<p>I have friends that love me, I have a boyfriend that says he loves me and I have a family that's forced to love me. I'm a sophomore in college and have a 3.0 GPA. I feel smothered by my boyfriend of 4 years but I can't seem to break up with him. He's living with me and lying to his parents about being in college. Everyday I just see him do nothing with his life and it makes me really mad. I have to pay for everything. I pay for the roof over our heads, I pay for our food, and sooner or later I'll be paying for the clothes on his back. Aside from that I drive him to where he needs(more like wants) to go. Freshman year I was the happy girl that looked pretty, but I don't know what happen. I just think about killing myself everyday. I'm to a point where I don't know where to go or who to talk to.</p>
<p>Please go to your student health center and ask for help. They will have counselors you can talk to. Don’t put it off! You would be surprised how many students struggle, so you’re not alone.</p>
<p>Dump your boyfriend ASAP.</p>
<p>Please go to your counseling center as soon as you can. They are there to help students like you. You don’t seem to be in a healthy relationship, and becoming depressed is the sign that it’s not. It’s possible that you are in an abusive relationship- not one where you are being physically hurt, but emotionally. He’s draining you financially as well. You started dating him at a very young age when perhaps you did not know who you were chosing, but I think you know now that he’s not good for you.
A counselor will help you figure out what you need to do to get your self esteem back and make some healthy choices for you- and healthy dating relationships- not just for now but in the future.</p>
<p>I would say that probably the counseling center is a good place to start. Yeah, it’s a bit of an overused line, but they can at least get you started in building back up your life–they’re also good at what they do. And unless you really see yourself with this guy for the future, I would start thinking about ways to break up–although, I know it’s hard since he’s living with you and he’s been your BFF for 4 years…but it’s got to happen some time…as for suicidal thoughts, I would assume that you still have a LOT to live for (although the same probably can’t be said for your boyfriend) even though you might not be able to see that at this point. And when I mean a lot to live for, I mean you have a life of doing what you love, making others lives better, enjoying friendships and families ahead of you. Yeah, being in despair and depression can drain your life away, but that’s not the end of the story.</p>
<p>Yes, please take all the above advice and go seek help immediately… you are not alone and there are people who are willing and ready to help you.</p>
<p>It’s not just the boyfriend, although that’s a big one. It’s the toll it has taken on your self esteem, and the kind of relationship where you are basically taking care of him. You’re the one in the better place academically and financially- but he is controlling you.
Counseling will help you see the pattern in this kind of relationship. If your family is also abusive or uncaring in some way, then this plays a part in it to. Counseling can help you see this differently so that you can choose to be in a healthier relationship one day. For now, you need to heal and recover.
Please seek good professional help with this difficult situation. </p>
<p>When you are depressed, everything looks bleaker, but you are young, intelligent, and there is hope and a better future for you. Please seek help.</p>
<p>You really need to go to a counselor. I was diagnosed with Depression years ago and it’s been a battle to say the least. BUT with help, it gets so much better. </p>
<p>With regards to your boyfriend, I know it’s hard, but you need to get that negativity out of your life. If you need help, there are resources. Depending on what state you’re in, 211 is an excellent resource.</p>
<p>Sounds like you’re already making or have made some decisions to move on with your life for the better minus boyfriend but need the support to follow through. And yes, it’s depressing and you’re depressed–but who wouldn’t be? It’s tough emotionally. And you need a plan to extricate yourself from the situation.
One step at a time. You’ve already listed all the reasons to release yourself from this relationship and they’re all good. So no what-if’s, he’ll improve etc. hypothesis need be involved. He may be good for someone else (so they can have him!) but not for you. You don’t need counseling to stay in the relationship–you need counseling to get out gracefully if that’s even possible. You’ll do better imagining yourself beyond this relationship–free and clear to be that happy girl again. Keep your goal in mind at all times and make your plan. And it doesn’t have to be any long, drawn-out process either.</p>