<p>I hope things get happier for your son, GMT. </p>
<p>@GMT: Thank you for being so candid about the experience your son is having. This board is often full of the brighter sides of BS and we donāt often get to see a more well-rounded version of the schools. I too hope that things get better for your son.</p>
<p>I do wonder what you mean by the social pressure being intense. What is the definition of social pressure in this instance? Is it a case of the āalphaā or athletic boys dominating the culture? Or is it more everyone at school feeling as if they have to keep up with each other in terms of clothing, trips, weekend activities, etc.? I also wonder about the students that leave involuntarily. Is it generally for academic reasons or is it more the result of breaking school rules? </p>
<p>I ask because we arenāt that familiar with boarding school culture. Being first year parents and so far from the school causes us to worry about these things a great deal. </p>
<p>Again, thank you for being upfront about some of the struggles the students and families encounter when embarking on this path. It is very helpful and most appreciated.</p>
<p>GMT, I hope things work out for the best for your son. Iām sure he is doing a great job in difficult circumstances. And Iām sure that when he gets to college, he will be able to find an environment that works for him - as my dad said (when I thought I was flunking a course) āitās never the last train out of the stationā. </p>
<p>@GMTplus7 - My heart is saddened hearing the story of your sonās experience, and I wonder how many of the kids who are all <em>starry-eyed</em> about the acronym schools will be faced with similar situations if they get in. Was it you who said on another post, āBe careful what you wish for?ā This is a great reason why we chose the small prep school we did as opposed to some of the more prestigious BS in our vicinity. We knew that the other schools, while amazing in so many ways, just werenāt right for Moosieboy. He felt completely āat homeā at the one school, and so did we as a family. I think itās SO hard for many students (and parents, I wager) to get past the āglamourā of the acronym schools long enough to truly see if itās the right fit. Kudos to you and your family for doing things differently this time around!</p>
<p>If I could do it all over again (which I actually might), Iād apply to more schools. Or just different schools. </p>
<p>Stargirl, when you apply again, I suggest applying to a few schools outside new england.</p>
<p>@neatoburrito I applied to SAS and Cate too! How many is a few?</p>
<p>Although neato didnāt say it directly, perhaps she thought you should look into Mercersburg. We have four very different personalities and perspectives in our family, and we all loved it. But it may be too far and too difficult to get to. </p>
<p>@twinsmama Good point! If I apply again Iāll give it a look!</p>
<p>My mistake was not meeting with Spanish and English department headsāmy two strongest subjects.</p>
<p>In a heart beat, do it again. The first time my d applied she was not accepted, (long story). Applied again, accepted many places, loved the experience, great college. Each day as she reflected upon her experience, she misses it more.</p>
<p>@stargirl3: would you consider all-girls? Like Dana Hall/Emma Willard/etc?</p>
<p>@london203 I applied to (and was rejected from) Emma Willard. I wasnāt wild about Dana Hall, but Iām willing to look at Miss Porterās or Madeira.</p>
<p>@stargirl3 I think Dana is a great school. But I totally get that the high number of day students is off putting. My own child wasnāt interested in that school. It IS a competitive school academically with lots of opportunities for girls who want to be involved. I think it is a hidden gem that is worthy of a look. But, since you said you would be a day student, that doesnāt address your desire to board at school, now does it! 
I do think it is worth a second look IMHOā¦maybe you could board! LOL</p>
<p>I donāt know a ton about Madeira other than it is a āhorseyā schoolā¦ and I think Porterās is of similar ilk to Dana (other than the day to boarding ratio)ā¦ but it is well respected. I was just brainstorming and thought that maybe girls schools have more flexibility re: FA since the fact that they are single-sex must affect the numbers of people willing to apply. I also think that accounts for the high acceptance percentage (not that any are easy to get into, just that the pool of applicants is self-limiting). </p>
<p>@london203 Letās cross that road when we get there! September 1 and I shall inquire at schools, yes? :)</p>
<p>(If you know me, you know that I want to go to Wellesley College. Dana Hall was founded by the same guy shortly after he founded Wellesley because he thought the ladies needed somewhere to go before.)</p>
<p>Stargirl: as I understand it, you are looking for full financial aid. This will kneecap anyone in the admissions process. I think you yourself ā with more wisdom on the subject than most on this board ā have seen the truth of this. Applying more broadly, as has been recommended, wonāt cure those inalienable circumstances.</p>
<p>@makennacompton True. Definitely true. Iām just worrying about waitlists now, and Iāll re-visit (haha) this whole application thingymagiggy when (if?) I get bad news.</p>
<p>If I could do it all over again, I would have DS shadow current students for a WHOLE day prio to the revisit day. Revisit days are nice, donāt get me wrong, but everyone at the school is on their best behavior and super friendly on revisit day. Iād like for my DS to see the school on a day where everyone isnāt trying to impress.</p>
<p>Maybeā¦ I have to say, though, my son was pretty tense on revisit day and actually thought ārealā school was friendlier and more comfortable when he first started as a real student this year. Maybe it depends on the kid, but he didnāt feel like the regular days were disappointing in any way (compared to revisit day) and, like I said, he thought people were actually friendlier when he was actually a student there (although, again, they may just speak to the fact that he was tense at revisit day-- and kind of ASSUMED it wasnāt going to be a very friendly place).</p>
<p>We visited 7 schools, which added up to a small FORTUNE in intāl airfare, rental car, hotels, meals & expenses, not to mention considerable time off from work & school, a lot of emotional stress and the aggravation of driving thru gridlocked traffic to get past NYC. I can still hear echoes of āare we there yet?ā. S2 forgot to pack his blazer, so we had to buy an emergency one. Add that to the tally.</p>
<p>It figures that in the end S2 chose the 1st school we visited, and it has a casual dress codeā¦ 8-} </p>