<p>So, there is this girl I've known since middle school. For as long as I've known her, she has had this inexplicable vendetta against me. She hates me. Like, she wants me dead. It got worse in high school, to the point that during Sophomore year, she tried to get me expelled by telling the Principal and all of the Vice Principals that I was "bullying" her, despite the fact that I didn't even talk to her and tried my best to stay far away from her. I found out from other people that this was all a ploy, according to her, to keep me from getting scholarships come senior year. Thankfully, though, the principals saw right through her little act and scolded her and didn't reprimand me in the slightest. She repeatedly confronted me in the hallways while people were watching to make a spectacle of me, screaming that she hated me and that I was a cowardice little animal... </p>
<p>Well, Junior year, the scheduling Gods smiled down upon me and I did not have any of the four potential classes I could of had with her. Things went pretty smoothly, aside from the glares she gave me in the hall. </p>
<p>Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for Senior year. I just found out we have AP Calculus together - I don't want to say that I'm scared of her because I really am not, it's just her presence, her glares, her tones, everything about her makes me feel queasy. I am non-confrontational. I'm quiet. I'm usually either pretty distant or pretty friendly, but never menacing. Her "posse" is also in the same class, and I can only imagine the whispers that I'm going to over hear about me... </p>
<p>I've considered putting random, miscellaneous classes into my schedule to try to shift it so that I end up in a different Calc class. I would be ruining my essentially perfect senior year schedule by doing this, however. </p>
<p>I just wanted a happy senior year and her anger and negativity is gonna rub off on me, of that I'm sure. </p>
<p>Thoughts?</p>
<p>By chance are you guys both competing for the #1 spot or a scholarship or something? I can only guess that she is extremely intimidated and threatened by you.</p>
<p>I’ve come to realize that her anger and resentment towards me in the long run is much more harmful to her than it is to me. I noticed that she is usually always angry, very rarely does she laugh and when she does, it seems forced. I know that hating someone to the extent to which she hates me must be so unhealthy and stressful. I almost feel bad. I almost want her to “forgive me” for my apparently repugnant existence just so she can give her blood pressure a break. </p>
<p>For someone who has tried so hard to ruin me, she seems to have a much greater impact on her own happiness than on mine.</p>
<p>@ariistocrat - I am not competing with her, but perhaps she’s competing with me. I generally do a lot better than her in classes and teachers typically like me more than her. She’s well aware of that. I’d say that I have a significantly better academic record than she does, and perhaps that bothers her?</p>
<p>Something a lot more trivial - she’s obsessed with her height. She’s 5’8 and she’s so proud of being tall (why, I don’t know.) There isn’t any girl taller than her in our grade, except me. I’m 5’10. She strikes me as the type that would get really riled up over something like that…</p>
<p>Best to just ignore her. I’ve had girls hate me for even more trivial things than that. If you engage, you lend them some validation and importance. I bet she gets worked up seeing you unbothered by her childish attempts to bully you.</p>
<p>Although, don’t expect it to go away – There have been psychological studies done recently that bullies try harder to get a reaction out of you when you remain unresponsive. But at least you won’t lower yourself to her level?</p>
<p>Don’t switch around your classes for her. You probably won’t be sitting near her during Calculus anyway. Besides, in one year, you’ll be going to college. If that’s the only class you have with her, when the first day of school rolls around, try to find a seat next to somebody else.</p>
<p>Have you confronted her at all about why she hates you?</p>
<p>@ariistocrat - I treat her the same way I treat a perfect stranger. Down the halls, if she glares at me, I glance blankly at her and then divert my attention, just as I would any random passerby. I don’t understand her persistence, after all these years. </p>
<p>@Foodlover001 - Yeah, our Calc teacher is extremely laid back and isn’t a fan of assigned seats or partners, so that won’t be a problem. I’ll sit in the front of the class, that way, I won’t have to accidentally catch her staring at me and I can focus on me maths.</p>
