I Feel Stuck

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>Okay, I'm in my second year of college. I like school for the most part, but I'm just feeling so stagnant. I don't have a lot of friends. I've met a few people in college, but it's more of a coming-and-going "hey...bye" type thing. I'm still living at home. I got a job recently, but I work in a mostly older female environment. </p>

<p>I just feel like I'm sleepwalking through life at this point. I feel myself getting more and more motivated to get my degree and possibly go on to grad school, but I don't want to do that and not have any experiences, friends, or fun (which is a relative term, I know) to speak of. </p>

<p>It seems like everyone around me has a life (a job, friends, classes they enjoy, etc) while I'm struggling to figure out who I am, what is my personality, where do I fit in, where do I belong -- hell, if I fit in and if I belong -- and when will my life start to mean something.</p>

<p>I'm thinking about taking out a loan next year and moving on campus, but I really don't want to put myself in any more debt. </p>

<p>I'm pretty sure I want to major in English, but I'm even questioning that. There are a couple of other majors that I'm interested in (Law & Society, Speech, Sociology, Film), but I don't know if I could do any those. All I really have to my name in terms of academic prowess are my writing skills. I don't have a field of expertise or a high interest in one particular thing...maybe it's because I'm a Gemini.</p>

<p>I just feel so lost and confused and bored and tired and scared and lonely and ashamed and resentful and embarrassed. I don't know where I got it in my head that I need to have it together by age 20, but I have and it's hard to shake it off. I'm usually good about diagnosing myself and my fears, but I'm tired of doing that. I just end up in some circuitous, meandering cycle that leaves me even more full of self-doubt and confusion. So I need some help here.</p>

<p>Anybody?</p>

2

<p>Three Ideas: Get involved with research in your department which will require you to to get to know more people , spend more time at school, and get to know your department heads. It may lead to paid internship if you are lucky.</p>

<p>Get a different job. Being a waiter is an awesome job for college age people. You make a lot of money, get to atlk to other workers and hang out after work.</p>

<p>Force yourself to stay on campus with one or two interesting EC's. </p>

<p>In general, get busy, put yourself out there with people your age, do something that you are interested in. You will not have time to think about everyone elses life because you will be so tired from your own. </p>

<p>DO IT....Good Luck:)</p>

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<p>Thanks for your advice</p>

<p>I need some more advice</p>

4

<p>I agree with the idea to get involved in one or two campus ECs. Select ECs that you're genuinely interested in and that take some time, not ECs that meet only once every month. That's the best way to make friends on any college campus. Probably campus activities will be very open to new members at the beginning of the next semester.</p>

<p>The same is true for how to make friends after graduating from college. Often you won't make friends in your work place because people may be much older than you, or you may have a job that doesn't allow much interaction with coworkers. Consequently, having hobbies that help you meet other people will be the way to make friends.</p>

<p>Depending on how much debt you're already carrying, it also might be a good idea to move on campus as it's usually easier to make friends while living on campus. It's also much easier making friends as an undergrad than in grad school, where often students are older, have kids, and are living off campus, and spend all of their time working and studying or being with their kids and spouse, not doing ECs.</p>

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<p>You might just be experiencing what is called the "sophomore slump."
<a href="http://www.muhlenberg.edu/students/counseling/SophomoreSlump.pdf%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.muhlenberg.edu/students/counseling/SophomoreSlump.pdf&lt;/a>
As the posts above me have suggested, get involved, but also, see a counselor and figure out what is keeping you from making those changes. Good luck :)</p>

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<p>I was listening to a job / college counserlor...from Stanford... and he recommends philosophy classes...especially going into Law, Business etc</p>

<p>They are interesting and useful
Living at home can also put a damper on your life, sorry but it does, so try and find places at school to hang out at- coming home later, eating with others, etc is better at this stage than being around mom and dad (as a mom I admit that)</p>

<p>FInd college service organizations that do stuff on weekends- you will meet nmore people and keep busy</p>

<p>Use the school gym or pool or cafeteria</p>

<p>Commuters need to use all of what their college has to mesh with the school</p>

<p>you will get past this...and maybe find another job with younger crowd</p>