<p>I dont think UCSD is nerdy per-se, just overshadowed by the crazy partying over at SDSU</p>
<p>I understand your pain, cewillm. I’m in an apartment style dorm, as a freshmen, so automatically I’m not meeting as many people. My three roomies are also freshmen, but totally different than me. They are like, best friends. I talk to them some and don’t feel that awkward but we just don’t “click.” Some little stuff ticks me off, like, I’m the only one that brought any kitchen supplies such as spoons, forks, plates and cups. They consistently use the silverware and rarely wash it. They go shopping for food (I don’t because my mealplan provides me with almost all the food I need, and I have a box or two of cereal if I do get hungry) and buy plastic cups and paper plates, maybe they don’t realize I brought platse and cups? I don’t know…and I don’t think any of them have emptied the trashcan, but they do complain that it’s full. They also go out together all the time to the gym or other places and are always playing video games. </p>
<p>I pretty much sit in my room. 
I got here earlier then them, and wasn’t here whent hey showed up (went to a friend’s wedding in another country) so they met each other before they met me, I think that might have something to do with it. Also like I said, we have almost nothing in common. I like to be respponsible/mature and keep things clean. I like to spend my time setting up a hammock (hung precariously on a door hinge and part of my bed…), reading…I’m not a big partier. I’ve never been very extroverted. Generally I’m very silent, but once you get to know me (or rather, once I get to know you) I’m very talkative. The people tha tknow me think I’m extroverted, the people that don’t think I’m a loner. </p>
<p>As per parties, I really don’t like talking to people I don’t know in a noisy environment. Never have, never will. I don’t see how you get to know people doing that. I’d rather go bike around campus with someone or take a walk…</p>
<p>I have met a few people, which has helped immensely. One guy and myself hit it off in the honors college program, we sat next to each other the first night, then the next week for the next honors meeting thing we played an icebreaker game where we had to find the person with the card that went with ours (each card had one word of a two word prhase, like “icecream” and “Sundae”) and then introduce them to the group after talking for a few minutes. Randomly, he and I had each other’s cards, so I learned more than his name, and it turns out we have some similar interests. After the meeting, our leader (who’s a year or two older than us) invited anyone who wanted to, to go out to eat as a group with her. That guy and one other were the only ones who staid, I wasn’t planning on going but I was putting papers away and was left in the room, so they all thought I was, and I decided I’d go with them. Over dinner it turns out I have even more in common with the guy! But, being a guy myself, there’s no way I’m just gonna email him and ask to hang out. I don’t want anyone thinking I am gay. Still, it’s a friend! </p>
<p>Then after a Tuesday economics class, I saw a classmate in my “group” (20 person honors class, prof put us in teams for some projects) sitting by herself. Next class at the end I asked her if she usually ate alone, and then somehow I ended up eating lunch with her, and two of her friends. I have economics in common with her, and both of her friends were involved in speech and debate in high school, same as me! And she pretty much invited me to eat with them as much as I want, which I will do as long as I think I’m not intruding, because in the last three weeks, that is only the second meal I have not eaten alone. Plus, it works out perfectly because she and I both go to lunch immediately after our 10:30-11:50 macroecon class. </p>
<p>So I kind of know a few people, and thats enough for me for the most part. Some nights I still get a little down and really wish I had someone to talk to, but that’s ok. Because I am decently introverted, all I need are a few friends. </p>
<p>So my advice is try to get to know someone in a class or something, especially if the class is near a meal time, you can casually say something like “hey, where you eating after class” and then ask if you can join them. </p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>"I pretty much sit in my room. "</p>
<p>Get involved in some clubs and other extracurriculars. Many campus activities will be very open to new members now. That’s usually the way to make close friends in college: by getting to know people in ECs that interest you.</p>
<p>It also can be helpful to study at the library or workout at the gym. Sitting alone in your room is lonely and you won’t meet people there.</p>
<p>when i said cal, i meant berkeley. i was doing well until just now, when i dropped a lot of awkwardness across 3 different groups of people, it was ridiculous.</p>
<p>I am very introverted. Most of the time I love being alone. After I go out and party, the next morning I often want zero social interaction.</p>
<p>However, when I do go out, I really try to put myself out there. As long as you are nice and friendly, you should do fine. </p>
<p>Really, I know you don’t like partying, but just going to parties, not drinking, and talking to everyone will improve your social life.</p>
<p>Or don’t go to parties and join some ECs to meet people who are actually worthwhile. Not that there’s not worthwhile people at parties, but it’s harder to seek them out. Especially when alcohol is involved.</p>
<p>PS- Parties suck if you’re not drinking. Personally, drunk people make me really uncomfortable (many friends killed either by drunk drivers or being drunk drivers themselves and my uncle died of liver failure very early in life due to binge drinking) and I get panic attacks when I’m around them. I also can’t drink because I have celiac disease which people are actually a lot less understanding about that when I just told them I didn’t drink. “Oh one little can of beer won’t hurt you”. Yeah, I don’t value my cillia one bit 
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<p>But yeah, ECs are the way to go. People are generally super friendly and even though people can be different from one another, they still all generally get along.</p>
<p>Personally, I love to party every so often (once or twice a month, sometimes more if there’s a holiday like Halloween). But I understand it’s not for everyone. I have met a lot of great people in the two main organizations I’m in, so I would say go for that right now. Also talk to lots of people in your classes (whoever you sit near).</p>
<p>for me back in the day neither parties or organized ECs really worked … they just were not my style (and still aren’t 30 years later). What worked for me in college was taking the lead in starting up an impromto ultimate frisbee game. or touch football game, or card game, or trip to the movies … something about just hanging out (which is what I like to do). The tough part, for me an extremely shy introvert at the time, was taking the step of inviting strangers … but once I did it a couple of times it wasn’t very hard. You’re not asking people to be your best friend for life … you’re asking them to hang out for awhile … and the other freshman will genrally very grateful if someone invites them to join them … eventually you’ll figure out which poeple you really click wih and develop close friendships.</p>
<p>Partying is an overrated way to meet people. Can you strike up a meaningful conversation when everyone around you is drunk and off their rocker? Not really. </p>
<p>I don’t consider myself introverted because I meet people really easily, but there are a select few I really connect with and I spend most of my free time hanging out with them. I would rather have a deep talk with a close friend or spend time with myself than float around making new acquaintances at a party.</p>
<p>My advice, give it some more time. Did school just start for you? If it did, then there is still plenty of time to meet new people. Go to study sessions, work out at a gym somewhere, or get a job. Do anything other than just sit in your room listenning to music. Usually earphones on the ears is a sign saying to not bother me, so that’s probably why people don’t try to socialize with you. And after making an effort to meet new people and things are working out, then transfer. But give it a chance first, school just barely started.</p>
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<p>No, but you can at least hook-up with them to get laid.</p>
<p>The thing people don’t tell you about parties is that, for the most part, people go to parties with people or thrown by people they already know. It’s rare that you’ll go to a party where over half the people there are strangers to each other. Most girls just go to a party with their friends, spend most of the night standing off somewhere talking to each other (as if they don’t do that all the time anyway), maybe dance to one or two songs, and then leave. Oh yeah, and sometimes they drink.</p>
<p>Guys party pretty much the same way, but for us, most of the time it’s about the hook up. So we can’t be at the party. No, we have to <em>work</em> the party. Which sucks.</p>