I'll grade your essay... if you grade mine.

<p>The title sums up my deal in this thread. Please evaluate my essay on a scale of 2-12.</p>

<p>Prompt: Do small decisions often have major consequences?</p>

<p>Even the smallest things in life can have the biggest importance. Oftentimes we neglect the "little things" in life and only analyze the big picture. While this in itself is important, it is also necessary to consider the small components in every situation. Therefore, small decisions do have major consequences. This is witnessed in the true life story of Liz Murray, as well as popular modern dieting.</p>

<p>A recent graduate of Harvard University, Liz Murray is not exactly your typical privileged scholar. While growing up in the slums of the Bronx, Liz found herself caught in a depressing situation; her mother had recently died of epilepsy, her father was addicted to drugs and diagnosed with HIV, and she had not been in school since the seventh grade. Determined to try something new, Liz decided to enroll in a special secondary school, just days after the program's deadline. Although the sports were already taken, Liz impressed the school director and earned a place in the school. Her small decision to go back to school, a decision that did not have much thought behind it, ultimately had major results in her life. Liz was inspired to learn, to improve her life, and even apply to college. She finished the requirements for earning a high school degree, won a generous New York Times' scholarship, and eventually matriculated to Harvard University. The consequences of this minute decision go even further. Not only did Liz jumpstart her future, but she also now works as a public speaker, travelling around the country to inspire people to make a difference. As evidenced by Liz Murray's wonderful journey, any choice, regardless of apparent size, can generate a chain of crucial consequences in the end.</p>

<p>This effect is also demonstrated in practices of contemporary dieting. According to Dr. Oz, an accredited doctor who often makes appearances on national television, small planning in an attempt to have a healthier lifestyle goes a long way. For instance, it is commonly accepted and scientifically proven that drinking one glass of red wine every night can accumulate and ultimately help prevent heart disease. In addition, regulated, small portions equally distributed throughout the day is far healthier than binge eating. Dr. Oz also stated that while it may be frustrating initially, cutting down an unrealistically large goal into smaller decisions can have a greater effect at the finish. Therefore, small decisions are potent to amplification, creating more substantial outcomes as a whole.</p>

<p>Small decisions have lasting effects on people and society. As seen in Liz Murray's triumph and current nutritional planning, modest decisions, indeed, can have major consequences. After all, it is not size of a choice that counts, but rather how one follows through with it.</p>

<p>HAPPY GRADING!</p>

<p>Happy… grading…</p>

<p>

Indeed.</p>

<p>Solid essay; at least a 10–it’s over 400 words, makes coherent sense, and is well written. I can’t comment much on the organization, as that’s personally one of my weaker points, but you successfully varied sentence structure and made few or no spelling errors. Your vocabulary at least didn’t feel forced, but the diction never stood out to me either. As for the examples, they’re less cliche than the typical literature examples used.</p>

<p>Random constructive criticism which, given the timed setting, you may already be aware of:</p>

<ul>
<li>I’ve heard that it’s wise to avoid the use of ‘we’ and ‘you/your’ in essays, probably including in the SAT essay.</li>
<li>“New York Times’ scholarship” should be New York Times scholarship, though this error would be a lot less conspicuous in handwriting.</li>
<li>“Liz was inspired to learn, to improve her life, and even [to] apply to college” [‘to’ added to maintain parallelism]</li>
<li>The word ‘wonderful’ near the end of the first body paragraph makes the tone slightly cheesy, but that’s my subjective opinion</li>
<li>“regulated, small portions equally distributed throughout the day is far healthier than binge eating”–about this, I’m actually not sure if it should be ‘is’, your original choice, or ‘are’, but I’d at least add ‘eating’ behind this phrase to make the ‘is’ flow more smoothly.</li>
<li>“can have a greater effect at the finish” seems awkward in wording, though again, that’s a subjective opinion</li>
<li>“After all, it is not size of a choice that counts, but rather how one follows through with it.” Does “it” refer to the size or the choice? [Well, it’s still obvious what you’re referring to, but it’s the last sentence of your essay and therefore will make a bigger impression than usual if it’s grammatically ambiguous]</li>
</ul>

<p>If you’re taking the test tomorrow as well, best of luck.</p>

<p>Thanks! Your response was also very helpful. And don’t worry abstract writing is totally a strength at times… just not for standardized tests, I suppose. That was probably the most awkward essay I’ve ever written. I hate SAT essay sections… they’re a recipe for disastrous writing.</p>