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It's tough being a Red Sox fan...
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<p>Yep. Almost as hard as being a Mets fan.</p>
<p>Why? Because both teams SUCK! :D</p>
<p>(I think Spidermom just crossed me off her list of favorites! :D)</p>
<p>Hey one and all...
I constantly play a mental game and I'll share it with you.</p>
<p>We live next to Camp Pendleton and yesterday for mother's day my hubby, my soon to be mid-daughter and me went over to the Oceanside pier for a dinner BBQ at the beach, my all time favorite thing to do.</p>
<p>In Oceanside are 3 basic kinds of people. Now, I am totally overgeneralizing, but stick with me for my mind game.</p>
<p>On one hand are largely Hispanic folk, a mixture of happy families, gang-bangers checking each other out, and the smells of great cooking abound.These people have no interest in things military. </p>
<p>My thoughts about this is: These are some of the people my daughter is willing to risk her life for.</p>
<p>Then there are the huge number of teenagers stuffed into swim suits, with tatoos and piercings on more parts of their bodies than I care to know, but they won't let me NOT know, blaring music , the ever-present cell phone glued to their ears and a basic combination of "California chill-teen defiant" look on their face.</p>
<p>I look at them and think : "my God, our service Academy kids have to DEFEND the likes of these peers!" - and then realize probably every generation feels the same way, so that thought passes.</p>
<p>Thirdly - being in Marine country - we see hundreds of young 20-something men, walking around so conspicuous in their Marine hair cuts - yet on their days off hanging out in jeans at the beach. I look at them and think : in a few years my child will be in authority of these young men - maybe even someone I'm looking at right now!</p>
<p>I actually verbalized that last thought to my daughter as we were driving into our parking spot. She replied: "yeah, I've thought of that and that's sobering."</p>
<p>Then, I'll keep going just to make you all laugh, so we remember that while some people want to start fights on this thread - I want us to be informed of real questions we all have, and finding answers, coupled with a desire for us all to have a really good time doing it...</p>
<p>We're leaving the beach and I notice all these young Marines smoking. Now we're in the car with our windows up, but in my typical 'mom' voice ( look, raising 5 I've got it perfected) I am talking through the window ( unheard of course to anyone except my husband and daughter) : "Hey! You're smoking. You're someone I'm counting on to protect me and have the energy and stamina to do that in a fight to save my life! If you smoke you can't do that as well! You have to stop smoking!" My poor daughter sighs and says : "Moooommmm, he can't hear you!" "I know," I reply, "that's why I'm saying it!"</p>
<p>Then 30 seconds later we're at a red light and to my right on the corner are more smoking Marines, and to our immediate left in the next lane is a Marine in a large truck with his music and woofer on so loud the street is vibrating! I start ranting at him: "Hey! I need you to have good hearing so you can protect me if an enemy is sneaking up on me! You can't possibly hear that if you're blaring your loud music and damaging your ears!"</p>
<p>We go about 2 blocks and stop at a convenience store for something and lo and behold - this loud-truck Marine pulls in too. My wonderful daughter comments: "look mom, there he is, now's your chance". She was teasing, but you never give an ole New Yorker a dare...so I jump out of the car and with a huge smile on my face approach what looked like a 16 year old 5 foot 5 little boy!!!!!!!! I was about to give him my '
mom rant' about the music when I see he also has a cigarette in his hand! Soooooo, I give him my double whammy as we're walking into the store. The poor guy, he's taking my ribbing well and assures me he works in military aviation and he will do fine to protect me! He did say military aviation, so that meant this loud-mouth mom couldn't help herself. So I add: "Hey, my daughter is in the car and she is going to the Naval Academy next month to be a Marine aviator. She will need your ears and lungs someday, you know! And you'd better be nice to her too even if she will be in command over you." The young man smiled and said : "Maam, I'm only in 5 years!" By this time we've gotten our things at the store and are in line so I turn to him and ask him where's he from: Michigan. I ask if he's 19, ( I thought I was being generous) and he told me he was 20. Since he's being so nice to this lunatic that's accosted him as he's just trying to buy himself a drink, I turn on my mom face and ask: "did you call YOUR mother today?" He sheepishly says: "ummm, I did yesterday." "Is that the truth?" I ask..."You know, you're a Marine with the honor, truth, valor stuff...." "Yes, ma'am, I called her yesterday." "Good, for you" I retort! I give him a pat on the back and thank him for his service to our nation and finally leave the poor kid alone.</p>
<p>I get back in the car and my daughter says: "what did you say to him. " So I tell her everything except the part about mentioning her. But my wiley daughter knows me too well. "Did you say ANYTHING about me?" she pries. Well, being one of those people who believes in that honor, truth and valor stuff replied: "yeah, honey, I told him some day you'll be commanding young men like him and that I was proud of his service." Of course she groans and says" mooommmmmm". I know my dear forum friends, I'm incorrigable. What can I say.</p>
<p>So this is for all of us to start our day with a smile on our face, instead of wanting to slug someone.</p>
<p>You sure you don't spell your name "P-E-S-K-Y"? ;)</p>
<p>watch it Z!!!
