<p>I love my friends and some of my classes...but the rest of the environment (the deans, half of the professors) seem to enjoy making life difficult. At the moment I have just almost recovered from a serious illness that caused me to miss more than 3 weeks of class. Regardless of my doctor and hospital notes, one of my classes will not allow me to make up the test, and the teacher says that I should just withdraw instead of trying to do the rest of the work, since there is a policy for no extensions and no make up exams, regardless of the circumstances. My dean said I should just accept a W on my transcript and move on. </p>
<p>Is it different anywhere else, or does college just suck with these things in general? Or am I completely overreacting? It's possible since my head is still cloudy. I'm just wondering if there is any place where they actually try to help students through difficulties, rather than encouraging them to quit.</p>
<p>Honestly, I feel like this would be a great place if I were perfect, and nothing bad ever happened...but I couldn't forsee getting so sick. I don't understand why they allow freshman to drop this class for another 2 weeks without consequences, but they can't make that allowance for someone who was so sick and had no other options.</p>
<p>That does seem harsh. Is there another Dean or adult that you could reach out to? What about the department head of the department for this course where you were told you could not make up the class? Can one of your parents assist you with this, given the severity and length of your illness? If you don’t want to withdraw from a class, you should not be forced to given these circumstances. It sounds like you need some adults to help with this. Best of luck with this and I wish you a full recovery.</p>
No, not all colleges are like that (and I also agree with hasmom that you shouldn’t just accept the instructor’s response - you should definitely inquire elsewhere). My daughter got very sick her first semester, and Kenyon was very understanding and accomodating.
You sound really down. Please check back in with the physician who treated you and/or Tufts mental health service. And please follow up, either here or privately to me, and let me know how you’re doing.</p>
<p>Try to focus on getting better. Being sick for three weeks must have been so difficult for you and I am sure that you must be very exhausted and overwhelmed. Although a W may seem terrible (even if it is not fair), in reality it is fine and your health is far more important than a transcript. I agree with the other posters in that you may need to get more help from someone other than the professor. Unfortunately, not all people can understand the impact that a three week illness can have on you. Good luck and please let us know how you’re doing!</p>
<p>I think you should take the advice of the prof and dean about taking the W in that class. Apparently the prof believes missing 3 weeks of his class is too much and will not allow you to pass the class doing make up work on your own. The prof sets the rules for his classes. Get well and take it next semester.</p>
<p>My son at Tufts had mono last year. His professors were very understanding, and he did get some reasonable extensions and breaks. His problem was being impatient and rushing back into things and not taking care of himself. Don’t make that mistake – your health comes first! Could you talk to the Dean of Academic Affairs (or someone in that office)? Just a thought – it might give you more to work with than dealing piecemeal with various professors.</p>
<p>It sounds like part of your concern comes not just from having to withdraw but from having the ‘W’ show up on your transcript. Is it possible that this is just a misunderstanding of what a W means?</p>
<p>When I was considering taking a W just before Thanksgiving my junior year I was concerned about the same thing until everyone who I trusted to know about these things told me that fretting about a single W wasn’t worth my time, and if I wanted to drop, I should just drop. I know that choosing to withdraw is a very different circumstance than being told to withdraw, but withdrawing in either circumstance doesn’t carry a stigma. </p>
<p>It’s possible that part of the reason the dean and professor are encouraging you to take the W is because it’s simply the easiest and least detrimental solution to the problem of missing three weeks of class. Your other classes have worked with you, so loosing the credit from one class likely (hopefully) won’t set you back for graduation, nor should it affect grad school or job applications, and you (again, hopefully) will have more time to do the catch up work and breath a little freer. </p>
<p>In high school, a W is often an indication of something pretty horrific in a high school transcript. It nearly always comes from truly extenuating academic or life circumstances and carries a fair amount of meaning. From my own experience and from conversations with a number of profs, Deans, and HR people - a W in college (unless it’s part of a pattern) isn’t something anyone will care about later on down the road.</p>
<p>I apologize if I’m overstepping my bounds here, but as someone with an actual W on his transcript (who had forgotten about it until this thread), I want to offer a perspective on how little it will end up meaning.</p>
<p>I love <a href=“mailto:DanAdmiss@Tufts”>DanAdmiss@Tufts</a>. He is a real gift to this forum both students and parents.</p>
<p>And I agree that a W in college is far less meaningful than one in HS, especially so early in the process. Put in perspective, last year I knew five kids who ended up with mono as freshman in college. All but one ended up dropping a class. Not sure if they were done before they would be official “W’s” but one class does not a career make or break.</p>
<p>Sorry for posting and then disappearing, we lost internet in my apartment and I haven’t been well enough to head to the library until today. I am downloading some stuff to do from home but I wanted to write back. You have all posted very helpful messages and I am very grateful.</p>
<p>I think I am partly upset because I am still sick and it’s driving me slightly crazy because it’s so painful. And I’m trying to get back to things, but I missed so much, and then not only do I have to withdraw from my favorite class, but it’s going to be a W on my record, and I think that is going to look really bad when I apply to grad school. Especially since I am now only taking 3 classes, and I’m probably going to have incompletes in 1 or 2 of them. </p>
