<p>It's been just 2 days in my college so far. I attend a tier 3-4 school in New York City. I recently met up with this really nice looking and friendly girl who I saw from the freshmen orientation. I attempted to initiate short conversation with her when I saw her twice today because I thought she didn't feel like she wanted to get to know me very well. At the orientation, she was the one who made me feel like I should be her friend and now when I reconsidered it, it's not working for me anymore. </p>
<p>I've also been walking around the campus trying to make new friends and with good people, however, it's been thus complicated. I feel like I am always bored with nothing to do or no one to hang out with when my classes end and I have to wait for my next class too. I am trying to get in contact with one of my friends from High School who goes to the same university as me and he seems to ignore me for most of the things I am trying to ask him on facebook. He feels bored out of his mind when he has nothing to do after class and I tried asking for his celphone number since I feel the same way, but it seems like he doesn't give a damn. I feel like my presence with him should pass on without creating too good of a friendship/relationship.</p>
<p>So far my classes and professors have been going fine, but I don't know how to handle the other hand around. Anybody has advice? Help =/</p>
<p>The key here is that you’ve only been there for two days. I felt mostly bored in college for a full half of my half freshman year just because I hadn’t found any good friends yet. But now, I have a great group of friends. You just need to go out and get involved with clubs and stuff. You never know where you’ll find your new best friends.</p>
<p>Where does the expectation come from that freshmen make friends immediately? Because you are probably the third or fourth person to post here saying it’s been a day or two and the sky is falling (sic) because you haven’t made friends yet. To make actual friends that quickly is just unrealistic, I wonder how everyone gets this idea into their head.</p>
<p>"
It’s been just 2 days in my college so far.'</p>
<p>there’s your problem ;)</p>
<p>Give it a month at least. Go to some club meetings. </p>
<p>Worst comes to worst, transfer to my school. If you started chatting me up after class I’d most certainly respond positively :P</p>
<p>@Ema probably because before college, everyone tells these incoming freshman that they’ll be fine because “everyone’s in the same situation.” IDK, to me that sort of reassurance implies fast-forming friendships or at least acquaintances.</p>
<p>I originally looked forward to it after how I spent a worthwhile time with her, but I guess it’s fanciful for the moment. I don’t know if it’s because everyone’s busy right now.</p>
<p>Thanks DCHurricane, I thought of transferring, but then it’s going to take me a while to decide.</p>
<p>Organizations on campus the first few weeks of school really go all out to get freshman to attend their activities. There’s lots of free food and lots of fellowship opportunities. Pick out some of these that interest you. Even if you don’t feel inclined to later join “said” club, you might find people at them who have similar likes/dislikes, or, at the very least, are doing exactly what you are doing in trying to connect up with people. Also, a lot of dorms have “get together” kind of things, again to promote some comeraderie among residents. Most of the religious groups on campus, i.e. campus crusade, etc – if you are so inclined – also host events. These are done so that you might find a faith-based group, church, synogogue, mosque, whatever … to be your “home away from home.” Good luck!</p>
<p>^And so you’ll learn why dorming, though expensive, can be valuable. But really, join some clubs, hang out on campus, eat lunch in the student union, ask people (male AND female) what their lunch plans are. As a commuter student, the non-commuters aren’t going to see much of you if you don’t put yourself forward. If you want a strong social life on campus, you can’t get into the habit of just going to classes, then going home. A social life takes time.</p>
<p>It seems that two of my friends who I just spoke to aren’t much of a help either. They’re turning the issue into a joke of their own words. </p>
<p>I mean what’s on my mind right now is that I’m already starting to forget this girl who I knew from 7th to 12th grade and it’s not bothering me as much anymore. I feel that a short conversation with a new girl in my college today meant that everyone’s just busy because I really want to become friends with her hopefully. I also lost a friend I made from High School today (he doesn’t want to chill with me on campus when we are both bored as freshmen – like time to forget about him later). So I am indeed in search for friends before I transfer out to a tier 1 school as a Junior.</p>
<p>If start to get involved with extracurricular activities, then I can’t meet this “new girl” from time to time.</p>
<p>Unless you attend an extremely small college, I’m sure there are a lot of other girls there that would be more worth your time than one that doesn’t seem interested. I wouldn’t rule out extracurricular activities without at least attending some meetings and seeing if you are interested in them, and seeing if you can meet anyone else who is also looking for friends.</p>
<p>I don’t know. Based on how I spent my time with her and how she treated me at orientation, she sounded like a person who I would want to be friends with. I felt really shy and diffident. I thought this was my chance to have a nice build-up friendship/relationship with her when I reconsidered it.</p>
<p>You said it has only been two days and that everyone seems to be busy. Things will start to slow down after the first week or two as everyone is getting settled. I would continue to try to build a friendship with her, but be careful that you aren’t coming over as overtly clingy. I’d also start looking in to clubs and such now. If it works out with the girl great, but if not there are always people in clubs looking to be friends with others who share the same interest.</p>