Yes, I do at times
it's what makes me so charming :-)</p>
<p>whats wrong with tattoos?</p>
<p>wow, tossing out the 'my daughter's going to command you"s?</p>
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wow, tossing out the 'my daughter's going to command you"s?
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<p>You parents listening?</p>
<p>You think I make this **** about over-zealous parents up?</p>
<p>You think I have no right to speak of it because I'm not a parent?</p>
<p>You think you know more about what a Mid thinks than an Alumni does just because your kid is a Mid?</p>
<p>Okay. You keep thinking that.</p>
<p>Peskemom, I love ya dear, but comments like that are NOT helpful AT ALL, and simply perpetuate the stereotype of the Academy graduate. I know you mean well (just like my dad did) but it really backfires and rubs the kids the wrong way.</p>
<p>I now stand by to be told I don't know what I'm talking about (not you, mom). :rolleyes:</p>
<p>ETA: Permit me to add...</p>
<p>You want to do something good for your kid? Show him/her a Soldier, Sailor, Marine, or Airman in uniform, and then ask your kid what THEY plan to do to EARN the respect of that person. When you have a Marine Gunnery Sergeant with three Purple Hearts and a Silver Star standing before you, you realize what caliber of a person YOU have to be to LEAD such a person when you're just a 24-year-old snot-nosed graduate with still-shiny butter bars.</p>
<p>Better yet, have your kid walk up and ASK theose people what THEY look for in a leader. I guarantee they'll give you an answer. LISTEN to them!</p>
<p>Sorry, folks, but this is REALLY important to me! I've BTDT, and I was fortunate to have learned the hard lessons BEFORE getting out in the Fleet. It is SO CRUCIAL for a leader's success that they understand this, especially now when there is a bona-fide WAR going on, and their decisions WILL carry the weight of life and death!</p>
<p>PLEASE LISTEN!</p>
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whats wrong with tattoos?
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<p>If you want to be different, then go out and BE different. Don't just paint yourself to be different.</p>
<p>My $0.02.</p>
<p>Peskemom,</p>
<p>I hope that is a fable.</p>
<p>Ouch Zaphod, I'm hurt. At least it will make for intersting conversation when someone asks which one I am and they say the one with the tattoos. HA!</p>
<p>Hey one and all, this is a true story
And the part about any of our future mids commanding these young Marines is not about domination, not about being arrogant, not about being an a**hole full of pride....Not at all</p>
<p>It's about humility
about realizing the awful weight of command you dare to assume to asire to and recognizing this is no trivial matter.</p>
<p>It's about falling on your knees before your Creator and realizing that you are being asked to step up and take the lives of others in your hands, and you'd better be prepared when that awful moment comes.</p>
<p>It's about recognizing that people the same age as you are going to be looking at YOU, yes YOU and putting their whole trust in your command decisions while you have nothing to go on but the conflicting moments in the heat of the moment and you make your best shot that all your years of training have given you.</p>
<p>It's about realizing that "where MUCH is given, MUCH is required" ( that's a quote from Jesus) and that if something happens really bad, YOU have to take the full weight of the situation and bear it for all.</p>
<p>It's about being reminded that leadership is a burden, yes a BURDEN and to carry that burden with humor, honesty, grace, sensitivity and God-help you, wisdom, love and courage....is what I am praying for all of you young people heading off to serve your country through either ROTC or Service Academy appointments.</p>
<p>THAT'S what my daughter knew by what I said, when I mentioned to her "someday, you'll be in command of young men like this." Please don't think I am being overanxious on the heels of a mom-ego trip. On the contrary - I am sobered, humbled, frightened and amazed at the expections this great nation has, year after year....entrusting billions of dollars worth of equipment and the lives of millions of people, into the hands of young people barely out of their teens.</p>
<p>I guess my sharing in my earlier post today came off so humorously, that this aspect of my deep convictions, and the convictions of my child didn't come across.</p>
<p>I do hope this clarifies the 'thoughts and intents of our hearts.'</p>
<p>i'm sorry, but reading your last post, it was not your daughter's lack of convictions that came across, but your own over-zealousness, as zaphod put it. and it was certainly not those thoughts about leadership and humility. as a mid we're taught the importance of respecting the contributions of enlisted, not picking them out because they happen to be smoking...etc,( it wasn't really clear what his crime was, other than that and loud music) and deciding to somehow work into the conversation that your daughter is going to be a plebe. its a long road to marine aviation from like a month to i-day.</p>
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Ouch Zaphod, I'm hurt. At least it will make for intersting conversation when someone asks which one I am and they say the one with the tattoos. HA!
