Im a freshman in college. I usually stay in my dorm and go on my computer. My floor is all guys. Other floors have girls though. I am not too social because Im really shy and am scared of rejection, ergo I dont talk to too many people on my floor and eat alone. The people I am comfortable around, I can talk to pretty easily though.
Anyhow, yeah, I go to classes and also sometimes go to my dorm's lounge or 1st floor lounge to study. Thats the only times I 'go out'. I sometimes meet people in the lounge, but it usually goes like this:
They say "Hi"
I respond "hi" I go back to reading.
What can I do to be more social. I want some friends, and want to meet some girls. But I am really really shy and scared. I am asian with glasses.</p>
<p>"They say “Hi”
I respond “hi” I go back to reading. "</p>
<p>That’s the weak link, chief. You should respond with “hey, how’s it going?” and they’ll say something like ‘good, just cramming for this chem test’ or something like that, you say 'oh haha, i’m just doing homework for this class, what’s your major" and it goes from there.</p>
<p>Obviously if you just say hi and go back to your reading, you’re not gonna make any friends. As for being shy and scared, I know how you feel. All I can say is you just gotta talk. It might be scary but as soon as the words start coming out of your mouth, you suddenly realize it’s fine. The worst thing that’ll happen is the person doesn’t end up talking much beyond courteous pleasantries. Boo hoo, there are 27,000 undergrads at UMD dude, you’re bound to find a few people who you’re compatible with.</p>
<p>Speaking of which, join clubs. Did you go to the first look fair?</p>
<p>DCHurricane has good advice i would listen to them. I bet you know how to make tea, right? Chicks are into that in college. So you can make some tea in the lounge and invite all the chicks there for a tea party. They dig that kind of stuff. </p>
<p>And just cause you have glasses and are asian doesnt matter. I have an indian friend and he wears glasses sometimes. Someone told me in college they dont care what you look like, so maybe its diferent where you go, but they shouldnt be mean like in high school and jr high.</p>
<p>go t o a party and meet agirl and aks qquestions and pretend to leisten to he.</p>
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<p>Then you will have absolutely no social life in college…</p>
<p>Realize that shyness is something that you can change. I used to be very shy --including when I was in college. By following tips about making friends, conversations, etc. I morphed into an adult who can talk to virtually anyone and who has lots of friends.</p>
<p>Join some clubs and volunteer for committees, projects they’re involved in, etc. Getting involved in theater productions-- helping backstage and ushering-- trust me they always need help backstage and on tech --is a wonderful way to meet people. It’s a very welcoming community, and there’s plenty to do.</p>
<p>Spend more time in the lounge and follow DC Hurricane’s advice. Right now what you’re inadvertently doing is telling people you don’t want to talk to them – that’s the message when you just say, “Hi” and then go back to your reading.</p>
<p>Consider taking a ballroom dance course or joining a club that does this. Great way to meet women. You don’t have to be a wonderful dancer to meet lots of women and have lots of fun. Also, there are far more women and gay men who do this, so the women are DELIGHTED to meet straight men who dance. The secret of being a good dancer is to look at your partner like she’s a fabulous dancer. If you do that, she’ll think you are terrific even if you’re bumbling through the steps.</p>
<p>Here are some sites with small talk tips.
[12</a> tips for making small talk - CNN](<a href=“http://articles.cnn.com/2005-03-03/us/small.talk_1_debra-fine-small-talk-conversation?_s=PM:US]12”>http://articles.cnn.com/2005-03-03/us/small.talk_1_debra-fine-small-talk-conversation?_s=PM:US)</p>
<p>[Learn</a> How To Make ‘Small Talk’ - The Early Show - CBS News](<a href=“http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/10/06/earlyshow/leisure/books/main917356.shtml]Learn”>http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/10/06/earlyshow/leisure/books/main917356.shtml)</p>
<p>" go t o a party and meet agirl and aks qquestions and pretend to leisten to he. "</p>
<p>friends don’t let friends post drunk</p>
<p>And yeah learning small talk is excellent. It may feel somewhat forced and even fake at times, but it gets better with practice. Now I don’t even really think about what to say, I just say.</p>
<p>^^ I agree. Also, why not join some clubs or things that you’re interested in? Even academic clubs like “physics club” or “astronomy club” or even the mathletes. It’ll help you to meet people with whom you have things in common, and maybe even some girls who it’s easier to talk to.</p>
<p>It might be scary, but the next time someone says hi to you, try to respond in a way that’ll start up a conversation. Or maybe, when someone else comes into the lounge, you could even try to start conversation yourself.</p>
<p>" I am asian with glasses."</p>
<p>Dude, stop it. Why would you be Asian with glasses? I don’t know what happened to you which made you be this way, but whatever it was get over it quick.</p>
<p>
wow someone on collegeconfidential who knows how to use quotes wow</p>
<p>
Try switching to circle lens. Get the blue/yellow starry ones or rainbow ones or something. I heard guys with circle lens are popular with da girls… grabs their attention you know?</p>
<p>Fake having confidence until you get it…</p>
<p>Okay let me tell you something. I am NO way being stereotypical or racist but if you ever pay attention black men you can learn something. There are plenty of ugly ones who walk around like they are the **** yet they can count on getting a pretty girl. Girls flock to them because of their confidence. Some of these dudes don’t even have a job or in college…</p>
<p>Confidence is key…</p>