<p>I am hoping that all my feelings about this are just amplified because I am sick, and when I recover I will feel better. But at the moment I am just feeling like this is messing everything up. And every time I have to talk to someone about it they are like “Oh, you shouldn’t get a W for that” but I can’t help it…if I didn’t get sick I would have been able to do everything fine…</p>
<p>But seriously, thank you so much for all your posts and for letting me vent. I’m kind of ashamed of my first message but I was just feeling very upset about all this.</p>
<p>DanAdmiss@Tufts I don’t think you overstepping, I was kind of thinking this W was going to be the end of my grad school hopes…but maybe that’s not true.</p>
<p>If you’re still a little sick while trying to catch up, the W is probably a good thing, actually. It won’t hurt you for grad school, and it’ll free your time so that you might not need to spend all of winter break doing this semester’s work. And as I understand it from my friends that went through similar(ish) hiccups, the incompletes need only be temporary and are converted into full grades once you’re caught up. </p>
<p>One W will not impact on your grad school applications. A pattern of W across multiple semesters is different, and would be bad, but one withdraw on your first semester of college won’t set you back and ABSOLUTELY is not the end of your grad school hopes. A bad grade is far, far worse. Think of this as an opportunity to have a little extra time to put your life/health/happiness back together. </p>
<p>If it’ll help, come find me in Bendetson. We can chat about the meaning of all this and how to put the semester back together. And if you’re still really worried, we can work together to find someone at Tufts who does graduate admissions in a field close to yours and you can ask them about the W’s impact. I think you’ll find you’ve got nothing to worry about beyond the already taxing process of catching up. Take the W, not because you have no choice in the matter, but because that’s the best way to put yourself in a strong position for graduate school. Your GPA matters, and fewer classes at this point will mean stronger grades and less long term impact on your transcript.</p>
<p>“A pattern of W across multiple semesters is different, and would be bad, but one withdraw on your first semester of college won’t set you back and ABSOLUTELY is not the end of your grad school hopes. A bad grade is far, far worse.” “Take the W, not because you have no choice in the matter, but because that’s the best way to put yourself in a strong position for graduate school. Your GPA matters, and fewer classes at this point will mean stronger grades and less long term impact on your transcript.”</p>
<p>Dan-- Sickness is sickness and there are many kids that get diagnosed with a chronic illness in college or have more than one semester of illness. They are not penalized in grad school admissions if they have a series of W’s across multiple semesters and it can be explained. Believe it or not, there are also many people who get into competitive grad schools with several bad grades. Undergrad looks for perfection, but grad schools are more flexible and really look at the candidate. I feel sorry for the poster who is viewing everything in such high stakes terms. His/her single goal should be to get better. Learning should be pleasurable by the time college arrives and the treadmill of the “future” should be slowed down. The original poster has a set-back and an opportunity to learn that life goes on. Although your advice is kind, I do think that it is feeding a bit into the high stakes frenzy over admissions.</p>
<p>I would be fine taking a W if I was choosing to withdraw, but if I have no other choice ONLY because I am sick, I don’t understand why it has to be marked on my transcript like any other kid who chooses a W over a bad grade.</p>
<p>I really do appreciate you all taking the time to write these thoughtful comments. At the moment I am finding it difficult to have perspective on the situation, but I did read all of them, quite a few times, and I am trying to keep it all in mind.</p>
<p>Okay, I don’t see any way to edit my previous post, though I would like to. I promise I am really not so whiny normally, I’m actually kind of annoying myself. I probably should not have written that title either. The fact that I am still sick is driving me absolutely nuts, all I really want right now is to take a break and focus on recovering, but there are only 2 weeks left in the semester. I have finals coming up and papers to write and I’m still behind. </p>
<p>I’ve been sick almost all semester, they kept putting me on stronger antibiotics, so it would be better for a while, but then it would just get bad again. But it was only so awful that I couldn’t function for about a month. I hate when I can’t go to class or even study, let alone do any of my activities. Now I’m getting better but I am so stressed. I feel like I basically lost an entire semester, and even though most of my teachers are really helping me catch up there are some things you can just learn so much better when you get to participate in class. I wish I could just get healthy and then do this semester over (obviously not possible). I’ve never been this sick for this long, and it’s making me feel really overwhelmed. I don’t like feeling like I am doing the work just to get it done, which I know is what I have to do now. Normally I like to be able to process and enjoy what I am learning, not just do it for credit. </p>
<p>I just really wanted to have a good semester and I am so disappointed. I don’t want to be sick anymore…Anyone have a magic wand?</p>
<p>I hope you are feeling better too. There is no magic wand, but continue to take care of yourself and don’t over do things while catching up on your work. You need to keep getting better. In a few weeks you’ll have a nice break and get to really regroup. Just take things one day at a time.</p>
<p>I think that you should take up Dan’s (the admissions guy who posted) offer of having him help you out. You sound depressed, and, possibly, unfairly treated regarding this issue. I don’t know all the details, of course. But, if nothing else, Tufts is supposed to be so accessible to and nurturing of its students. Go see Dan!</p>