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<p>LOL.</p>
<p>Dude, I've know great people with tattoos and losers without them. It's just that I don't understand the hype about them among their fans.</p>
<p>No foul here.</p>
<p>You don't walk up to a Marine who puts his life on the line for your safety, admonish him for his behaviors (that are perfectly legal) and then mention how your daugher is going to be "in charge of him", so he better be nice to her.</p>
<p>That's obnoxious and demeaning.</p>
<p>I'll bet that Marine is thinking, "I'm risking my life for people like this". And if your daughter has the attitude of "I'm your officer, bow before me", then she's going to make one heck of a leader.</p>
<p>You're not the one putting your life on the line. You're not the one who's going to be commanding troops. Vicarious excitement can only go so far, and you've taken it way beyond that point.</p>
<p>It's your daughter who's going to USNA, not you. Don't brag for them if they don't you to, and darnit, don't you dare have a holier than thou attitude with the enlisted.</p>
<p>Be humble. (Jesus said that, too)</p>
<p>I get ya, Peskemom. Sounds exactly like something I'd do (to Spider's endless mortification). No attitude implied, just "how do you plan to be worthy of the people you will lead and serve?" I imagine midshipmen spend four years asking themselves that question, I just started asking Spider a few years early. :)</p>
<p>Z, I would never cross you off my list! I have, however, been known to destroy my immediate surroundings following a bad Sox loss (think Bucky effing Dent). You've been forewarned.</p>
<p>Nuke, ease up. It's a mom thing. Just teasing the young man a bit, paying attention to him, joshing him in a mom-ish way about taking care of himself. No big. We women of a certain age sometimes do this. We're harmless. :)</p>
<p>Spidermom:</p>
<p>Joshing him about smoking and listening to loud music is one thing, and understandable coming from a mom. But telling him to "be nice to my daughter even if she will be in command of" the Marine is crossing the line by leaps and bounds.</p>
<p>I can only imagine what the Marine was thinking...</p>
<p>I almost forgot why I tend to lurk rather than contribute to this board the past couple months. One thing I know our firsties drilled into us, if not the first day, that first week was to get over ourselves. Even now as we are about depart for our summer trainings in the fleet they over emphasize how much more experience the petty officers and chiefs have. It takes are real nuthead to get cocky about going to a service academy in their presense. Once you become an Ensign or 2nd LT they are the ones training you. They tell you all about the ship, how to do things, and all the information you need to do your job. So one day they will have to salute me, but I could not survive being a junior officer if it weren't for their leadership and command over me.</p>
<p>Hey one and all, I appreciate all the feedback from all sides of thought on this. Spidermom, you understand me, and yep, it's a mom thing. But it's REALLY helpful to hear dmeix and others weighing in, too. I'm willing to hear I'm the idiot. But I do think this young Marine just thought I was a typical crazy mom acting like a crazy mom on mother's day....and all my comments were made laughing,with a big smile and my face,...he was smiling and laughing back... and my parting comments were a genuine pat on the back with a hearty: "Thank you so much for serving our country." So I don't think the guy felt I was demeaning him in the least. But how do I know? Nuke and dmeix are speaking for the other side. Thanks for telling me like it is all of you! And Z...you're being so p-a-t-i-e-n-t with me on this one. Thanks for not ranting, even if I deserve it. I love ya for it. :-)</p>
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just "how do you plan to be worthy of the people you will lead and serve?" I imagine midshipmen spend four years asking themselves that question.
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<p>I hope I'm wrong, but you'd be surprised. In my day, not a whole lot of emphasis was placed on that. I really hope they've seen the light since then. I know they brought in senior enlisted in 1993 or 1994, which was a great start, though.</p>
<p>And to echo usna_reject, your troops will make you or break you. They can get along without you, but you cannot get along without them. You don't have to play Mr. Nice Guy, either. Just be fair and LEAD them, and you'll go far.</p>
<p>There is a difference between having authority and being a leader. Authority can be granted. Leadership is earned.</p>