So during the last few months of school, I had been occasionally talking to this girl at the gym at my community college. We got along great, she was single, and we both seemed super into each other. We would talk semi-often, but our conversations were always just light and fun, meaning I didn’t get a chance to ask for her contact information or even her name. However, she did tell me some of the classes/teachers she was taking this quarter.
The quarter just ended yesterday on Friday, and I am realizing that I may have missed my chance to see her ever again. I was thinking of ways I could somehow see her again, when I thought of emailing one of her professors for a list of their students that quarter. I could then search each name on Facebook until I find her, then message her that way.
So my question to you is this: Would it be illegal for a professor to give up the names of his students like this?
Or is there some sort of privacy clause that doesn’t allow them to divulge this information?
Nope nope nope nope. They will not give it to you and you will look very creepy.
I’m going to be optimistic here…I’ll bet she’ll be back at the gym fall semester…or you could also ask the guy at the front desk…if she’s a regular, sometimes they’ll know.
@bodangles I totally get that it sounds creepy, but maybe I could just leave out the part about finding one specific person in the email and focus on asking for the entire class?
Read reply #1 again. That is the answer.
No, I would not do that. Keep going to the gym at different times if needed next semester to find her, though.
@SouthernHope @intparent These are great suggestions, but the thing is, I’m actually transferring to another school next year, so it’d be kinda odd to just show up at the gym of my old college.
Also, with the quarter having just ended, most students (including the front desk and the girl in question) probably won’t be taking summer classes.
Weirder than asking for the personal information of ~30 people you don’t know??
@bodangles I wouldn’t be asking for their personal information, just their names. Do you still think this would be considered a breach of privacy?
Craigslist missed connection? And yes, the class list is none of your business.
YES. Their names are personal information.
I think we are back to wonder if there are normies on CC.
Do not ask the prof for names. Giving them to you is probably a FERPA violation or similar.
I am female. If I found out a professor had given my name to a random male stranger, I would report that professor. The thought of the stranger then using my name to comb through my FB or other social media makes my skin crawl. Definite no go.
Try the yearbook.
Yearbooks aren’t really a thing at community colleges.
Watch the Seinfeld episode where Jerry gets a girl’s number off of an AIDS Walk registration list to see why this is a bad idea.
In all seriousness, don’t do it. First of all, you have no idea how this girl really feels about you. In your mind it’s all flirty and fun, but in her mind, it might be an incredibly creepy, dangerous, stalker-level invasion of privacy. I know that sounds like an overreaction, but women are constantly forced to be on their guard with things like this. Imagine if she ever found out you did this, and she likely would, the second she asks “how’d you find me?”
There are much easier ways to go about this. You can wait until next quarter to see her again. You can also see if your school has a Facebook group (or “Secrets” or “Crushes” group) and post something like, “this might be a long shot, but to the girl I always talked to on the treadmills at __ gym, I wish I got your name! Are you in this group?” Way less creepy.
Learn from this situation. Most people share at least their first names pretty early in a acquaintanceship. Since you may have lost your chance for a date or closer relationship with this girl, there are probably going to be other girls. Next time ask for that important contact information early on. If she shares it with you, that’s a good sign.
That sounds like a really creepy thing to do. Why didn’t you just asked for her number? ;-;