<p>@ariistocrat - Well, in one of her tirades, she claimed that I act superior to everyone around me and that my grades have made me uppity. She also said I was a brown nosing little [expletive] in class when it came to my relationships with teachers.</p>
<p>She’s mad because I’m a nerd, more or less. </p>
<p>I have never had anyone even suggest that I have a superiority complex. Many people have told me that I’m humble, though admitting it isn’t very humble. But yeah.</p>
<p>… I kind of think she’s angry at a mental perception/imagination she has of me, and not the actual me. Her critique of my personality does not fit my actual personality in the slightest.</p>
<p>At least the principles at your school are already aware of this problem.</p>
<p>I had to deal with something similar in middle school. Like you, I just sat at the front of the class and minded my business. Group work was a pain but other than that I think it was better than what I had anticipated. It sucks thinking back on it though because like you, it was a problem I had to deal with even out of that classroom.</p>
<p>@letmeseetheworld - They don’t see her as the aggressor, however. They just think this is all petty girl drama and they wanted her to shut up. But they don’t see the torment that I go through. They just think, “Oh yeah? Those two girls? Catty.” The problem is, I in no way instigate or perpetuate this nonsense.</p>
<p>That’s really sad and sexist they think of actual bullying as “petty girl drama”. Shows how much gender stereotypes are still prevalent in our society. NJ has a zero tolerance policy for bullying and tougher laws are in the works to bring bullying accusations to a state level.</p>
<p>@ariistocrat - Oh, I’m from MA, which actually spearheaded bullying legislation after the suicide of Phoebe Prince. However, since I haven’t claimed to be in any type of distress, they kind of turned a blind eye.</p>
<p>I mean, on the other hand, I’m not too distraught. She isn’t hurting me. I’m happy. I’m a good student, I have friends and a positive outlook on life. She isn’t really doing anything other than making me slightly uncomfortable, not because I fear her, but because the idea of someone hating you so vehemently is enough to throw you off your guard. Its bullying, but its in vain, since she isn’t getting the reaction she wants from me.</p>
<p>Ah, perhaps you could let your Calc teacher know about the dynamics of the situation ahead of time? That way she can be on the lookout for any malicious behavior.</p>
<p>Eh, I doubt that the girl will do anything too obscene in the middle of class. She’s a pretty good student and I don’t think she’d risk her reputation with her teacher or her grade or whatnot just to do something to me. She might glare or sneer, or whisper, but nothing that the teacher could possibly pick up on.</p>
<p>I’d just go with your previous idea of sitting in the front. If you’re in the front, then you can focus all your attention on your Calc teacher. And don’t let her ruin your time in that class. Raise your hand, ask/answer questions, laugh if you want to, smile…whatever it is that you usually do. It’s senior year, even if she keeps stalking you or whatever forget this girl even exist. Either ignore her when she gives you weird looks or smile back at her. For me, it started at the end of 7th grade and continued on into 8th. I literally felt scared whenever I got around those girls and hated coming to school because of this. I’m guessing you’re not scared of her but what I’m trying to say is don’t let her ruin senior year for you.
Sorry, hope I helped.</p>
<p>Wow, I think that was too much</p>
<p>@letmeseetheworld - That’s what I worried about, her putting a damper on my senior year. The big thing with her is that I feel like I have to restrain exactly what you described, (laughing, raising my hand, etc.) But at the same time, if I’m up front, I suppose wouldn’t have to gauge her reaction or see her at all, so I could let down my guard.</p>
<p>It’s tough to say how everything would play out but yeah, I’d suggest staying in the front.
Seriously, good luck and I hope it all turns out good for you.</p>
<p>There is another way to handle this: court action. You know, when someone gets a restraining order; they have to maintain their distance. This way if she even says, “boo” to you, she’s out of there.
I have to view it this way: You’re almost 18. At 18 you are considered an adult and this “nut case” will probably do anything to get you to respond or react. If you do react, it reflects negatively on you because you are now considered an adult and no leeway is given to adults.
My dd had something similar happen to her but not to the extreme case you’ve described.</p>