I NEED feedback/grading on this essay.

<p>So...the October SAT is coming up, and I'm getting nervous. Last time I wrote my SAT I got a 6/12 on the essay :\ and I still took 30 minutes to write this one.</p>

<p>Prompt: Is perfection something to be admired or sought after?</p>

<p>Is human life perfect? Most people would say no. Would most people want it to be perfect? Of course, everyone would. As people find ways to improve humanity's quality of life, they are applied as soon as possible. Science, entertainment and virtually every other industry aims to be flawless in its execution.</p>

<p>Think about how countries such as Russia and the United States managed to reach the moon. Organizations such as NASA have worked to create aircrafts that can support people in space. Within these mechanical beings are modules, developed by many different people, that need to work correctly for the aircrafts to successfully launch. If a launch fails, the passengers may die - a horrifying predicament - and without extremely careful planning, this would occur. So many things can go wrong in the extremely cold, air-devoid abyssal wasteland. Precise calculations after calculations are necessary for a spacecraft to be designed for a safe, reliable excursion to the moon. A single mistake, such as incorrectly calculating the position of the moon at the time of the spacecraft's arrival, can result in complete devastation. Yet, all of these difficulties have been accounted for.</p>

<p>Meanwhile in the entertainment industry, it is a survival of the fittest. For example, many strips in the newspaper comics industry have lasted for years or decades. As these strips have progressed, they have also gradually improved by the producers' careful attention to readers' desires. Now, this enormous amount of experience that these elderly comics have, from improving from their past mistakes and years of learning what readers want, would give a very slim chance for a new comic to become competitive. These new comics would have to certainly be careful, and the artists would have to spend all of their time generating ideas, finding the best ideas for strips, and deliberately placing every single line and color in each panel of their strips. An example of one such daring artist is Bill Watterson, who developed, in my opinion, a masterpiece, known as Calvin and Hobbes. This strip, emerging in a time when strips were hard to make the newspaper, captivated a myriad of fans in the United States, as well as all over the world.</p>

<p>Clearly, aiming for perfection is a good thing. In just about every industry, the absence of flaws is rewarded. Furthermore, this is a driving force for human productivity in developing a brighter future.</p>

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<p>So...this essay uses industry as an example to illustrate my argument. I feel that my arguments are stronger when I don't base them on stories, but general subjects instead, as they are more palpable to people and I can provide my own analysis on them. What do you think?</p>